Move and Groove 25 - Guilt
I found myself sitting in the LAX airport wracked with guilt... I had booked this business trip weeks ago. I was flying to Boston to meet with other executives and do an all-hands with my team. I was committed.
The problem was, I was missing Mother's Day AND my son's birthday.
I talked to my wife leading up to it, acknowledging my blunder in scheduling this trip at such as terrible time. She understood and supported me in going.
At the time, I was traveling every other week and she was holding down the fort.
She was used to me being gone.
The first delay came on the loudspeakers "Flight 1196 to Boston has been delayed by 1 hour due to a late incoming flight".
My duty overrode my guilt at one hour...
As soon as the second delay was announced (3 hours this time) I texted my boss and told him what I was feeling - "I think I need to cancel this trip, the flight is delayed significantly and I am feeling really guilty about missing Mother's Day and my son's birthday".
He said "No problem, we got you covered. Go home to your family and we will see you next time!"
Just like that, I was out of the airport, in a car, on the way home.
When I walked back in the house my wife asked "what took you so long?"
My duty was overriding my guilt but my duty was all me - no one told me I had to miss Mother's Day for this business trip.
I felt a strong obligation to complete the mission, despite the sacrifice.
I didn't miss that Mother's Day and haven't missed one since.
I listen to guilt a lot more closely now.
Neuroscience Nugget: Guilt plays a crucial role in our social behavior and moral reasoning. It involves several regions of the brain, including the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for decision making and social cognition. Studies, such as the one by Shin et al. (2005) published in the Journal of Neuroscience, have shown that guilt can activate areas of the brain linked with empathy and understanding, suggesting that guilt can enhance our social bonds by making us more attuned to the feelings and needs of others.
Pep Talk: If you are feeling guilty about something, it is a sign that you care deeply about your actions and their impacts on others. Use it as a guide to better align your actions with your values rather than letting it paralyze you with regret. When guilt arises, apologize, make amends, and then forgive yourself.
Learn from guilt, improve through reflection, and see you next Monday! ??????
Be well,
Eric
I help achievement-oriented women take control of their bodies as they navigate through perimenopause. Aged 38-55, they find their bodies and minds working against them. I help them find their MoJo again.
10 个月I'm curious about this story Eric. Did you feel guilty for not going on the work trip? My clients are women, so I only have a female reference point. But the story I hear from them is they feel guilty no matter which direction they choose. They feel that they are letting someone down. Please note, I'm not trying to imply you should have felt guilty about work. Just deepening the conversation.
Embrace Your Ambitions | Marketing & Sales Converting Strategies | Getting you in front of those who matter | Innovating with Unique Creativity | Change that Lasts
10 个月Listening to your gut is something that can really help guide you, thanks for sharing this Eric.
Retention. Commitment. Teamwork. Innovation. Want some? Let me show you how.
10 个月Eric Reiners, another nice silk purse from a sow's ear. "Positive" and "negative" emotions are all just information, amen. It's what we do with that info that counts. Thanks!