Monogamy and dating in Berlin

The world of dating has changed significantly in recent decades to the point of unfamiliarity, and today there is a greater supply for singles, especially when it comes to using technology to get to know each other. Beyond that, in Berlin?it seems that I constantly see ads at the U Bahn stations and billboards encouraging singles to find a life partner. Well-known apps like Tinder, Lavoo, Bumble and OkCupid are a quick solution for initial acquaintance but are they really effective for building a long term relationship? The well known website - Parship, that analyzes in depth the user's personality and requires its?users to answer many questions during the creation of their profile in order for the algorithm to make a perfect match between the users (could it really predict a perfect match?).

?

Beyond that, you can find today in the dating industry even dating coaches who will prepare you for the perfect date. It seems that the whole dating system in the city is harnessed so that Berlin singles will get to know each?other, fall in love, develop a relationship and ultimately make more babies that will contribute to the labor force in Germany in the future. And the Berliners themselves? They don't really care about this system. They continue to live a colorful and rebellious lifestyle and do not seem to be in a hurry to establish themselves (just like in the 1960s in the US - hippies, peace and love).?

?

In a city where there are a wide variety of clubs for different communities: gay clubs, fetish clubs, techno clubs, etc... In this city where many residents are single, divorced, voluntary childless or advocate an open relationship, you can not really expect a match with the expectation of childbirth. In fact, there is a certain paradox in the world regarding childbirth. In countries where culture encourages multiple births, there is not really a social system that will take care of a family with many children. Countries with high birth rates generally have a high population density and a lower standard of living.

?

On the other hand, in countries where the system needs a higher birth rate and even encourages families with social benefits if they have a child (countries where the standard of living is among the highest in the world, this is reflected mainly in Scandinavian countries), the birth rate is quite low. In our parents' time everything was simpler and more innocent. A man would meet a woman, go out with her on a number of dates and eventually they would get married without much drama around.?

?

The question is, are we even meant to be monogamous? One of the things I love about Berlin is the topic of privacy. No one cares if you are married, divorced, single, separated or in an open relationship. So many couples have a relationship but do not live together, each individual actually lives in his/her own house and thus, in my opinion a healthier relationship is created due to the fact that both of the spouses/partners could miss each other and they do not see each other all the time. Living together under one roof creates arguments in the long run.?

?

Take a look at the rising divorce rate in the world today. When you get married, the wedding industry benefits from the financial expenses you pay for your wedding and then when you get divorced, you again have to pay expenses (which is why many people nowadays make a prenuptial agreement).

?

I will now go back to the question of whether we are meant to be monogamous, and so that I can answer it, I will tell from my personal experience how I feel about that topic. Between 2010 and 2013 I was in a relationship with my girlfriend at that time, and we lived together for about three years in a private apartment we rented. As a person who really likes single life, and privacy I must say that I got used to living with her pretty quickly and I enjoyed living a shared life together. Understand, even if you are used to sleeping alone you can always get used to sleeping with a partner, our body and our habits can adapt to any change.?

?

After I broke up with my girlfriend, and went back to being single and living alone, I felt?relief and actually felt like I had regained my privacy. So I will conclude by saying that if I have to choose between living together with a partner and a life where I have my own privacy and apartment to myself, I will no doubt choose the latter option. Therefore, I do not think we are meant to be monogamous.?

?

Understand, marriage is an ancient custom that has accompanied us for thousands of years, but at the same time has never proven itself as something stable for us. Will a wedding really make us happy in the long run? For years people have gotten married due to cultural pressures and to this day unfortunately there are families in certain cultures that force their children to marry against their will and see divorce proceedings as an act that symbolizes the end of the world.

?

And now let's get back to me, I personally prefer to meet face to face and not through apps or dating sites, and by the way also for this type of dating there are sites such as: singlefreitag, Fisch sucht Fahrrad and Face To Face Dating. But in case I see someone that I am interested to know?more about, I just approach her, introduce myself and start a direct conversation. This is a great way to instantly check if the person in front of you really has future potential for building a relationship.?

?

Of course in a city like Berlin there is no shortage of places to meet. The city itself is full of bars and clubs. In addition, the parks are crowded, and you can start a conversation?everywhere. The charm of the city is that it continues in its liberalism without any interruption on one side or the other. So what do you think of the dating world in the 21st century? And beyond that what is your opinion about monogamy?