MidLife?—?AI Adam Grant and Oliver Burkeman Duke it Out

TLDR: Midlife transition is daunting. Sometimes you need a friend?—?or expert. This article imagines how authors Adam Grant and Oliver Burkeman might argue together to help me navigate this period with purpose and resilience. Discover essential questions to focus on meaningful contributions, adapt to new challenges, and find joy in the second?stage.

You know that moment when you’re sipping your morning coffee and feel the gut punch:

• Midlife is here, and
• The life script needs a serious rewrite.

This is me. My life went from flying around the world as tech executive to explaining to my father who has dementia how to use search to find files on his computer or explain what to do with a knapsack after he found one in his cabinet.

My transition wasn’t a bump in the road; it was a full-on train wreck that made me rethink everything from career goals to personal fulfillment.

Life questions require guru level insights. I mean if I had the answers, I wouldn’t have been hanging out on the train tracks, right?

Who are experts that can guide my midlife?

I pulled in Adam Grant and Oliver Burkeman using ChatGPT and asked them to duke it out (virtually) until they came to a consensus on the big questions we run into in the second half.

• Grant is the omnichannel organizational psychologist, podcaster, and author who focuses on resilience, continuous learning, and making an impact. His prolific Instagram posts always find me in the moment (thanks algorithm) when I am looking for an inspirational thought or way to reframe my mind as part of personal and intellectual growth.
• Oliver is a journalist and author who emphasizes embracing the finitude of life to drive more purpose and focus in his book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Mangagement for Mortals . He writes about how to get over the addiction we have to busy-ness.

By having them debate, ChatGPT synthesized their insights into practical, no-nonsense advice about creating a roadmap for a purposeful second half of life.

As part of my mission to reach people who are AI curious or challenged, this article gives you easy ways you can use AI beyond where you are today. I want you to see how simple and fun it is to make AI relate to you and for you to use it as an intelligence that can amplify you, your professional or personal goals, or business outcomes. At Ignite-AI, we work with people and businesses to help them apply AI’s intelligence in wonderful and mind blowing ways. DM me with your email if you want to test drive my ChatGPT course to ease your way into AI confidently. I will send you the link for FREE if you promise to give me feedback.

The Big Debate on Life Purpose: Grant v. Burkeman

Qualification on use of AI and these authors?—?I am sure actual Grant and Burkeman would never argue in real life, they seem like marvelously nice people. This is a simulation based on articles, interviews and other information about and by these two available publicly. Also I contributed by actually buying and reading their books. Highly recommend you do too.

BQT to ChatGPT: Could you have Adam Grant and Oliver Burkeman argue about the essential questions those of us in midlife ask ourselves until they come up with a consensus on how to map a purposeful second half?

This is the debate AI Grant and Burkeman had:

Adam Grant: Oliver, midlife is a pivotal time for reinvention and making meaningful contributions. One essential question I emphasize is, “In what ways can you use your skills and experiences to make a meaningful difference in the lives of others?” It’s about staying relevant and impactful, even when life throws curveballs.

Oliver Burkeman: I agree, Adam, but we also need to address the reality of our limited time. A crucial question to ask is, “How can you make the most of your finite time, focusing on what truly matters?” It’s about finding depth and meaning in the time we have, rather than constantly striving for more.

Adam: True, Oliver, but resilience and adaptability are also key. Midlife often brings unexpected challenges, so we need to ask, “How can you build resilience and adapt to new challenges in a way that aligns with your values and long-term goals?” This helps in moving forward positively, regardless of circumstances.

Oliver: I agree, Adam, but let’s not overlook the importance of acceptance. It’s essential to ask, “How can you accept the limits of your time and focus on what brings you genuine fulfillment?” This shift can lead to a more contented and intentional life.

Adam: Acceptance is vital, but so is continuous growth. People should also ask, “What new skills or knowledge can you acquire to stay engaged and inspired?” This keeps the mind active and opens up new opportunities, preventing stagnation.

