MODE of Cosmic Therapy Esoteric Psycho-Analytic Commitment of Inexpressible Desire
Paula Andrea Pyle

MODE of Cosmic Therapy Esoteric Psycho-Analytic Commitment of Inexpressible Desire

Human beings tend to want guarantees before making a commitment and/or move in a specific direction. It's the old "Heater Give me Heat and I'll Give you Wood", scenario. If you can't secure a definite guarantee, you, at least, expect to be compensated for your efforts.Such a vain imagining. 

Moreover, unless you are a 'High Roller' tempered for the fast, hard, uncertain, outcomes, more than likely, you will hedge when it comes to making a broad leap across the abyss of ambiguity. It really shouldn't be this way, but it is. You want to be SAFE, no matter how much numbed existence follows your logical 'out of harm's way' choices.

Although embroiled in that kind of 'cookie cutter' life thought pattern, you will, no doubt, count the cracks in the sidewalk when you go out for your 12:00-on the dot- lunch break, stare aimlessly out of your car window until the man behind you blows his horn for you to proceed through the green light, order merchandise off of QVC you don't need, and respond in defense if and when anyone slightly insinuates you've made a mistake in your 'normal' daily activities. And, no wonder: your life seems pretty uneventful, boring, dull and uninteresting. Because, frankly. it is!

You want a change but simply don't know how to go about producing one.

Here's the deal: capricious spontaneity. Do you even know that that entails? Your body demands some sort of shocking mechanism to wake you up. Jar you out of your day-to-day rut you've so cautiously and meticulously laid the groundwork for, gutted the trenches which you follow the monotonous course like a cow going to the slaughter house. You've drifted off to sleep and don't even realize it. It's as if you are running on automatic pilot and don't have a clue who's running the control board. In fact, your life has become so habitual; you could operate in, around and through it with your eyes shut. You say the same words, eat the same foods, drive the same places and interact with the same people.

Is there anything wrong with this picture? Not IF you are thoroughly satisfied, passionately involved, sexually vibrant, wholesomely healthy, artistically engaged and intellectually stimulated. But, IF there is a more than a nagging hint of dissatisfaction, unsettlement, grievous anger and unresolved guilt, then, there's 'worm in the apple', somewhere. Usually, it is because you are hiding under or behind a rock of so-called security, protection and self-edification.

In other words, you've stopped living energetically, creatively, authentically and sensually and started existing on the 'glad to have' JOB with benefits. Now, don't get me wrong: I'm not saying that having that GOOD job doesn't make your life more easier to swallow but...

Does your heart swell with passion with the idea of spending your hours performing it? Does it bring to you a lover's embrace of celebrated joy just thinking about showing up for work? Do you sizzle and tingle at night mulling over the events of the day and are you filled to the brim of overflowing bliss at the prospect of getting up the next morning just to have a chance to do it all again? Or are you so tenaciously resistant the idea of slipping into your immediate pulsating, vibrating, sensual, artistic needs, you bury them under the unrecognizable cloak of duty and responsibility?

You are the only one who knows if your life is filled with more headaches, less patience, increased inability to sleep, unrelenting irritability, numerous health issues, sexual frustration (either desires are completely unfulfilled and/or experience increased disinterest), and nervous tension, unresolved health issues, coupled with lack of any real meaningful communication. As B. B. King sings: "The Thrill is gone."


You are WAY too young for the Thrill to be gone! In fact, as time goes on, the Thrill (when it is authentic) gets increasingly more passionate. I'm talking "Baby, Light Your Fire", ecstasy. But, as with all things in life, to experience this kind of reverberating pleasure, you must be willing to exchange. "Exchange what?" You understandably ask. You have to willing to let go of some that rebounding 'security at all cost' tenacity. It's as simple as that.

In other words, take more risks. Be willing to do the unexpected and unprompted. Instead of going right on your way home, turn left. Find another route. You have absolutely no idea what you may discover on this new way home. Stop judging. Your whole life has become a series of 'left over' judgment calls you continually assign people, places and events to. Next; don't do anything for any reason other than you want to do it; certainly not for the expected outcome..

I don't have to remind you, there's something you have wanted to do. But, because you don't know how it will turn out or that others may not understand your desire to pursue it (not to mention how they may not approve) or that 'it' really appears foolish and selfish on your part to engage in, you let it almost get away from you. You've put it on the back burner since there are more pressing things to take care of. Forget about that! Do it, first. Until you do, you will not find resolution for other matters that constantly worry, unravel and upset you.

Natural and convenient human beings do not wear "Security", well. In fact, the unnatural suit of hypocrisy covers for the 'safe and secure' mode in reality. To be auspiciously alive needs no definitive excuse or rational explanation. You need not explain or defend why you do the things you enjoy. But, you will never enjoy them if you are thinking about how much it costs, what you will get from it or what else you should be doing.

On the very same token, now may be the precise time when SILENCE is so vitally called for. Possibly shut down any and all distraction until you are mobilized to act unreasonably.

A lot of people use the excuse of 'not being the right time'. No other time is more conducive for you to live unpretentiously. You simply can't postpone desire. Desire produced the sperm which fertilized the egg in your mother's womb. Was that the right time? Before and during the answering of that specific question, take notice of your 'gut' response. You are living, breathing, moving and expressing YOU for reasons you can't possibly begin to fathom or imagine.

Life offers no guarantee of your being alive tomorrow. Why are you so uptight and conditioned into believing you must keep everything in order by planning and producing a financially secure existence? What order are you talking about? More importantly, what plans can you possibly make to eradicate, diminish or sublimate your innate sublime talent which demands genuine expression?

The pressing question might be: Why would you want to? IF you are waiting for something to show itself, prove it's worth, give you a sign before making the leap, then you are holding up the mule team. The 'still small voice' will never dominate your present predetermined will. Patient and long suffering, incalculable, unexplored, inextricably ineffable layered spirit of celestial creativity beckons. Will you answer?

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