Motherhood Dare - Family or Career?

Motherhood dare - Family or career? OR a subtle journey, trying to balance both by constantly prioritizing!!

I come across various perspectives during counseling sessions. It's astonishing to see how motherhood is seen as a barrier or setback for a Career Woman!

Choose between "Being Ambitious" or "Becoming a Mother"! Really?

Many women complain about not being able to balance.

It's a choice!

It's not always about balance, but about prioritizing too. I learned an important lesson from my mother -

One needs to be themselves convinced of the choices they make & not ever try to justify them to others! She was active socially & worked/ volunteered for several great causes.

I saw her planning her days well in advance. It required sometimes to not rest at all, but she was always available for us & we exactly knew how we have to help ourselves in her absence (she prepared us)!

She often use to tell us (my brother & me)- "You both expanded my horizon!

My world is much bigger now & I feel much stronger!"

Children are the strongest driving force for a mother.

My marriage to a soldier was seen as a professional setback by many! Soon after my son was born- many perceived me as FINISHED!

I wanted to devote time to family, relationships! Was adapting to new surroundings every few months. 

With my daughter's birth (second child), I had to bear the sympathy of many!

2 children, fauji life ...your career is over..you are professionally dead!

I had to face remarks like - You were so ambitious! What made you do it?

But for me, this was the most beautiful experience ever!

Whenever I paid much heed to others, I felt suffocated!

I was making a way for myself, I knew I will make it!

My children were not born by chance!! I wanted to bring them to the world.

In this pic, I am sitting with both my kids soon after 26 hours long drive at a new location at my Dining-in party (a norm to welcome lady & the officer to the stn)

I was terribly tired, but was told by my husband - 3 hours more before we relax!

That smile is hearty!

Commitment & dedication is just another name for a lady (especially moms)!

I learned to smile at hurdles & challenges :-)

My 30 days old daughter smiled at me, she made those bubbly sounds when I smiled back at her...with both my kids around I was stronger than ever before! 

Every new location means a whole big unpacking (multiple times guestrooms to a temporary house! A temp house to a permanent one!),

Living in the boxes & with children, it may mean cooking in the boxes too! And yes, I forgot to mention about my work - I am a professional woman!

A backlog to clear & commitment/ timelines to meet!

I was skeptical but not afraid anymore!!

• I had 6 eyes now to see the world.
• I was becoming pro at multitasking
• My patience & empathy had significantly improved.
• I was a better time manager!
• I was more self-aware than ever!
• My horizon significantly widened!
• Efficiency enhanced manifold!

I knew this was the New Beginning. 

I kept trying to balance!

FAILED multiple times! Cried, had my share of lows!

Husband often use to be away on deployments (Infantry officer)

Multiple instances when I thought "I Shall Quit"

"Shall I settle with compromising on my dreams"?

I could never say YES

My mind & heart always aligned to say - "One more TRY!

Who knows you are lucky this time!"

And alongside I participated in everything that I found interesting!

Wherever I could contribute through my skills (paid/ unpaid/ underpaid ventures), I did.

Soon things started turning favorable!

Children were growing up, I was more refined in my domain & was more confident than ever!

All women who are experiencing a similar phase, don't ever give up on your dreams!

It's just about the right time when you are most prepared to attain your goals.

Each day, each experience is a new learning!

There are no Failures!!

Either you learn a lesson (provides scope of improvement)

 OR

You exactly know what wouldn't work for you (your options are narrowed)

There is only one life! Try to live every role you ever dreamt of!!

Your worth is much more than mere compromises :-)

Good luck! God speed!