The misdiagnosis of emotion.

Can you show me with your body what that emotion looks like?

What posture would you hold?

I was sitting with a friend having coffee chatting about life, leadership, faith and culture. We were both part of an organisation that was going through serious and painful change. As we spoke my friend commented that he didn't think senior leadership had done enough soul searching and that it was effecting their choices about direction and renewal.

As I thought about that statement and married it with the current reality of the situation for both the leadership and team I thought about the pain that so many people were feeling and expressing through a variety of channels.?

I asked my friend to show me with his body what soul searching looks like, what posture does the body hold??

It was a seemingly odd request but we both played along. It was the first time I had thought about anything like this too.?

We both decided that it was a solemn posture, head tilted forward, palms open, eyes towards the chest / floor and one of quietness and yet simultaneous unrest.

I then asked my friend to show me with his body what grief looks like?

He didn't move.?

It was a solemn posture, head tilted forward, palms open, eyes towards the chest / floor and one of quietness and yet simultaneous unrest.

Isn't it funny how seemingly competing emotions can hold the same posture? On one hand soul searching is perceived as a show of character, resolve, strength and renewal and grief a sign of pain, hurt, loss, sadness and lament.

As we continued to chat I said that the challenge is that I think people may believe they are soul searching but what they are is grieving and it's this misdiagnosis of emotion that causes friction, frustration and fear.

Emotional intelligence and awareness is crucial in leadership. It is also unbelievably hard to diagnose at times, it requires safety and vulnerability to show and trust to rebuild.?

It might seem like a funny exercise but asking yourself what posture does the emotion take is unbelievably helpful in creating a visual link to competing emotions and provides a pathway to conversation and self-realisation.

Can you show me with your body what that emotion looks like? what posture would you hold?

Two left of centre questions that will help you discover a deeper awareness of yours and others emotions.

#leadershipchange #transition #leadershippain #culture #emotionalintelligence

Mike Gore?is the Co-Founder of?Charitabl. ?Australia's first app based giving platform for charities and not-for-profits. Mike is also Co-Founder of?FaceMail ?an innovative mail order gift delivery service. Mike has formerly been the CEO of Open Doors and has more than 20 years leadership experience. To book Mike to speak at your event email [email protected].