Moving beyond the current crisis starts with this...

Here I share with you a story of upheaval and burnout from my own experience in the sector, and I offer some suggestions as to how we free ourselves from a cycle we have been in for many years. Maybe this story will be familiar to you, given the times we are in. It includes references to violence, death and trauma - so if you are feeling delicate right now you may wish to read it later. Or simply skip to where you see the first sentence in bold.

Sat at the kitchen table of my friend’s house in Scotland in the summer of 2014 - supposedly on a relaxing mini-break - all I felt was exhausted, hopeless and numb after all that I had just witnessed and experienced.

I had not long finished my job working for a large international human rights organisation. It had ended with an intense work trip to Kenya where I was trying to help dozens of people whose lives had been devastated by post-election violence. One of the people I was trying to help had recently died from his wounds.

And the job had ended somewhat unceremoniously: the last chapter of a long and poorly managed restructuring process that had made me unable to plan ahead or know for sure when my job would definitely be ending. My line manager didn’t show up for my last day in the office, and I felt unappreciated for all my commitment during so much flux in the organisation.

I arrived at my friend’s place in Scotland sad and empty. I had nothing left, and I wasn’t even sure whether my work had impacted the lives of those I was trying to help; the image of the Kenyan man who had died ringing in my head.

If you recognise this situation in your own experience - I see you, I hear you.

It feels incredibly pronounced right now, with the USAID freeze and Stop Work Order leading to many staff losing their jobs overnight and many more people receiving assistance suffering even more.

I have shared this story as a reminder that in the humanitarian and human rights space, we are continuously faced with tough choices, and seemingly insurmountable challenges, that feel exhausting. And we can feel terribly alone in that. The USAID freeze is, sadly, one among many of these situations.

I firmly believe that we have it within us to find new ways of showing up as change-makers - with less burnout, more purpose and in ways that rebalance old inequities and injustices.

In ways that build solidarity, community and belonging.

We cannot reimagine, rebuild, decolonise, localise - or fulfil any other new emerging vision - from an empty vessel.

This is simply repeating old patterns that partly got us into the mess we are facing now.

The group processes and support circles I offer promote rest, authentic connection and loving community, helping humanitarians and human rights activists to challenge burnout from the inside out. Helping them to meet the setbacks and upheavals of their work from a place of centredness, belonging and hope.

Come and join me, and dozens of other change-makers who are challenging burnout culture and practising healthier, more compassionate ways of showing up in their work. ?The Vulnerable Humanitarian Circle of Practice runs this week, Tuesday 5.30pm UTC and Wednesday 1pm UTC. It is chance to pause and take stock together. And a chance to share dreams for the future.

After this week, I will be holding these sessions with guest experts focusing on a particular topic - kicking off with Tracy Johnson in March, sharing her work on compassionate communications in the social change sphere. You can find out more about her work here, and join her free taster session this week here. If there is someone you would like to do a guest session for the Vulnerable Humanitarian Circle of Practice, then let me know by sending me a DM or writing to me at [email protected].