The Modern Manager: Beyond Tasks and Theories

Recently, a friend of mine made an interesting statement during our discussion about workplace challenges. He said, “A manager is neither a psychologist nor a nanny. Their role isn’t to solve their employees’ problems. Instead, they should focus on task execution.”

These words intrigued me because they open up a discussion about who contemporary managers truly are and how all the theories, formal training programs, and extensive managerial development cascades prepare us for this role?

My Journey as a Manager

My journey as a manager began at the age of 21. As a young consultant in the Call Center of ING Bank ?l?ski, I excelled at selling credit cards and mortgages over the phone. Soon, I started training others and quickly found myself in a managerial development program. My mentor at the time recognized that my active participation and involvement could also pose challenges. He once told me something that shaped my leadership approach:

“If you always speak and fill the space, how will you know what others need, what they know, and what they think?”

I took those words to heart and began following the guidance to?LISTEN. I started actively listening and truly hearing. When you listen, surprising things happen—sometimes even things that seemed difficult or incomprehensible. It leads to genuine acceptance of differences, curiosity about those differences, and a desire for understanding and growth. The willingness to seek answers and ask questions is crucial:

·??????? Why did they do it that way?

·??????? Why don’t they understand?

·??????? Why didn’t I see it?

These questions push us toward exploring different perspectives, learning from others, reading, testing various theories, and eventually extracting relevant knowledge for specific moments and situations. Critical thinking and humility play essential roles in this process.

The Essence of Being a Good Listener and Leader

Listening and truly hearing—these are the cornerstones of effective leadership. What do I hear?

·??????? Joy: Sometimes from small tasks, sometimes from significant accomplishments.

·??????? Satisfaction: When we can check off items from our busy to-do lists.

·??????? Appreciation: When others recognize effort and hard work.

·??????? Challenges: When chaos reigns or information is scarce.

·??????? Project difficulties: When engagement falters.

·??????? Anger: When the magnitude of work or its impact goes unnoticed.

·??????? Frustration: When changes are imposed without proper communication.

·??????? Sadness and fear: When conflicts arise.

·??????? Disappointment: When priorities keep shifting.

·??????? Helplessness: When promotion remains elusive.

·??????? Resignation, fatigue, and burnout: Real emotions we encounter.

·??????? Gratitude: That we’re open to each other and truly listen.

·??????? Desire for more and excitement: The drive to achieve.

My conversations with the team largely revolve around emotions, experiences, needs, and challenges—within the boundaries where everyone feels comfortable. It’s about the human element. After all, it’s people who execute the tasks we outline in strategies and to-do lists.

Beyond Psychologists: The Role of a Leader

Am I a psychologist? Certainly not -I lack those specific competencies. However, I do see people. I believe that conversation, empathy, and acceptance are fundamental human needs. There’s no physical possibility for the HR department, responsible for hundreds or thousands of employees, to fulfill these needs. Hence, we have leaders.

Does this mean that being a good leader is solely about listening? Not quite.

Beyond Listening: The Skillful Art of Leadership

Listening alone isn’t enough. It won’t automatically equip us to react exactly as we desire. Skills are essential for that. Think of it like driving a car: listening serves as the road sign, but to follow it, we need to know how to start the engine, accelerate, brake, and turn. Each of us does it differently, but we all understand the basics.

The Art of Developing Your Own Toolbox

As a singer, I often draw parallels from my musical world. As a soloist, I can sing in any way I like—it’s my decision. However, to achieve that, I had to develop my vocal apparatus through exercises, understand my vocal cords, learn breathing techniques, practice ear training, explore various musical styles, compositions, and vocal techniques. Only by knowing and mastering these elements can I consciously choose my approach—not because I can’t do it differently, but because I want to. And I can, because I have developed my own toolbox.

Similarly, being a leader involves continuous learning, observation, active listening, and deliberate choices. I read, attend training sessions, observe, and make informed decisions.

It Is Time to Give People Managers… Time

Often, I hear other people managers say during workshops:

“I don’t have time for conversations; I have projects and tasks.” It’s become an epidemic.

And this concerns me. Considering the contemporary mental health crisis, generational shifts, and the rapid pace of organizational changes, I believe it’s crucial to allow managers the time to be managers—and simply human. Do you have time for that?