More curious and less technical leadership

Welcome to another edition of the Leading with Empathy newsletter. It has been a big few weeks at Empathic Consulting with the rest of the year filling up fast! Enjoy below and reach out if you have any questions.

The easy way leaders can build more understanding

Early in my career, I had a manager I’ll call Barry. During a particularly hectic period of work for our team, I went to Barry for some help.?

"Hey Barry, how are you doing?" I asked politely.

Barry gave me a distracted look and sighed before answering. "I'm doing well, thank you for asking. How about you? Is everything going okay?"

I hesitated for a second before responding. His gaze went back to his computer screen and seemed like he wasn't really listening. "It's been tough lately," I admitted finally. "Some of these deadlines have been brought forward and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed."

Barry nodded his head in understanding but didn't say anything else. He just stared at his screen with a concentrated expression, as if he was waiting for me to leave. I had clearly asked Barry for help and he knew it too. He turned to me and cleared his throat before speaking.

"Well, don't worry," he said gruffly. "You'll get it all done on time, I’m sure." With that, Barry turned back and started typing away, leaving me standing there feeling unheard and unimportant.

We all probably know someone who seems incapable of empathy - the colleague who remains stony-faced when you're pouring your heart out, or the family member who always manages to say the wrong thing. But why is empathy so hard for some people? There are a few theories. One is that some people are simply wired differently, and lack the ability to understand how others are feeling. Another possibility is that they've learned to suppress their emotions in order to be successful in leadership roles or other high-pressure situations. Or it could be that they've simply had so many negative experiences themselves that they've become hardened to the suffering of others. Whatever the reason, it's clear that empathy is not always easy. But if we can learn to understand and even empathise with those who find it difficult to empathise with others, then perhaps we can help them to find a way to connect on a deeper level.

Anyone who's ever been on the receiving end of a bad conversation knows that the pain of awkward silence is often worse than the discomfort of hearing someone talk endlessly about themselves. Learning the skills of listening and being more curious about other people is essential not just for our personal relationships, but also for leadership in organisations. Good leaders are good listeners. They’re interested in what other people have to say, and they’re curious about the issues and challenges their team members are facing. By taking the time to listen and learn, leaders can develop a better understanding of their people and what motivates them. In turn, this knowledge can be used to create a more productive and cohesive team. So next time you find yourself in a conversation that's going nowhere, resist the urge to tune out. Instead, take a cue from the best leaders and start asking these questions. It might just make all the difference.

1. What do you look forward to when you think about your work??

2. Do you like what you do, or are you doing it because you have to??

3. Are your motivations the same now as when you first started working??

4. If someone asked you why you do your job, what would be your answer??

5. Have the things that interest you in your work changed over time?

6. If you could change one thing about your work today, what would it be?

Trust and communication are essential for strong relationships. If you find it hard to speak to your people, or if you struggle to build trust, ask me for an invite to our LinkedIn group today. You’ll learn from other empathic leaders who have faced the same challenges and overcame them. Together, we can help each other become better communicators and more effective leaders.

If you found this useful, check out our other blog posts here: https://empathicconsulting.com/blog

Modern Leaders, get on social media more!

I had the chance to speak with the ever-insightful Roger Christie on his Your Digital Reputation podcast recently to discuss how leaders must face the Great Resignation with curiosity.

We’re living in an age of where issues that may previously have been hidden are being shared globally instantly via social media. Here's the thing - it does not have to be terrifying. In fact, it should be an enormous opportunity for you as a leader.?

Because when leaders get corporate culture right, social media acts like rocket fuel, amplifying positive messages to stakeholders. Often through networks of employees empowered to sing their praises from the digital rooftops.

Find out more here and follow Roger Christie for more digital reputation wisdom!.

Moments of Fear

Leaders are often faced with the difficult task of motivating their team during uncertain times.?

Times of fear and change can be very unsettling for employees, who may not feel confident in their leader's ability to support them through these tough times.

Leaders who are able to connect with their team members on an emotional level will be better equipped to help them navigate through difficult times. The Leading the Great Reconnection keynote will help motivate leaders to support their teams with empathy and understanding so that everyone can work together towards a common goal.

Check out this short video teaser of my Leading the Great Reconnection virtual keynote.

PRACTICAL EMPATHY WORKSHOP

Scenario-based learning experience to explore the role of strategic empathy

Empathy is a critical business skill. Having the ability to understand the complex situation and needs of customers, employees and other stakeholders enables better decision-making and more appropriate services and solutions. In today's complex ecosystems, the challenge can be balancing the tension between conflicting needs.?How can we use empathy to make and communicate tough decisions??

Our new interactive workshops provide skills and capabilities to support people to implement empathy in their work. Engaging people with scenario-based gamification, this session ensures the theory can be translated into practical application.?

This highly engaging workshop equips people with a lived experience in group decision-making and broadens their skills in perspective-taking. By tailoring scenarios that are highly relevant to their daily work experiences, this session combines theory and practice to drive improved performance and behaviour.?

Check out more here: https://empathicconsulting.com/practical-empathy-workshp

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Thanks again, if you like the content, let us know.

If you want something else, I'm always curious to know.

I appreciate you and wish you well,

Daniel

[email protected]