Is modesty a virtue in business?
We like to think of modesty as a virtue. Many religious traditions affirm that humility is a virtue and put humility at the center of moral life. Irrespective of being religious, agnostic, or true atheist the concept that being modest is part of being a good person lingers in our minds. This is understandable because people do not like others who self-promote and have an unrealistic self-importance, and because subordinates resent bosses who take all the credit.
The statement “Do not be so humble – you are not that great” is attributed to Golda Meir, former prime minister of Israel, who had done a thing or two in her life and must have known what she is talking about. It may sound cynical, but the more you think about it, the more worthwhile and reality grounded it appears. Many of our professional and personal goals depend upon us successfully getting others to recognize the value we offer.
Most people have a feeling of discomfort when self-promoting (except narcissists), but self-depreciation is not a mechanism for making people think you are great. It is just acknowledgment that you think it is impolite to praise yourself.
What is modesty? Modesty means understanding the limits of one’s abilities, showing moderate (whatever it means) assessment of one’s merits, being free from vanity, egotism, boastfulness or pretented greatness. Modesty hopefully does not mean low self-esteem. The other extreme – the narcissistic persons are self-centered individuals with a high sense of entitlement where bragging and boasting is a natural part of behavior.
However, modesty often appears as a quality of an effective leader. Jim Colins in his book Good to Great studied 1435 companies over 40 years to determine what makes the transformation from good company to great. He found only 11 companies that could qualify to the transition in their performance from good to great and coined the so called the term “level 5 leadership” where the leader is mixture of personal humility and strong will. 11 modest and humble CEOs running major companies out of 1435 companies or less than 1 percent. Not much. When you think of world business leaders that appear in business related media like Steve Jobs, Jack Welsh, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates or Elan Musk. They definitely cannot be considered modest. If someone mentions Warren Buffet, maybe, but then we are again back to the 1 percent.
One thing is being modest when you have attained the position, and a totally different thing when you are in the process of attaining it. Different forms of immodesty – self-promotion, narcissism and extreme self-confidence - seem to help people attain leadership positions better than modesty. The first rule of marketing is – “ be noticed” because you cannot select what you cannot remember. So, to be known, stand out and brand yourself, drawing attention to positive qualities and accomplishments combined with the healthy dose of self-confidence often makes others feel more secure under such guidance. Because narcissists are more extroverted and have higher self-esteem, they are more often seen as having leadership potential. Although modesty may be highly valued in leadership literature, assertiveness and self-promotion produce much better results in the real world.
The fear of coming across as self-imposing and overly self-promoting has created new actions to look self-promoting, being modest at the same time, like:
·???????? “humblebrag” – boasting, disguised as a complaint. “I am tired of being the only one who knows how to do this. I cannot believe I got this prize”.
·???????? “boomerasking”- asking a question in order not to get the answer, but expecting the same question will be asked in return to you “How many prizes have you got in this field?”
Can one be assertive and self-assured and modest at the same time? It requires self-control (self-management) and a broad repertoire of different behaviors – when the situation requires it will be modesty and in other situations exhibiting self-confidence. It could be argued that we are the way we are. Some call it “being authentic”. But being successful requires learning to adjust to the situation. Success in leadership requires both - confidence and humility without the trap “the more is better”.
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