Oliver: And along with growth, we should emphasize presence. Asking, “How can you cultivate a deeper presence in your everyday life?” helps people to appreciate the here and now, finding joy in the present moment rather than constantly looking ahead.

Consensus: Adam and Burkeman

ChatGPT?—?By synthesizing these insights, we can frame the essential questions for navigating midlife transitions:

• “In what ways can you use your skills and experiences to make a meaningful difference in the lives of others?” Focuses on contribution and impact, aligning personal purpose with broader community benefits.
• “How can you make the most of your finite time, focusing on what truly matters?” Encourages finding depth and meaning in the limited time we have.
• “How can you build resilience and adapt to new challenges in a way that aligns with your values and long-term goals?” Addresses the need for adaptability and resilience amidst transitions.
• “How can you accept the limits of your time and focus on what brings you genuine fulfillment?” Emphasizes acceptance and focusing on true fulfillment.
• “What new skills or knowledge can you acquire to stay engaged and inspired?” Encourages continuous learning and personal growth.
• “How can you cultivate a deeper presence in your everyday life?” Focuses on appreciating the present moment and finding joy in the now.

And chat over. Take a bow my AI gurus.

For me the next step is putting my time based on my answer to these questions?—?having been thinking about this for about 6 months now, I think I am going in the right direction.

• I have been in rehab over my prior addiction to “busy-ness” where my worth was measured by the number of meetings I attended and emails or texts sent.
• Meaning has come from making new friends and reconnecting with old ones.
• Making a difference for me would be getting more every day people like us to use AI by making its intelligence relate to the user.

Recovering from Productivity Addiction

I used to counsel members of my team on working better not harder, no one wants the gravestone to say, “I sent one more email.” Or the other productivity means more activity trap is all the Ai transcription assistants attending meetings which solves our anxiety about missing anything but does nothing to deal with the core issue which is most meetings could be an email. More in this case is not more…. And yes, my life to date has been a case of do what I say not what I do… love to anyone on my team who got an email from me at 3am.

Burkeman is like me, a recovering productivity and efficiency addict. I highly recommend his book and posts . He writes that if we live to 80, we get about 4,000 weeks. Knowing the finitude of life is not a reason to get anxiety, it actually is freeing. If we know we have limited time, Burkeman says, we are more likely to want to spend it doing the meaningful things, and in seeking to the answers above. My key takeaways were

• You won’t be able to achieved everything. It is ok.
• Don’t wait to start your life for those things to be achieved?—?like I will put myself out to date when I have lost 10 pounds.
• Multi-tasking actually is a great way to get nothing done, or at least, not the important things done.
• Manage your work-in-progress list to three things. When you complete of finish one, then you can add another.

If you are trying to figure out work-life balance and knowing that is not a thing, feeling stressed and overwhelmed by your to do list, have been told to get on board with AI to automate workflows, or otherwise have symptoms of busy-ness addiction, I am glad you are here.

To get you started on rethinking what you do and how much you accomplish in a day, I created a Life Coach here that you can use for FREE! The only thing you need to do is create an account (also can be free on Chatgpt.com ) and then you are off and running!

The Life Coach walks you through questions based on Burkeman’s book, but the best exercise to me comes from a story he tells about Warren Buffet. According to the story, Buffet guided someone to write their top 25 priorities or goals for the next few years. Then he had them circle the top 5. He asked his acolyte what would happen to the bottom 20. The guy responded, well I will focus on the top 5 and fit the other 20 in as I can.

Of course, the Oracle from Omaha said, no, you are thinking about this wrong. You need to avoid doing the 20 at all costs. Cross them out. Stick the list somewhere you will remember. This is a discipline in elimination and recognizing you don’t have time to accomplish everything. The moral is to avoid that which interferes with what is most important.

Comment below if you have tried or will try this. Follow me on Medium at Ignite-AI or Linkedin for more!