"The Minority's Guide to Hypocrisy: A Masterclass in Selective Outrage"

Ah, the minorities of India—a group so oppressed that their voices have to be broadcasted 24/7 on every news channel, social media platform, and dinner table conversation. Their plight is so dire that they've had to master the art of selective outrage, a skill that has become almost as revered as yoga.?

Let's take a moment to appreciate the finesse with which this minority navigates the treacherous waters of hypocrisy.?

?### Step 1: Outrage When Convenient The first rule of being a minority in India is to be perpetually outraged—selectively, of course. When a certain community's sentiments are hurt, the nation must come to a screeching halt (Remember GAZA). But when the tables are turned, and it's another group that's offended? Crickets (Bangladeshi Hindus). It's a fine balance between being the victim and the victor, and no one does it better.?

?### Step 2: Silence is Golden... Sometimes For a group that demands to be heard, minorities sure do love their silence—especially when it suits them. Whether it's overlooking the atrocities within their own communities or turning a blind eye to the rights of others, this selective muteness is nothing short of poetic. After all, why speak up when you can sit back and enjoy the show??

?### Step 3: The Art of Playing the Card Every good minority knows that there are certain "cards" that should be played at the perfect moment. The victim card, the oppression card, and the "we've been wronged for centuries" card are just a few examples. The trick is to use these cards sparingly, but effectively, to sway public opinion, garner sympathy, and, of course, silence critics.?

?### Step 4: Blame the Majority, Always It's always the majority's fault—whether it's economic disparity, social injustice, or the weather. After all, it's much easier to blame an entire community than to look inwards and acknowledge any flaws within your own. And if anyone dares to suggest otherwise? Well, they must be part of the oppressive regime.?

?### Step 5: Demand Equality... But Not Really Equality is a noble cause, but only when it benefits the minority. When the same principles are applied universally, suddenly the cries for justice become whispers. True equality would mean giving up some privileges, and that's simply not on the table. It's a game of give and take, but let's be honest—it's mostly taken.?

?### Conclusion: A Well-Oiled Machine The minority in India has perfected the art of hypocrisy. It's a well-oiled machine that runs on selective outrage, double standards, and a whole lot of irony. So, here's to the minority—may their hypocrisy continue to thrive, for without it, we'd all have to face some uncomfortable truths. And who wants that?

?Disclaimer: This article is a satirical take on the complex social dynamics in India. It is not intended to offend any group but rather to provoke thought and discussion on the nuanced issues of selective outrage and hypocrisy.