No More Travel

I’ve had enough travel.?

With all the talk about AI replacing white-collar jobs, I thought I’d see if AI could replace my job. And, I’ve got to admit, I’m quite pleased with the result!?

Back in November, ChatGPT came out with a feature to allow anyone to build custom GPTs, which are versions of AI trained on data to perform specific tasks. You can use this marketplace of GPTs to prepare for the SAT, learn to cook, or chat with Shakespeare.?

So, I created an AI clone of me!?

To train it, I uploaded every public scrap of text I’ve ever written. Every book, every white paper, and every presentation I’ve given at every conference. I even threw in every LinkedIn post going back to 2003. Everything. I then fenced its responses so it wouldn’t make off-color jokes or talk about any “taboo” topics.?

The resulting GPT turned out to be astonishingly like me! I even tested it to make sure Kelly GP-T consistently delivered…well, me.

So, pretty cool, I’ve replicated my consciousness. But I realized I needed a physical embodiment. Computer screens are boring. Nobody wants to talk to an Alexa-like device so I got to thinking…which landed me on the 1988 movie Big, starring Tom Hanks.

I was a huge fan of it growing up. In the movie, Mr. Hanks is a 13-year-old at a traveling carnival with his best friend when, after a day of disappointments, stands in front of a Zoltar fortune-telling machine and makes a wish to be “Big.” He wakes up in the morning as an adult.?

When I think about it, my role at commercetools isn’t all that different from a fortune-telling machine. People ask me questions all day, and I respond with a litany of vague “Only the future will tell”-type responses.?

This inspired me, so, of course, I went and bought an old Zoltar telling machine on eBay and rigged it up to a Raspberry Pi, a microphone, and a speaker, with OpenAI's new Voice Engine powering text to voice.

All you have to do is feed me quarters and I’ll respond to your questions with one of my signature catchphrases:

As an added bonus, Kelly G-PT will hand out fortune cards, providing you with yet another morsel of inspiration from yours truly.?

It’s perfect — Kelly G-PT, the solution to my travel fatigue. Now, I can be at every conference and event.?

I can show up at every meeting I’m asked to attend. The virtual “me” can be stuffed in a shipping crate and shipped by land, air, or sea. No hotels, no meals, no time off, just me, 100% of the time. It’s Kelly G-PT, anywhere commercetools needs me to be.

I can moderate panels, give presentations, and even participate in webinars! I’m always ready, always on and always full of opinions that you may or may not agree with.

I’m excited to let Kelly G-PT do all the hard work while I spend my days at home doing more important things — maybe even updating my custom GPT when the mood strikes. Isn’t increased productivity the promise of AI? Welcome to 2024 ;)?

April Fools!?