Money, Power, Influence, Respect and Education as an Energy System

I died sometime between October-December 2016 alone by myself, no one was there. No one was there for me as I laid myself down on the floor. No family, No friends.?

I saw the most beautiful thing in the world, I didn't know what it was. I was a flash of light traveling back and forth. Spark by Spark, then nothing.?

I dunno know how long I was gone but when I got up the house was empty, The two people I loved were gone, didn't even check on my as I laid motionless on the floor.

I didn't have the words to explain what I saw, I was too Ignorant and Arrogant. But I kind of had an understanding of the structure in my mind from being a Carpenter and completing a major Infrastructure project early October 2016.?

I quit out of frustration, I was mad at the World. Nothing made sense to me. I saw so many people that worked so hard and become a shell of themselves. Giving everything they had to be tossed aside with nothing to show for it.?

I knew there was a better way, everyone knew there's a better way. Some choose to acknowledge it and fight an uphill battle that ends up burying them. While others choose to try to fight from within, chipping away while still giving energy to a broken system.

I didn't know what it was, I couldn't explain it properly. I thought it could be some kind of Application or Software that could be set up as a framework across the globe in an open-source framework that can be Implemented across Cities ands Neighbourhood that can be easily tweaked and adjusted to suite the individual communities needs. Not so rigid, one size fits all. Take it or leave.

It was going to work, I just didn't know exactly how. I would explain to anyone and everyone looking like a lunatic, I became an outcast as I locked myself away. Trying to find the words to describe it. Reading anything I could to try and get a better understanding of the principal of the system itself.

I didn't have the knowledge and I didn't think?I or the world had the time to wait.?Grin and?be happy with how trajectory of the path was taking us as the momentum and growth of problems were increasing year by year.?

?I told myself I was going to look like an idiot to those around me and the world as I regurgitated?jumbled ideas and and small frameworks out from my mind to the screen as I mistyped and omitted words from my fingers not being able to keep up with my ideas or conversations or posts I was in.

I was frustrated, I wanted to understand the language. I want it out of my head, it has been driving me crazy for the past five years literally. I was destroying myself and hurting those around me that I cared about so deeply. Is what I'm doing worth the hurt and pain, or am I still an arrogant Idiot?