Mentorship Matters

Today I reflect on mentorship and it’s vitality in my life—professionally, academically and personally. I like to think that it is my strength and determination that has brought me to where I am, but my mentors surely got me here quicker. I want to first share my tips for finding and maintaining effective mentor-mentee relationships and secondly give shout outs to two of my mentors and explain the dynamics and conception of our relationships.

 Findings and Maintaining Mentor-Mentee Relationships:

 1. Work to Form Mentorships Naturally

I’m a hater of forced mentorship relationships. In some rare cases, they work by coincidence. However, setting up mentorships, to me, is like going into a high school and forcing two students to be friends. Maybe they will hit it off, but friendship works better when it happens naturally. That being said, when seeking mentorship, we must put ourselves in situations in which mentorship can happen naturally by attending networking events and office lunches and by reaching out (via Linkedin, perhaps) to set up coffee or lunches with potential mentors.

 2. Establish Boundaries

Boundaries are crucial to a productive relationship and not all mentorship relationships are the same or require the same boundaries. Sometimes mentors become friends but in general, mentorship relationships should be treated professionally. Texting Jeremy at 3am saying I’m having a life crisis is probably not appropriate, whereas emailing or texting him during employment hours and asking to set up a lunch meeting to get advice on my career goals would be. Boundaries, as in any relationship, are things that are sometimes assumed, sometimes discussed and and sometimes learned; regardless: establish them. Boundaries to consider: time, communication method, subjects discussed and more.

Tip: The typical mentor-mentee meet ups are lunches and coffees, which are excellent. Also consider inviting your mentor/mentee to attend an industry event or conference together!

3. Mentorships Take Maintenance:

As in any relationship, maintenance and communication are key. Establishing a mentor/mentee relationship is only the first step. A mentor is not just someone you add to your references list for jobs and never speak to again unless you need them. Following pre-established boundaries, the relationship must be maintained through periodical meet-ups and check-ins.

 4. Break the Mentorship Mold:

Oftentimes, mentor/mentee relationships are not as symbiotic as other relationships. Often, the mentor is giving more than they are receiving. Challenge yourself, as a mentee, to consider what you can give to your mentor in return. Perhaps your mentor would appreciate a review on their LinkedIn about their leadership and mentor skills. Which work projects could you support by attending events, sharing social media posts or participating in research? Who in your network should they meet? Even something as small as scheduling meetings closer to their location makes a big difference. 

5. Take Advantage of the Opportunity

Mentors are an incredible resource. Following boundaries previously set, brainstorm ways in which the mentorship can be beneficial for the mentee beyond just advice. Consider how the other person’s network benefits your needs. Swap resumes or cover letters. Could the mentor give the mentee an office tour? Mentor-Mentee relationships are unlike any other--they are professional in nature, but have personal aspects and connections. Often, the mentor has industry knowledge and enough personal disconnect to provide unique advice and guidance. Utilize the opportunity with which you have been presented!

My Mentors:

Jeremy Martin: In the Spring of 2015, as a university tour guide, I was requested to give a tour to visiting guests for UC’s first annual Social Media Week. I met Jeremy Martin, the coordinator of the week and Director of Digital Communications for UC, when no one showed up for the tour, which we laugh about today. I told him that his job was possibly my dream job and asked if I could pick his brain. I went to his office the next week to chat where he offered me an internship. I worked under Jeremy at GRUC for just over two years and it COMPLETELY shaped my college experience. I wouldn’t be in this masters program if I hadn’t worked in a collaborative media based environment. Jeremy was the best boss. He let us (myself and the other interns) forge ahead with crazy ideas, had us attend meeting with high university administration and always recognized our voices. Additionally, he recognized when we were having a hard time with school or personally and would ALWAYS offer to talk about it, give us some time off or whatever we needed. He is also ridiculous and always had us laughing at Portlandia clips or meme ideas for a tweet.

I left my internship in May of this year and moved 4000 miles away for grad school but Jeremy still texts me periodically to ask how school is going, about my plans after graduation and how he can help. When I visit home next month, we plan to get lunch and not only will it be great to catch up but I know that he will help me with the big questions I currently face as graduation looms.

Nicole Jenkins: Nicole and I met in the fall of 2014 when I worked in another division of her department as a student worker. While I rarely worked with her, she would always walk through the office and chat with me or go to lunch with our division. Summer of 2015 I was preparing for a semester abroad when Nicole approached me about an international student program she was re-launching. She knew I was very involved with student leadership positions on campus and had a passion for international education and asked if I would help. The semester I was abroad, I sent her notes on my experiences as an international student and my observations of similar groups at my French University. Upon my return I worked closely with Nicole and other students and staff to create and reorganize the IPALS program. Nicole and I would have chats in her office often over the next year and a half that started as business meetings about the next event or training program and always turned into long chats about life. Nicole always pushes me to do the things that scare me and to trust the process of my life. She’s one of the people who pushed me to move abroad and I’m so grateful.

Today, Nicole and I talk about once every 1-2 weeks just to catch up or talk about what IPALS is doing. When I was having a hard time when I first moved to Holland, Nicole Skyped me for 2 hours and let me talk her ear off and, more importantly, made me listen to her support and advice even when it was hard to hear.

As I grow in my career, I look forward to seeing how these and other mentorships grow as well as the opportunity to be a mentor myself.