A Mother's Testimony

? Taylin's Story - Through A Mother's Eyes?

Where Are The Instructions?

My daughter, Taylin, was born a loving, caring (wouldn't even swat a fly), wanted to help everyone else, took up for the underdog, smiling happy child. She had so much light in her life it was contagious. Her smiles filled our hearts and her laughs were music to our ears.

Taylin is now 17 years old. She has had many trials in her life. All, I wish she didn't have to go through. But they happened. With your first child especially, you worry about doing everything perfectly, but at the same time, this is your first, so trials and errors are inevitable. The situations that present themselves are not always your fault. When something happens that I cannot change I focus on recovery. How do you, they, he, or she recover from the situation? How do I make the situation better?

Well, from experience never giving up is the first key. And in Taylins' case, there were many times I had no energy left to try...again, move forward, or push on, so to say. Mind you, this is hard for me to speak of in detailed words.

So... as I said Taylin has been through negative experiences in her life I wish she didn't have to endure. And if I could have taken her spot in all of them I would have. Here are a few of them...

1. When she was 3 years old she had her head ran over by a truck. It was in our driveway and was not done intentionally by the driver. It was a freak accident. Because of this, she was life-flighted to St. Francis hospital and spent 3 days in ICU, then transitioned to the children's floor. She had a Basilar Skull Fracture, which to my understanding is the most dangerous and severe fracture to have. She was able to recover, physically, as she is 17 now. No physical scars by the grace of God, but she has carried emotional scars of the incident since. She began to have severe night terrors. During these fits, we could not physically touch her in any way as it would heighten her fear. Her father and I would have to literally sit back and make sure she didn't hurt herself until the terror passed {talk about feeling helpless, huh?}. She was scared of everything. Terrified that something bad was around every corner. She also starting having headaches that were intolerable and excessive.
2. Taylin had severely high lead levels from the time she was 8 months old until 6 yrs of age. She had many medical specialists plus many social workers involved trying to figure out where she was getting the lead. Because of this, she had to have a CV blood test done once a month. Which was extremely hard. Many people would have to hold her down because she would fight, it hurt her as well as her father and I to see her go through this. But we knew we had to do it to better her. Mind you 1 time a month from 8 months old to 6 years old. Some may say "Oh they get used to it." But in my experience, she NEVER got used to it. It was traumatic and painful for her. We also had people in and out of our home weekly. So even our home wasn't really our "security blanket" at this point. We were able to find out that the lead was coming from drying her father's clothes in our dryer. (He worked in the oil field) the pipe dope had tested to carry high lead levels. OSHA did get involved. EVERY social worker, Dr, Sanitation Specialist and anyone you can think of said the dryer would kill the lead from the heat. I argued and argued for many years for them to test the dryer and they reassured me that wasn't the problem. She came very close to chelation a few times (Google it for toddlers) which is a scary process, especially for a toddler. By taking extra precautions and trying our hardest to keep her levels low, she did not have to do chelation. If you research lead levels, you will find it actually can cause many Permanent ailments. Anger, confusion, loss of IQ points, to just name a few. So even though she was able to stop CV tests at 6 years old, the damage done to her body and mind was permanent. Her anger began to grow, instead of what I felt was a normal fit, turned into extreme fits. Leaving me questioning "What was happening to my daughter?" The defiance towards me started around this time as well. How to speak to me in a kind manner, how to be respectful to me, and understanding minor tasks became apathetic to her. I could not understand what was happening to my beautiful, happy baby.
3. At the age of 15 Taylin had met a boy, he was 17. I did my motherly duties of questioning, getting to know this boy, speaking to his parents and putting strict rules in place when I allowed him over at the house. After all, she was only 15. She was never allowed to go to his house. I wanted to build a relationship with him and his family before allowing them to be responsible for Taylin if she went over there. This boy in a matter of months showed his true colors. Point blank he is a severe narcissistic man. I, as well as many community residents, teachers, her friends, and family, noticed her changing. And not in a good manner. My red flags erected. And I, "mom" turned into a Private Investigator. This boy threatened many things, from stealing her from us, killing her animals, killing himself, killing her and even threatening to hurt me and her other family members, as well as disciplining her if she made him mad by telling her she couldn't go to school functions, he even controlled what she could wear and so much more. He called DHS on us accusing us of horrendous things. Everything he accused us of, was found as fraudulent, our case was closed as an act of fraudulent accusations. We had to issue a restraining order and attend court. We are still currently battling moving on with our lives and occasionally he tries to get to us through many manors. I definitely learned quickly, even though I did everything I was told by the sheriff, cops, advocates, judge, caseworkers, etc. Taylin and I felt like we were the criminals. Taylin went through so much emotional anguish while he sat back and harassed her and me. Due to this, Taylin lost her self, and at times she almost agreed with what he was doing because she "loved" him and trusted him. He basically brainwashed her. It wasn't until she saw DHS come in our home that she realized he had so much control over us that he could possibly take her away from me, her father, her brothers, and sisters. That terrified her. If you know someone or you yourself are going through something like this please don't hesitate to report it >HERE<. Sometimes tomorrow is too late. During this time frame, she quit being her country minded child that climbed fences, went fishing, caught crawdads. She quit be active, she quit all sports, she loved gymnastics and even quit that as well, she verbally attacked her friends and loved ones, which she would never have done before. She was disrespectful to teachers as well, mind you this child had NEVER been in trouble in school a day in her life..... until then, she went from dressing presentable to huge hoodies, sweats all the time, clothes with holes all in them and not even brushing her hair. Taylin is slowly doing better. It has been a long road but we continue to prevail every day!

