A Mother’s Guide to COVID-19

Mother’s Day is a day when our attention turns to showing all mothers how much we love and appreciate them. This year our attention is diverted to COVID-19. With mandatory social distancing in place, many mothers and grandmothers will miss the in-person company of family members. 

This unprecedented situation got me thinking of my mother and, indeed, all Irish mammies.

As anyone who grew up in Ireland can attest, the Irish Mammy is an institution. This matriarch has a bank of wisdom that works in every situation. Unflappable, selfless and pragmatic, my mother personifies the Irish Mammy. In honor of Mother’s Day, I’m sharing here some of Mary Jane Molloy’s common refrains along with my take on how these expressions might apply to our circumstance today.

Put the Kettle On

A shared pot of hot tea is the Irish Mammy’s antidote to many a woe as well as her preferred way to hear good news. It’s more than a caffeinated beverage. It signals an intentional pause for conversation and companionship. It’s a quotidian ritual that recognizes a problem shared is a problem reduced; and a joy shared is a joy amplified. As we practice social distancing, popping in for a cup of tea will not be an option, but making a virtual conversation a priority is made possible by the technology we all share.

Mind Yourself

Long before self care and mindfulness were things, the Irish Mammy advised taking care of yourself. It’s practically her go-to farewell. “Mind yourself because it’s going to rain.” “Mind yourself and keep an eye on where you are going.” Heeding the advice of the healthcare and other authorities—practicing scrupulous hygiene, staying at home, maintaining good diet and exercise habits—is the best way to take care of ourselves and others in this climate. The occasional bubble bath might not be a bad idea either.

Don’t Meet Trouble Half Way

The uncertainty surrounding COVID-19 is deeply unsettling, especially to a generation of us who grew up desiring a sense of control. We crave it, we contingency plan for it, we believe we are entitled to it. And then, COVID-19 comes along. That kind of systemic shock was never in our models. While sensible preparation is wise, the medical evidence is clear that assuming the worse-case scenario can lead to irrational behavior (hoarding dozens of rolls of toilet paper), shut off creativity, and provoke excessive anxiety. Conversely, anticipating some silver linings can lift spirits up, invite entrepreneurial thinking, and ward off the doomsday demons.

Give Your Neighbor A Hand

While the literal handshake is firmly prohibited for the foreseeable future, the notion of helping our community could never be more important. Whether it’s calling an elderly neighbor to make sure they have provisions or Face-timing a coworker to make sure they don’t feel isolated while physically apart, or showing solidarity with friends, business owners or strangers who have lost their livelihoods, directing energy to helping others is nourishment for all of us.

Keep Your Promises

Unlike most of the business literature, the Irish Mammy never uses the term personal brand. Instead, she’s quick to underline the importance of reputation. In her mind, building and maintaining reputation centers on keeping your word. In times of crisis, it’s tempting to neglect the commitments we made to our families, our jobs, our customers, our colleagues, our communities and ourselves. For those of us working from home as part of a team, or trying to serve customers remotely, now is the time to embrace constraints to discover new ways to keep our promises. In some situations, it’s going to be downright difficult or impossible. In those challenging circumstance, reputations are formed by how we authentically communicate. 

Say Your Prayers

Whether it’s organized religion or individual spirituality, a sense of greater purpose can provide comfort in uncertain times. Counting our many blessings can help restore some balance in an environment of massive job losses, plummeting stock portfolios, enormous inconveniences, and necessary sacrifices. This can be especially true when faced with tragic human loss. The contemplation of ourselves as more than the sum of our material possessions or accomplishments may be the ultimate intent of the Irish Mammy’s guidance.

Happy Mother’s Day to my mother and all mothers. My thoughts go out to all who are suffering as a result of COVID-19.

No doubt this list is not exhaustive. Are any of the refrains familiar to you? What sage advice can you draw from your cultural or heritage? Please share in the comments below. #wereallinthistogether