The Missing Link to a Better Life (or Business) is Not Your Thoughts, It’s This!

Scientists call it ‘the cognitive triangle.’ Coaches refer to it as ‘the model.’ The notion that our thoughts around any circumstance that occurs in our life produce feelings which lead to actions which, ultimately, produce results. Makes sense, right??

Even the Bible addresses the power of our thoughts: “as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” Prov. 23:7.

Today, it’s widely accepted that life change begins with our thoughts. Change your thoughts, change your life.?

But can it really be that easy? Just change my thoughts and live a different (aka better) life???

While thoughts certainly play a role (and a powerful one at that) in the actions we take, long-term change requires something more.?Indeed, one critical prerequisite to lasting life change is glaringly absent from ‘the model.’??

What is it?

It’s your beliefs. Specifically, your firmly-held, deep-rooted core beliefs (aka our perception or world view).

At first blush, it may seem that thoughts and beliefs are one and the same; but they’re not.?They are separate and distinct from each other.?

Thoughts actually flow from our beliefs.?In other words, our beliefs fuel our thoughts.??

Here’s why this distinction (between beliefs & thoughts) matters: if you try to change your thoughts, without first changing your belief system around that thought, you’ll stay stuck.?Repeating affirmations of thoughts you want (desperately) to believe won’t work unless and until your belief around that thought changes.

For example, if you have a deeply-rooted belief that making money is hard or that you must work hard (and long) to make a good living, your thoughts will naturally support that belief.?

Reciting affirmations that are contrary to that belief may ‘feel good’ in the moment but your thoughts will quickly return to be in alignment with your actual belief (ie, that making money is hard). Beliefs fuel your thoughts; thoughts won’t change if the underlie belief is not addressed.

As a business strategist & coach, I see women frustrated at being unable to eliminate thoughts that don’t serve them.?They follow the gurus’ advice to ‘repeat positive affirmations, over and over, until your thoughts change.’ And when their thoughts don’t change, women are left wondering why, putting the blame on themselves asking: ‘what’s wrong with me?’

Nothing! It’s not you, it’s that you’ve been told to do what is simply not possible.

Changing your belief system won’t happen overnight. But it can happen.

Here are 3 action steps you can take today to begin to alter your belief system.

First, all of your beliefs stem from your identity.?So ask yourself: who am I? What do I believe about myself, including my worth. What are my core beliefs about me and my purpose.?

You’ll discover your core beliefs, from which every one of your thoughts flows.

Second, evaluate your core beliefs, identifying those that don’t serve you. You’ll be glad to know that most of the beliefs that don’t serve you are, in fact, lies.??

One ready example that too many women believe is: “I’m not enough.” That is simply not true. God made you exactly as He wanted so that you can fulfill your purpose here on earth. You’ve got everything you need to succeed. Make no mistake, you are enough!

Third, prioritize spending time with like-minded people who will support your personal development journey.?

A day in the life of an entrepreneur, for example, is often fraught with challenges (that can quickly make you question yourself). Be intentional about surrounding yourself with successful business owners who can spur you on and speak truth to you.

Remember this: what you believe is a choice. Which means you are in control (great news, right?)?Put these steps into practice. Be honest with yourself. Be intentional about speaking truth into your life. And watch not only your thoughts change, but your life as well!

As a women's business strategist and executive coach, her life’s work is to empower go-getter women of faith to thrive in business. Former trial lawyer & C-suite exec, Judy Weber believes nothing is impossible! As a little girl from a small town and a big family of humble means, she let nothing stop her from pursuing her big dreams. In her most recent venture, Judy launched and scaled to multi 6 figures, growing a combined social media following of over 40,000 and becoming nationally recognized as a “Top 100” industry influencer -- all in less than 12 months!

Judy is a sought-after keynote speaker on entrepreneurship, women in business, confidence and business leadership and is the Host of the ‘She is Extraordinary’ podcast, straight talk (wrapped in love & grace) about what it takes to make it in business and keep the right priorities in life. She was named a 2020 Newsmaker (in the Creative Thinker/Trendsetter category) by RIS Media and in the Top 100 People in Real Estate & has been featured in Thrive Global, Medium, Real Connections & Pulse. A mother of 6 boys (now…actually men), she feels beyond blessed to live her passion and do life with her husband in suburban Charleston SC.