No More

From the heart:

So long for now and thanks for all the ducks.

But beware, I am not disappearing, I’ve 40 years more to go!

Reality check:

Imagine this, I am sat here in the dark cupboard under the stairs, with a torch, hunting for my map to find a new horizon point.

I hope I find it, but if not, the sat nav can be upgraded.

Read on, and I will explain.

In a challenge last week, while working on my whole big fat mission, with my mind pondering on all the possibilities, I hit a block.

With a head full of thoughts. I fell asleep and ended up dreaming about the same things.

And it was a full sensory technicolor experience dream. So, I could sense the heavy pulled down feelings in my guts, & heart and that’s what it’s like for me when I’m working with moaning people day in day out.

Now do not get me wrong, those people do really feel their pain and go through awful chronic mental health troubles and have deeply complex layered histories of trauma.

But, in 90% of them there is a massive reluctance to take responsibility for their sh!t and for some almost incomprehensible reason they choose to be relentlessly stuck and, despite offers of solutions & opportunities for a great future, most seem to want to relentlessly be attracted to and navigate back to living in their swampy familiar misery place.

At times it feels like a cross to carry. And I am no saint.

As I slept, smiling faces and happy voices of thanks of those who made amazing recoveries came up, but also the negative words and voices of 'yes butters' and the 'askholes' and the never changers.

It was tough to dream and made me wonder how much longer I should carry on helping those people who I had served for 40 years.

And then I woke up and remembered it all and more.

You see, I believe we carry energy and memories from our ancestors. And during my time on the planet there has been a problem that needed resolving first.

From way back, and I can remember being incredibly young, my life has been about solving a problem, and part of that was knowing that ‘me’, did not understand why the heck I experienced anxiety, fears, and pain. because mine was a childhood filled with love.

At first, I did it alone, learning to read by age 4, and then my world of learning exploded. All through, I gave myself permission to ‘go with the flow’, not worrying where I might end.

And, I got here, at the why of the anxieties and pain and how to get it gone and it is all gone.

Now I am 100% strong, happy, creating, feeling a naturally upbeat high vibe, true to my disposition and have no (yes ZERO) desire to be a tugboat or coastguard to people who are desperately wanting to stay with their anxiety & pain ever again.

So, what am I going to do?

Well, that is why I am in this cupboard. I'm looking for the route map to Pleasure Island, because that's where I intend to go and where you will find me over the next 40 years. Somehow, I sense my path to get there will be littered with reading and publishing books & articles (5 books last year and published into a magazine with 14.5 MILLION readers) being in nature, painting, sculpture, Canva, photography, laughing, dogs and is that a teaching academy on the horizon?

Oh yes, I can see the world’s first . . . . . . .

Ah, no I will stop there, I need to get this map thing sorted first.

BUT, no question, something really wonderful is coming soon!

Love you!

Quack quack

Rare Bird Jay

xXx J