#MiPDV – Admit When You’re Wrong

When you’ve made a mistake, do you admit it??

Not everyone does. Here are two stories that illustrate.?

The gym plays a sports talk show in the mornings. All season, the hosts lambasted the head coach of the Philadelphia Eagles , Nick Sirianni. They questioned whether he should even be in the job. They questioned his ability to coach the team, to gain the confidence of the players and the staff.?

Basically, he could do no right in their eyes.?

They did not make similar comments about any of his peer coaches for as long a period of time. For some reason, they kept grinding on their perceived issues with Sirianni.?

Whether or not you’re a fan of the team, the attacks started to sound personal. The hosts did not let up, even as the team progressed through the season and the playoffs. They gave me the impression that they were waiting for the coach to fail so they could pounce even harder.?

Then, he led his team to a convincing win in Super Bowl LIX.?

What did they say the next morning? Perhaps, “we were wrong”??

Not at all – at no point did they admit their position was incorrect. Instead, they said that he was no longer “in the hot seat”, meaning they might lighten up a bit.

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Contrast that to a story a friend passed along.?

This friend was conducting a multi-day workshop for a number of students. Part of the workshop included a well-known instrumentalist, one of the finest in the world at that instrument.?

The friend knew the instrumentalist well, and considered them to be a role model.?

Until the workshop where the instrumentalist questioned the conductor in front of the students. The instrumentalist argued over tempo, dynamics (volume), and other points of learning that the conductor was trying to convey to the students.?

As the day ended, the conductor spoke to the instrumentalist. The conductor said they didn’t know how to make the instrumentalist happy – they worked hard to prepare to lead the clinic, and the instrumentalist was undermining the conductor and not helping the students. To top it off, the conductor informed the instrumentalist that they were the reason they chose to play the same instrument and make music their profession.?

The instrumentalist listened, then left for the day.?

The next morning, the instrumentalist asked the conductor to speak to the students. Nervously, the conductor agreed, despite not knowing what the instrumentalist wanted to say.?

The instrumentalist began – “I owe all of you an apology, and I especially owe an apology to the conductor. I have not been displaying the behaviors you need to be a successful musician and clinician. ?Yes, I’ve been in pain with an ailment, but that is no excuse for bringing the negative energy and attitude into the room. I hope you can all forgive me. Now, let’s make the rest of this workshop memorable for you!”?

The conductor was surprised at the humility displayed by the instrumentalist, and the rest of the clinic went extremely well. The students learned and enjoyed the experience.?

The conductor told me that they and the instrumentalist have been close friends ever since, and they have performed together and held clinics multiple times over the years.?

Thinking about these two stories, there is a lesson for all of us, whether leaders or not: admit when you’re wrong.?

Admitting you’re wrong is hard – no one likes to “eat humble pie” as my Mom used to say. But when you make the admission, you earn greater respect because you’ve shown that you are imperfect. And everyone benefits.?

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That’s mi punto de vista #MiPDV.