A Message for Graduates and Those Who Love Them

I originally wrote this article at the beginning of the pandemic, but it's still so relevant!

For those who are graduating from college…

My oldest son graduated from college four years ago with a theater degree. He worked at Whole Foods during the pandemic, and then he worked at a credit union. Now he is employed as an educational assistant.

Liberal arts graduates face a future that’s especially uncertain. I understand if you are feeling discouraged and uncertain about your future. You might have to rely more on your parents or friends at first.

When I graduated from college with a B.A. in English, I had no clue what I would end up doing.

My English professors suggested I not go straight to grad school, so I heeded their advice. I headed for Japan in the fall, the best choice I ever made. I taught English for three years and met my husband there. When I returned to Oregon, I still didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life.

I began temping and endured a couple of horrible jobs before landing a temp job at environmental consulting firm CH2M HILL, where I worked for 28 years. In the first few months, I interviewed for an admin assistant job. Of course I didn’t get it when I honestly answered I didn’t want to be doing that kind of job in a year’s time. Then one of the men interviewing me said the magic words: “Do you know we have an editing department?”

My entire career at CH2M HILL was full of these types of stories. An opportunity appeared in front of me, mentors encouraged me to apply, and I progressed. I’m not much a goal setter; I’m more of a float-along-and-see-what-appears type. But when that golden ring appeared before me, I grabbed it.

During those 28 years, I worked as a technical editor, newsletter writer, proposal manager, group leader, department manager, Northwest Regional Publications Manager (for 13 years), Northwest communications manager, business development manager, and finally marketing & communications manager…all with an English degree.

In the 34 years since I graduated from college, this is what I’ve learned:

• You have time. You might feel like you should have a super-important job by now, but trust me…you have plenty of time to climb the career ladder. Unless you majored in engineering and have been picked up by an engineering firm before you graduated, you’ll probably have to wait a while until you earn a decent income. Very few people land high-paying, prestigious jobs right out of college.
• You can’t waste time worrying about what other people think about your life choices. I know you’re feeling pressure from your parents and other older people, but it’s your life. Ask them to show you some grace as you get your bearings and decide what you want to do with your life. Explore the world and find your path.
• Most people change their careers several times before finding one that fits. It’s never too late to follow your dreams. Countless people shift careers several times after college, like my friend who began as an engineering major and is now a nursing professor. Many people are not satisfied with their first career choice.
• You don’t have to use your major to find a job you love. One friend worked as a CPA for years until he reinvented himself as a home builder. It’s most important to find a job you enjoy.
• Finding coworkers you enjoy and a positive workplace where you feel appreciated can be enough for a while. I stayed in my last two jobs longer than I should have because I loved my coworkers, even though I was less than thrilled with my managers. Great coworkers make your days worthwhile!
• Life’s too short to work in a job you don’t like. Anytime I heard an employee complaining about work, I asked them this: are you happy in your job more than 50 percent of the time? If the answer was no, I’d tell them they should look for another job. I would rather have engaged, satisfied employees than unhappy ones. You spend so much time at work during your life that it’s important to enjoy what you’re doing.
• If you don’t feel appreciated by your boss, start looking for another job. If I don’t feel appreciated, I cannot thrive. If you’ve been working in a job for six months to a year and you don’t feel appreciated for your hard work, start looking for your next opportunity.
• Be patient. You’ll find something that fits into your passion and makes money. It just might take a while. That’s okay, though, because you are still young. Many people don’t find this sweet spot until they’re in their 30s, 40s, or 50s! Back to the first bullet and the theme song of “Orange Is the New Black,” “You’ve got time.”

And a message for parents and others who love these college graduates!

When I’ve experienced some anxiety about my own children’s futures, I try to remember that I was not always a go-getter when it came to job hunting. When I returned from Japan, I remember my extremely hard-working dad getting agitated that I wasn’t looking for a job as hard as he thought I should. Of course, the extra pressure I felt made me even less inclined to amp up my job hunt. The most important thing our young people need right now is love and encouragement.

Here are some reminders for parents, aunts and uncles, grandparents, and friends:

• Take a chill pill! Our young people are already feeling overwhelmed. One young person told me her parents keep reminding her she needs to get off their insurance. Don’t add to their stresses by reminding them of their looming college loans or need to get insured. They know, they know. Encourage, but don’t overload them. Give them grace.
• Let them chase their own dreams, not yours. Support them in pursuing their own dreams, not chasing yours. Some parents even choose to withdraw funding for college unless their kids pursue “practical” majors. A study in the UK found that “More than half of the students who took part said that their parents tried to exert influence over their choice of course or career, while 69 percent said their parents had tried to influence their choice of university.” We need to let our children choose their own way. If they choose yours, they might waste years before they discover they are not happy.
• College offers far more value than a major. If your child does not end up pursuing a career or getting a job that fits their major, let it go. The four-year college experience offers so much more value than a bachelor’s degree. College enables independence, intellectual stimulation, autonomy, and creativity. Even if your accounting major becomes a house builder or a plumber, they will have benefited from their college experience.

When I changed my major from education to English, my parents didn’t skip a beat. They had both been education majors who later realized they didn’t really like teaching. My dad went on to become a social worker and my mom became a mental health therapist. That’s probably why they blithely accepted my change of major!

But I must confess to some discomfort with my oldest son’s choice to major in theater. I encouraged him to get a more practical minor, and I tried to be supportive even as I worried. This parenting stuff is no cake walk!

I’m glad he earned his four-year degree and had a wonderful college experience. Feeling comfortable on stage and speaking in public, being outgoing and friendly, and being able to organize a complicated production and team of people are all important skills that will serve him well in any career. And I'm incredibly proud of him for working hard in each job he's had.

Whatever you do, please don’t say “I just hope they find a job where they can use their major.” If I hear someone say this one more time, I might scream. I cannot begin to tell you how many times I’ve heard people say this about many people in my life.

The Takeaway

During this time of the “Great Pause,” many of us reassessed what matters most in our lives. Here's a reminder!

Think about how much material possessions mean to you. Are you longing to travel? What do you need to do now, before you have long-term commitments like marriage and family? What kind of job will be fun and offer challenges, in addition to flexibility? How can you spend your time in ways that match your values? Can you come up with a way to contribute to the greater good?

Take a deep breath.

Celebrate what you’ve accomplished and tackle your future as you did your college career.

Take your time and develop a plan.

And congratulations graduates! You’ve got this. You’ll find your way.

Let me know if you can use help with internal or external communications, marketing, or leadership.

I help professional services firms avoid BORING and boost employee engagement, productivity, and readership. I translate technical, complex, and lackluster language into accessible, dynamic, story-driven text. Get known in your industry through outstanding thought leadership content. Walk your talk through outstanding, effective communications with your employees and clients.

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