__//||\\__ Mentoring as Legacy Newsletter 12
Stephen Hobbs
Guide Olders to Elders solo-aging to become mentors on the path to live their extraordinary legacy life
Tip/Insight:: Summary Notes for This Week's Newsletter Article
Article:: If You Are Answering Questions Wholeheartedly It's About Mentoring
Resource Links
Insight
ARTICLE
If You Are Answering Questions Wholeheartedly It's About Mentoring
Moving In
Mentoring is about being fully present and committed to helping someone grow. When a mentor answers a mentee’s questions with wholeheartedness, both are practicing true mentoring.
Mentee Asks Questions of Mentor
Seek Guidance: Mentees often have many questions. They might ask for advice on life decisions, such as choosing a career path or handling personal challenges. They might also seek help with developing specific skills or gaining new knowledge.
Opportunity for Insight: Each question a mentee asks is an opportunity for you, the mentor, to share your insights. Your answers can provide valuable direction and help the mentee see things from a new perspective. By thoughtfully answering their questions, you help them navigate their path more effectively.
Build Trust: When mentees feel comfortable asking questions, it helps build trust in the mentoring relationship. They see you as a reliable source of wisdom and support, which encourages them to open up more about their needs and aspirations.
Types of Questions Mentees Might Ask
Life Decisions: A mentee may ask for advice on big choices, like choosing a career path or dealing with personal challenges. They value your opinion and trust that you will help them make the right decision.
Example: “Should I pursue this new job opportunity or stay in my current role?”
Skills and Knowledge: Mentees might want to know how to improve their skills or gain new knowledge. They rely on your experience to guide them.
Example: “How can I get better at public speaking?”
Personal Development: Sometimes, mentees seek advice on how to grow as individuals. They might ask about building confidence, handling stress, or improving relationships.
Example: “How can I manage my time better and reduce stress?”
Problem-Solving: Mentees often face challenges and look to their mentors for solutions. Your experience can help them navigate difficult situations.
Example: “What should I do if I have a conflict with a coworker?”
Feed-forward: A mentee might ask for feedback on their work or behavior. They want to know what they are doing well and where they can improve.
Example: “Can you give me feedback on my recent presentation?”
Wholeheartedness Linked with Mentoring
Wholeheartedness means giving your full attention, energy, and sincerity to something. For mentoring, being wholehearted is crucial. It means you are fully engaged with your mentee, truly care about their progress, and commit to their development.
What does wholeheartedness look like in mentoring?
1. Give Your Full Attention
Listen Consciously: When your mentee asks a question, it’s important to listen caringly. Don’t just hear the words; understand the feelings and thoughts behind them. This shows your mentee their concerns matter to you.
Limit Distractions: When you are with your mentee, put away your phone and avoid interruptions. Give them your full focus. This helps build trust and makes the mentee feel valued.
Remain Present: Engage with your mentee during your meetings or conversations. Show interest in what they are saying by nodding, making eye contact, and responding thoughtfully.
2. Show Genuine Effort
Prepare for Sessions: Think about what your mentee needs and how you can help them. This might include reading up on topics they are interested in or bringing resources that could be useful to them.
Provide Feed-forward: Give practical feed-forward that helps your mentee improve. Be honest AND kind, and focus on how they can grow. Your goal is to support their development, not just to point out mistakes.
Follow Up: After your sessions, follow up on questions or topics discussed. This shows that you remember and care about their progress even outside of your regular meetings.
3. Care About Their Growth
Value Their Goals//Outcomes: Learn what your mentee wants to achieve. Whether it’s a skill, they want to develop or a career path they are exploring, understanding their goals/outcomes helps you tailor your guidance to their requirements.
Walk With Them: Mentees might feel discouraged or uncertain. Be there to lift their spirits. Offer words of encouragement and remind them of their strengths and potential.
Celebrate Successes: When your mentee achieves a goal or makes progress, celebrate with them. Recognize their hard work and achievements. This boosts their confidence and motivates them to keep going.
4. Be Sincere and Honest
Share Your Experiences: Be open about your own experiences. Share what you have learned from your successes and failures. Your honesty can provide valuable lessons and make your mentee feel more comfortable sharing their own challenges.
Admit When You Don’t Know: If you don’t have an answer to a question, be honest about it. You can help your mentee find the answer together. This shows humility and sets a good example for them.
Build Trust: Be consistent and reliable. Keep your promises and respect your mentee’s confidentiality. Trust is the foundation of a strong mentoring relationship.
5. Support Their Independence
Nurture Issue Inquiry: Instead of always giving direct answers, encourage your mentee to think through issues. Ask guiding questions that help them come to their own conclusions. This builds their confidence and inquiry skills.
