The most beautiful thing

Traffic was about as messy as my hair. I woke up late for a doctor’s appointment that I knew would take an hour to get there from my driveway to check-in. I contemplated wearing the tired yoga pants I slept in (don’t tell me you have never done the same) but decided for a pair of jeans and a cozy sweater. Unfortunately, the first two pairs of jeans didn’t fit. I walked out of the house wearing a cozy sweater… and my yoga pants, disappointed in my changing body.

My thoughts continued to build a case against me. By the time I neared the doctor’s office I had hit PLAY and REWIND numerous times to a tape that made me feel less than and disappointed. I had created a mental image of a girl who had wrestled with the worst parts of herself for far too long.

I have never needed help in pointing out my shortcomings. I know them well. They sit at the table with me, they go to sleep with me, and they rise with me. Past mistakes visit me often in my mind, and I must tell myself God has given me a new identity and a new day. What sins God has put to death are not welcome in today’s living. And although I don’t know that girl anymore, I have learned to forgive her… forgive myself for what God has already forgotten. And I am still learning to love myself as Jesus loves me… shortcomings and all.

Friend, we are all on a road traveling somewhere with our thoughts. Sometimes we make it harder on ourselves by trying to resuscitate yesterday, being anxious in today, and worrying about tomorrow. Add lack of sleep, poor diet, and a long to-do list, and you will discover a familiarity of the strangers traveling on the road around you.

It is no wonder that we hardly notice others unless they cut us off or we collide. We share the road without sharing ourselves, our stories, our pains, and our joys. We can go through an entire week seeing many but having a true conversation with none. In isolation, we have decorated a pretty little cell: wallpapered our phones, uploaded profile pictures on social media, put music in our earbuds… even ventured out in ratty yoga pants hoping we won’t see anyone we know. Yes, we pad our isolation so it doesn’t feel so cold. But in truth, we are often lonely.

We need moments of authentic connection.

Road construction littered my exit. Although I could see the professional building where my doctor’s office was located, I was wedged on a service road behind and in front of many cars. Looking to my left, I saw something that, for a moment, freed me from myself and my thoughts.

There was a skinny little tree with half its leaves resting on the ground. Most of the leaves which remained on branches were bright yellow… like sweet, lemon cupcakes. As odd as it sounds, I smelled something refreshing just by looking at this tree. By taking notice, I saw something more: a nest. Surrounded by construction, loud noises, and crowded isolation… there was a nest tucked in yellow.

Lord, forgive me for not seeing more of what You have for me to see. Forgive me for my hesitation. For thoughts that are not Your thoughts. You provide branches to build nests in chaos. You provide light to shelter us from dark. You provide branches of strength, stability, and peace in Your Word and through other Believers. And, sweet Jesus, You provide a nest built by Your grace, faith, and love rather than allowing us to die in sin and shame.

We are all in need of a nest. But many Believers are often hesitant to extend a branch for God’s love to be showcased through their own brokenness and in a broken world.

We live in a time that often feels barren and in chaos. On any given day it looks as if right has become wrong and wrong has become right. We need a safe place to gather, to be seen; but more importantly, to be accepted and loved. This requires the courage to step outside of our comfortable isolation and into the daily practice of love.

We may appear as vulnerable as a nest on a skinny tree in the middle of a traffic jam… but oh, such examples of shelters are exactly what this world needs.

“God is our refuge and strength,

an ever-present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear….

The Lord Almighty is with us….” (Psalm 46: 1-2, 7).

 Do we appear to the world as an unapproachable, isolated driver of our agenda? Or do we look more like an often out of place light in a hazy world; a fresh peace, and a much-needed safe place to be seen, to share, to be accepted, and to be loved as Christ loves?

 Do you accept yourself as God accepts you? Yes, He not only sees you… Christ ACCEPTS you as His. And when you are His, the tapes of old are replaced with eternal love. LOVE: In all ways and for always.

May we stop toiling in our padded prisons of doubt and live into being more vulnerable, usable, and beautiful for the Lord.

 That skinny little yellow tree was the most beautiful thing I have seen in a very long time. That is… until I noticed the nest.

SGLY, dear readers.

(Smile, God Loves You.)