Is midlife a crisis or a chrysalis?

Beautiful people! How are you doing this Friday? Me? Here is a quote describing my attitude to writing today: ?"You don't have to feel like doing something to do it. Just do it and eventually the motivation will follow." – Unknown.

As I finish this article, I will let you know whether the motivation would have kicked in. Aren’t you glad you can use me as your guinea pig? ?On that happy note, let me set the context for what I think I will be motivated to write about.

I am doing a course on midlife transitions. I am doing it because I feel a great pull to support people going through transitions in general, and specifically the midlife ones, and of course, to try to understand and appreciate what’s happening to me! With that background, let me bring you up to speed on this part of our lives that no school teaches us about, and everyone expects we know what we are doing, but we all know at best we are just winging it! And for you younger ones who aren’t there yet, read on, you might have a better appreciation of your older siblings, parents, and the co-worker you wonder why s/he hasn’t retired yet. ?

Midlife transitions are a natural part of life, presenting opportunities and challenges. As individuals navigate this pivotal stage, they encounter various hurdles that demand resilience and self-awareness. Here are some key challenges:

1?? ??Identity Evolution: Reevaluating goals and values can lead to confusion and uncertainty about one's identity and purpose. Imagine someone who has just retired from a 30+ year career. Who are they if the job title no longer applies?

2?? ??Career Reassessment: Peak career years may coincide with a desire for change or a need to confront job dissatisfaction. And yet, sometimes we are frozen by the fear of change. I read a funny phrase-I forget where- “Can I both change and stay the same?”

3?? ??Relationship Dynamics: Midlife often prompts a reassessment of relationships, requiring effective communication and intimacy maintenance. I like how Betty Friedan, feminist writer and author of The Feminine Mystique defines midlife "Midlife is not a crisis; it's a time for renewal and a time to move to a new level of self-understanding and self-expression."

4?? ??Health Awareness: Aging brings physical changes, necessitating proactive health management and lifestyle adjustments. Know anyone (or is it you) who can’t shed weight no matter how much you diet or exercise? Do you fear going for your annual check-up because the doctors are bound to find something negative?

5?? ??Financial Planning: Balancing responsibilities such as supporting children and planning for retirement can be financially stressful. Children are staying home longer, while in my generation by early 20s we were out fending for ourselves and maybe even paying school fees for younger siblings. I think our children are fed up with parents saying ‘By the time I was your age, I was…..’ you know what you were, truthfully or a little exaggerated with time. ?

6?? ??Existential Reflection: Reflecting on life's meaning and legacy may lead to existential questions and introspection. "Midlife is the time to let go of an overdominant ego and to contemplate the deeper significance of human existence." - Carl Jung, Swiss psychiatrist and founder of analytical psychology. Couldn’t have put it better, so won’t even try.

7?? ??Empty Nest Transition: Adjusting to an empty nest as children leave home requires emotional resilience and newfound independence. Does anyone want to argue with that?

8?? ??Social Comparison: Comparing achievements with peers can trigger feelings of inadequacy or envy. We all tell our teenagers not to give in to peer pressure. Have you felt pressure yourself, when your neighbors, peers, and friends are changing cars at will, when they must announce at every opportunity what university their children are at, and they can’t leave it there but must add ‘studying medicine, law etc?’

Navigating midlife challenges requires resilience, support, and a growth mindset. Embracing this stage as an opportunity for personal and professional development can lead to renewed fulfillment and purpose. Let's thrive together in the journey of midlife transitions! #MidlifeJourney #PersonalGrowth #CareerDevelopment #LinkedInOptimized

P/s Motivation did kick in somewhere! Just start whatever you need to do, and trust the process!