Moving on From a Bad Decision: Don't Let Yesterday's Mistakes Cause Today's Problems

Ever seen that ubiquitous pillow that states—in decorative font, no less— ”Your past does not define you.”??

Well, it’s true.??

Instead of dwelling on the past, each of us has the power to change our future by letting go of previous mistakes. Making a bad decision can be daunting, but it's important to remember it's not the end of the world. Instead, let’s practice focusing on the present moment.

Here are some tried-and-true tips on how to rally (and rebound) from a bad decision:

Own It, Then Bless and Release It

1. Learn from your mistake. Take time to reflect on what went wrong and what you could have done differently. Use this experience as a learning opportunity to avoid repeating the same mistake twice.

2. Accept your mistake. Half the battle is to acknowledge that you made a mistake in the first place. Own up to it and then refer back to #1.?

3. Move forward. While easier said than done, once you've mastered #1 and #2, it's time to move on. Focus on what you can do to improve your situation moving forward.

4. Take action. Even if it takes painstaking effort, make things right, if possible. Apologize if necessary, and take action to correct any negative consequences of your decision.

Forgiving & Forgetting

Ask any therapist—holding onto guilt and shame for past mistakes can be detrimental to your well-being. Women are especially prone to doing this. You know it, and I know it. Forgiving yourself is the first step to moving forward. Mindfulness—or simply being aware of your thoughts and feelings without judgment—can help you avoid getting caught up in negative thought patterns.

You know the ol’ adage, all good things must come to an end? Well, the same can be said for bad things—including the aftermath of the mistake you’re potentially dealing with right now. Is there a lesson you can learn from this? As I often remind clients, it’s likely someday you’ll likely look back and laugh at this situation.

Finally, Let Go of Perfectionism

Perfectionism is, at its core, when recurring thoughts and beliefs tell you if you aren’t “perfect” then the best things in life will always be out of reach. Perfectionists often assume if you make mistakes, then a worst-case scenario is inevitable.??

This simply isn’t true. The reality is everyone makes/causes mistakes—and denying reality can cause undue anxiety.??

Perfectionists also fall into patterns of rumination, which is a looping thinking pattern that focuses on negative thoughts about the past, present, or future. More times than not, when someone asks, “How do I move on from mistakes?,” what they’re really asking is how do I stop ruminating on mistakes.?

At Work or IRL, Mistakes Occur No Matter What

Want to be proactive if you screw something up? Take the time to evaluate what you need to do differently next time to make sure this same mistake doesn’t happen again. Maybe you were unfocused or rushed? Perhaps it was a simple clerical error that’s easily remedied.??

If you find a particular issue to address, do so. And for posterity, if you feel that it would be beneficial to tell your boss/peer/significant other about how you’re going to prevent mistakes in the future, check that box as well.

Remember, if you need to remedy a corporate hiccup or business misadventure, contact us here at Wickham James.?

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