Through all of this misfortune, I had put Taylin on many medications throughout her life. (My thoughts) 'I am doing what I am supposed to, to help her." The doctors know what they are doing, right? Over the years she was "labeled" with...

• Difficulty paying attention, and impulsive behavior. 
• Struggles with coping with past traumatic events, flashbacks, nightmares, and tremendous anxiety.
• Social fear, she felt embarrassment in any setting, scared she would be scrutinized or judged.
• Nervousness, sadness, loss of interest in all activities, functionality problems, uncontrolled emotions.
• Severe and impulsive aggression.
• The feeling of worthlessness, guilt, confusion, and appetite loss....as well as some other "mild" ailments. 

Many people know being on many medications causes just as many side effects. She had severe migraines, nausea, lethargy, extreme emotions, even emotions to take her own life, Appetite problems, a form of "zombiness" if you will, and more. This took a very hard toll on her life as well as our whole family. Everyone in our family walked on eggshells every day to try to help, make her happy, pull her out of slumps, held her hand, held her hair, we watched what we said and how we said it, as to not stir up an uproar. We were trying our hardest to keep her safe as well as healthy, physically and emotionally. I am here to tell you that even when you prevail or you are having progress you NEVER forget what you have been through. It sticks with you in the back of your mind. You will always remember the look on your child's face when they are hurt, heartbroken, and lost. You will always remember the pain in the pit of your stomach or the nauseousness you feel when you can't help them like you wish you could... And you will never forget the hours of tears and the headaches from stress. As a mother I prayed daily for the Lord to put me on the right path to help her, heck even "fix" her if you want to think of it that way. I prayed for her to have a normal, happy life, that she would love herself and see her self worth. I prayed she understood who she was and not necessarily change everything, but her and us to know how to handle or even "deal" with it. After all...

"God gave me this beautiful creature, but he forgot to send her with instructions." 

In Jan 2017 I requested Taylin's doctor to take her off ALL medications. I had lost who she was, why we even came into the doctor's office years ago, even though I had written down all the medications and side effects in my notebook. Taylin and I became lost in it all. With NO positive outcomes. He agreed to this request. I asked her doctor and myself...

"Why keep doing the same thing over and over, yet expect a different outcome?" Isn't that the defintion of insanity?"

In July of 2018, I came across CBD ... After some research on the company and the product, I decided to just be a customer and use the products for Taylin and my grandmother (another story for another time). If it worked and showed hope then I would extend it to the rest of my family. So off to the doctor Taylin and I went again. The doctor seemed ecstatic when I asked if I could introduce CBD as a daily regimen. He agreed 100%. He did request I come in occasionally to make sure the CBD was working for her. So with great hope, I started Taylin on CBD in August of 2018.

I am writing this today June 26th, 2019, telling you Taylin wakes with a smile, she does her hair, dressed in nice attire, occasionally does her makeup (my girls aren't big on makeup unless it's a special occasion) she is active in all sports. She occasionally has a bad day just like the rest of us, but nothing close to how she was before. Taylin finds "herself" daily! She's doing all the things in life she loves and she continues to push through every trial and tribulation that has happened to her. She loves her family and that huge heart that God gave her is being put to use, per her choice!

As a mother, as I write this, I wipe my tears, let my heart and mind rest, and smile because I truly have seen the path that God put me on that would help her, as well as so many others! I will never stop educating and telling people about Taylin's Story because it is an amazing story! It is true! And without the guidance of the good Lord, opening my mind, thinking outside the box and having drive as a mother to go and do anything at all costs for her, she would not be where she is today! We were a crumbling mountain without her and now we are stronger than ever!

Go >here< to see the CBD Taylin uses

Taylin's quality of life has gone from a 1 to a 10 literally! I can't tell you how relieved I am to finally do something right! Quality, as well as quantity of life matters! For her, for me, for you! Do not overlook, procrastinate, or deny something that has the ability and benefits to improve your life, a friend's life, a family members life, or even your pets. To learn more in-depth information on CBD look >here<

Taylin and I had so much support from everyone surrounding us through the years and I am so grateful. Family, friends, community, everyone! And now I can add my CBD family into that, they took me on, taught me, and have given me the resources to help every "Taylin" in the world!

Do you know or have a "Taylin" in your life?

Please don't turn your back, overlook, or procrastinate helping them. Guide them, offer your help, reach out your hand to them. Everyone matters!

For Guidance, Suggestions, Help, Or Any Questions At All

Find Me >Here<

Next step?... Finding the instructions!