The Mistake of Lack of Pride

Humans struggle with memory loss.

We forget our resolutions. We forget our motivations. Our carefully curated passions fizzle out, and even our life's mission is forgotten! At times, we can't even remember why we started doing something in the first place. Gradually, we become entangled in the mundane. Routines, rituals, and priorities mask our true purpose.

What is true for life, is true for enterprises and entrepreneurs. We become so engrossed in the daily humdrum of our work-life that we forget why the enterprise was formed in the first place. For most entrepreneurs, the reason is neither clear nor remains relevant after a certain number of years. They are so busy achieving results, that they forget to build the organization. The 10th Mistake is about this conflict. Most entrepreneurs are unable to pick a clear and conscious choice.

As life progresses, things change further. We succeed, deal with failures, learn new things, and slowly the priorities of our life change. Our ideas change, our thinking changes. During this entire process of change, we continue to cope. There is a lingering fear, and we are not sure if we will survive the change or disintegrate and go under.

Let us get to the root of this.

Born Rebels

Entrepreneurs always want to be high performers. So much that some of us become rebels. We took to various kinds of modes of rebellion. We pretend that it doesn't matter whether we score good marks or we don't. It doesn't matter whether we participate in extracurricular activities or we don't. We don't listen to instructions; we don't adopt the values offered at home or in schools or colleges. We continue rebelling against everything.

All of this is just another kind of attempt towards high performance. We are trying to make our mark, make our presence felt. By rebelling and still making it work, we want to prove to the world that there is an alternative way of living. We want to stamp our identity and prove that it doesn't matter what other people think. This need to prove to ourselves and others that we are "capable" and "high-performing" is deep-rooted.

When we begin our careers, this need is at its peak. This is true for all kinds of people entering businesses. For those entering family businesses, there is a need to prove to their own families that they can do better than the existing generation, and for those who startup, there is a need to prove to themselves and their peers that they can do better.

When such entrepreneurs build organizations, their purpose becomes the organization's purpose, i.e., the need to prove that we are "high performers". Consequently, we like to deal with only that kind of talent that can give us results.

Now here, we must differentiate between an organization that is not mature and one that is mature.

Immature Organization

In an organization that is not mature, the entrepreneur tries to hire people who are not very talented but loyal and will remain committed to the entrepreneur. All of this is designed such that the entrepreneur achieves more.

You would have seen a shopkeeper hiring helpers, constantly training them, and even rebuking them if required so that the entrepreneur can sell more. Immature businesses function similarly, and the intent remains the same. The only difference is that instead of a store, you could be owning factories. It doesn't matter how many factories. If the intent is about you having more results, your organization is immature.

Mature Organization

Here, the entrepreneur is trying to hire the best possible talent, but the definition of "good talent" is that the people themselves are high performers. Now, whenever greed or lust is present in the entrepreneur, this mistake of the confusion between building the organization versus aiming for results, is committed.

And this is the 10th Mistake that I am sharing with you. We have covered various other mistakes. In the previous posts, we have discussed the desire hypnosis, we've discussed how our worry is such a cardinal mistake, we make the mistake of assumptions, unconsciousness in emotions, the mistake of our intelligence, getting stuck in the mundane, mistake of the unconscious intent, mistake of prioritizing performance over culture, and mistake of raising employees only.

All of these are very critical mistakes. But you have a choice. Do you wish to build an organization? If yes, you need to create an environment where you are building a high-performing organization, instead of building an organization of high performers - and there is a world of difference between these two.

Purpose vs. Intent

A few days ago, I had a conversation with a lady who has done one of the SKC World programs. She is a Chinese national. She was sharing that, over the last three months, her squabbles with her husband had vanished.

Whenever he would try to pick an argument, she would go to the kitchen then start doing the dishes… and yet she remained happy. She never picked an argument. Her husband knew that she was doing some program with SKC World. He continued to pose some or the other kind of challenge, hoping that she would take the bait. But she did not.

Three months went by, and she did not pick an argument. Her husband finally confronted her. He said, "What's going on? Why aren't you picking up a fight or showing unhappiness? In fact, I see you happy most of the time. What's going on? Is it that course that is having an effect on you? I want to know what's going on actually." To this, she replied with a simple question. She said, "Darling, tell me one thing. Between us, and for our relationship, what is more important to you? Is being right more important, or is being happy more important?" And she left him with that question.

Her husband returned to her that evening and said, "I want to be happy". And then in the morning, and then the next day, and for the entire next week, he kept coming back. He said, "It is profound. I am willing to be wrong. But I don't want to compromise on being happy."

Building an organization that is not happy, but is achieving great results is a recipe for disaster. Unfortunately, most organizations today are making this mistake. Focusing too much on results, creating anxiety towards performance, creating insecurity in people. This primarily happens because there is insecurity, there is fear, very deep-rooted fear, in the founders themselves. And with this kind of fear getting spread in the team, the same insecurity spreads within their family members. We are spoiling an entire generation.

As against this, you visualize an organization with happiness, where we overcome all the nine mistakes listed earlier. Where people's consciousness is the topmost priority. If you do the right thing, you will get the right result. And what is the right result?

"The right result is that you're happy while doing something, and you're happy when that something is over."

Your life is the most important thing. Your organization, your businesses, your work is a part of that life. How you approach life depends on you.

If you do not design your life, yourself, if your life design is based on comparisons, on competitions, on the need to prove, or on various varieties of fears that you have grown up with, then your life is designed by someone other than you. Certainly not by you.

You have a birthright to be happy, and your work must be an outcome of that happiness. Remember, something that is grown in the farmlands of happiness will produce happiness only. Don't make a mistake anymore. Sow happiness and reap joy