The most dangerous negotiation you’ll ever get into

The most dangerous negotiation you’ll ever get into is the one you don’t recognize as a negotiation.

In fact, it’s estimated you’re involved in more than 8,000 negotiation every single year. And many of them are negotiations you don’t recognize for what they are.?

Your phone rings and the caller opens with, “I was wondering if we could move that shipment up a week….” And with that, whether you recognize it or not, a negotiation is underway.??Things of this sort happen all the time—and they aren’t limited to business situations. It has been suggested that as much as 80 percent of your communications with others could be categorized as negotiations.?

It’s easy to recognize a formal negotiation. The parties agree to meet on Thursday at 1:00 PM and negotiate a specific contract. They meet up on schedule, and serious negotiations take place. But even before an agreement to meet is reached, there may well be a number of emails, phone calls or other communications, each and every one of which involves a negotiation. Lesser negotiations, ultimately leading to a large-scale, formally scheduled one.??

Imagine you’re sitting at breakfast when your spouse asks, “Honey, are you going to be in the office all day?”?

“Yes,” you answer. “I’ve got a huge project I need to finish and introduce to my manager, so I be staying until that’s done.”?

Your spouse replies, “Great! Then you won’t be needing the car. I need it, so would you be a dear and take a cab to work? I’ll see you tonight. Love you.”

In either of these situations, you didn’t realize it when your counterpart launched a negotiation. As it continued, you didn’t recognize if for what it was. When it was over, you didn’t spot it as a negotiating loss.?It has been suggested that as much as 80 percent of your communications with others could be categorized as negotiations.?

Listen and watch for the following openings. They are often disguised as something else, but in reality, each marks the opening of a negotiation:?

• “We have to …”
• “I need you to …”
• “I think we …”
• “We should …”
• “You should …”
• “Let’s think about this …”
• “How do we …?”
• “What do you think about …”
• “Here’s what we need to do: …”
• “How can I help you?”

Each time you encounter one of these, pause for a moment. Take a breath before you reply. If you’ve been asked a question, consider whether you ought to reply with a counter question, such as, “Why do you ask?” or, “Would there be a financial benefit for you if we …?” or, “Will there be any cost associated with changing…?” You get the idea, I’m sure.

The ‘small talk’ prior to the actual negotiation contains a lot of negotiation. And of often this laid-back conversation gives us enormous amount of valuable information if we handle it correctly, since we don’t consider small talk to be a part of actual negotiation.??

“How is business going for you guys?”. “Are you impacted by the supply chain issues…?” etc.

Good luck identifying the negotiations in your life. Your success depends on it.?

Over a span of 24 years, Keld Jensen has studied some 35,000 individual negotiators. His objective: to define, once and for all, the difference between a good negotiator and a?great?one.?

Through his research, he has isolated 103 separate skills, which he has named The Great Negotiator’s 103 Steps. The more of these steps you employ, and the more effectively you apply each one, the better your results at the negotiating table. And the greater negotiator you become. And it’s an established fact that we’re?all?negotiators, in life as well as in business.

Sign up now and join the waiting list to be among the first to put this brand-new tool to work for you and those you represent.?