A Message on Starting Over

We don't need a new year, anniversary or birthday to start over. Forgive yourself and start over today and on any day.

• Forgive yourself for the old habits, for the thinking that supported the habits, the beliefs, stories and perceptions that you held on to justify those habits and the thinking.
• Forgive yourself for things you least expected and you had anticipated, for the decisions you felt you had to make, for the risks you took and the end results.
• Forgive yourself for the relationships you had to let go of, hold on to, play with, pull away from and dive deep so fast. For the love you demonstrated & believed to be true which broke your heart.

You may find yourself holding on to the anger and resentment by trying to analyse and get to the root cause for answers you may never discover. That's an exercise in futility. It keeps you in a warp. Instead, allow yourself acceptance and forgiveness.

Acceptance for what has happened and the forgiveness to let go. In my personal experience, I found that acceptance was the harder of the two so forgiveness came very slowly.

1. When it came to accepting what I did to me, intentionally or otherwise. It was easier to judge and criticise myself, shame for what happened and continuously questions how could I, an adult, subject myself to such habits, results and outcomes. So I stopped with judging, shame and criticising. They were eating into my self-confidence and trust.

2. Accepting the moments that resulted in broken hearts is a challenge too. But holding onto that anger and resentment becomes the way we choose our responses going forward, without even realising. We say no to things that are better because of the deep hurt and lack of self-trust.

3. There's also the belief that if we've forgiven, then we have must have learned the lesson. I have realised too that that isn't the case. Life has a special way of checking in again to see what we'll do if the same thing should happen. Will we choose from anger & resentment or acceptance and forgiveness the next time?

There's a relief that comes with these two: Acceptance and Forgiveness. We offload the guilt & pain and make decisions from a better place. They also give us the power to choose differently and from a more peaceful, loving and gentle place within us.

Acceptance and forgiveness take time... your time and terms. Like an entangled ball of rubber bands. Some could snap harder than others.

Allow the grief to wash over you. Keep forgiving and accepting. The more you allow that peace, love and gentility in your heart, the more you stand in truth and you know exactly what you need to do. Then, more abundance, grace and freedom flow into your life as you have more space to receive them.

Fill your cup with acceptance and forgiveness and before you know it, you will discover the abundance, grace and freedom you've been seeking all along.

You can always start over!