The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

If my house were engulfed in flames and all of my family members were safe, I would run back into the inferno for only one thing….

• Antique Christmas ornaments matched to every year of my wife’s life? Sorry, Leah.
• My handlettered photo frames? I’ve still got two hands, I’ll make new ones.
• My books? Tempting…. but no, looks like I’ll be buying new books.

These?

You better believe I’m risking it for these.

For 17 years I’ve been building this collection. Each one is filled with the in’s and out’s of how I’ve processed so many major decisions in my life.

Getting engaged.

Getting unengaged.

Getting engaged to someone new.?

Choosing internships and jobs.

Moving to Singapore.

And it’s not just the big decisions, they’re filled with so many other lessons learned about myself along the way.

• I don’t process disagreements well at night, it’s better for me to sleep and revisit the issue in the morning.
• I’m an introverted performer—I love public speaking and performing but need quiet time alone to recharge which sometimes makes me look antisocial.
• I can strengthen my discipline. It’s taken years but I am far more confident in my ability to persevere than I once was.
• I’m a pendulum swinger which is something I’m still fighting off. My default for years was often “this or that” and these were usually polar opposites. I’ve had to learn how to find the space in between.

You get the point.?

And this time of year is absolutely my favorite.?

It’s time for my annual review—which of course is added at the end of this year’s journal.

There’s really only one question you need to ask to kickstart a meaningful review of your year:

How did your choices this year impact who you’re becoming?

That question is so powerful because it forces you to confront several things:

• First, the future—the you who you’re trying to become. Do you know who that is? Have you made the vision so clear you feel like you know that future version of you?
• Second, the past—you’ve got to honestly look at the past year and reflect on whether you made choices that moved you toward this aspirational you or choices that might have moved you in a different direction.

To begin answering this question, I always go back to the beginning. At the start of the year, I answer these questions.

• Who do you want to become?
• What things does that type of person do?
• What will you do to move toward that ideal?

“Decide the type of person you want to be and prove it to yourself with small wins.”

At the start of 2023, I prioritized these areas of becoming and listed several things that someone who embodies these attributes would do:

Connected

• Phone on charger through nightly routine with kids
• Date night with Leah
• Slow down during my prayers
• 1-1 with kids, advisory members, ELT members

Athletic

• Crossfit 2x/week
• 16/8 weekday fasting
• 10 km with 10kg vest weekly
• Creatine/electrolytes/protein

Learner/Teacher

• Keep Asking newsletter
• Keep Asking database
• Sunday seminary prep and 2x/week teaching
• 20/20 manuscript complete

Influential communicator

• Practice with ChatGPT
• Review welcome back at the school
• Review welcome/exit experiences

Disciplined

• Never miss more than a day of any one thing

Generous

• Tithing/fast offerings
• Donate anytime a GoFundMe shows up on my social
• Donate anytime someone knocks on door from a charity
• Round up anytime given the chance at checkout to donate to charity

So now, the question is, how’d I do?

I then go through and begin to write down everything I can think of based on my notes and memory.

The question helps me determine trajectory.

I’m not the person I want to be—yet. I’ll never reach some imaginary finish line but I can celebrate lots of successes along the way and regularly check in to make sure I’m proud of who I am as a work in progress.

That’s the goal. That’s what we all want. All of the other goals serve the biggest goal of them all—becoming.

This weekend, grab a notebook and your favorite pen, talk with your partner or close friend, or open up your notes app. It doesn’t even matter. But take 30 minutes and ask yourself:

How did your choices last year impact who you’re becoming?

What’s your approach to wrapping up the year? Do you have certain questions you ask? A system you follow? Let me know!