Support Them: Help your mentee develop the skills they need to become independent. Whether it’s decision-making, time (action) management, or communication, encourage them to take charge of their own growth.
Let Them Lead: Give your mentee opportunities to lead discussions or projects. This allows them to practice and develop leadership skills under your guidance.
Wholehearted Answers Framed by Love and Light Guide the Mentee Forward
Answers with Love: When you answer with love, you show you care deeply about the mentee’s well-being. This means being kind and valuing. Love-based answers are supportive and encourage the mentee to feel respected.
Answers with Light: Light brings clarity and helps the mentee see the way forward. When you provide answers filled with light, you are offering clear, insightful guidance that illuminates the path ahead. This kind of response helps the mentee understand their options and make informed decisions.
Inspiring Confidence: Answers framed by love and light build the mentee’s confidence. They feel supported and capable of tackling their challenges. Such answers solve immediate issues AND encourage the mentee to grow and develop independently.
Mentoring Improves with Practice
Develop Better Skills: Mentoring is a skill that improves with practice. The more you engage in mentoring, the better you become at understanding and supporting others. Experience helps you learn how to provide more effective guidance and develop deeper connections with your mentees.
Become Wiser: As you practice mentoring, you gain wisdom. You learn from the experiences of mentoring different individuals and adapt your approach to meet their unique needs. This wisdom enhances your ability to mentor effectively.
Grow Kinder: Regular mentoring helps you become kinder and more empathetic. You develop a better understanding of people’s challenges and learn to respond with greater compassion. This kindness enriches both your life and the lives of those you mentor.
Mentoring Is a Rewarding Way of Being You – Fully Human
Shared Experience: Mentoring allows you to share your experiences and knowledge with others. By doing so, you help mentees avoid common pitfalls and make informed choices, enriching their lives and careers.
Fulfil Role: Being a mentor is fulfilling because it gives you a sense of purpose. You see the impact of your guidance on the mentee’s growth and success, which brings a deep sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.
Express Humanity: Through mentoring, you express your humanity. Helping others achieve their potential and overcome challenges is a profound way to connect with and contribute to the lives of others. It shows that you care about the well-being and success of those around you.
Grow Connection: Mentoring creates a strong bond between mentor and mentee. When you build this connection on trust, respect, and mutual growth, it enriches both parties, making the mentoring relationship a valuable and rewarding experience. It brings new perspectives, learning opportunities, and a sense of community.?
Moving Forward:
Answering questions wholeheartedly in a mentoring relationship is an eloquent way to make a lasting impact. And so:
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Resources/Videos
YT_Long_YOE: Use Legacy Blueprint to Live a Hale and Hearty Life while Aging Confidently
Aging confidently means living a vibrant, fulfilling life.
领英推荐
A "Legacy Blueprint" can guide you to a hale (healthy) and hearty (joyful) life.
This blueprint combines wealth of evidence, wellth of experience, and health of education.
YT_Shorts_YOE: Aging to Include Thriving Requires Practice
Growing older doesn’t mean just surviving; it’s about thriving.
Whether you’re living alone or with others, thriving requires effort and practice.
Thriving while aging via walking solo or with others.
YT_Shorts_YOE: The Possibility of the Neighborhood
Join the Fairs and Festivities of Aging Confidently Where You Live [and Virtually] & Support the Heart of Community = “Education”
Blog: Evolve Tomorrow's Leaders Through Mentoring: Succession Development Approach
Use mentoring as a succession development tool and technique to support senior workers in sharing their knowledge and skills before they leave the organization of work. Therefore, Improve - Focus - Strengthen Succession Development “Planning - Managing - Leading - Evaluating”
YT_Shorts_YOE: What is the Meaning of Wellth Including Wealth and Health
Health is about personal well-being, better equipped to help others.
Wealth is about using resources wisely, contributing to community welfare.
Wellth is about integrating health and wealth for a balanced, fulfilling life.
YT_Long_IMC: Evolve Tomorrow's Leaders Through Mentoring: Succession Development
Use mentoring as a succession development tool and technique to support senior workers in sharing their knowledge and skills before they leave the organization of work.
YT_Shorts_WLTV: What Will You Continue, Stop, and Start Today?
To continue - what is contributing_
To stop - what is not working_
To start - what will add zest to living life, soloaging confidently?
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Raise the Bar by Living Your Legacy Life
When we up the ante, raise the bar, set a higher standard like living a legacy life, doing so encourages us to exceed the minimum.
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Legacy Is in You to Gift Encouragement ((5 of 5))
to Get Movement as you gain:
_Dynamic Growth
__Momentum
__Inspiration
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Legacy Is in You to Gift Effort ((4 of 5))
to Get Results as you gain:
_Achievement
__Satisfaction
___Recognition
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Legacy Is in You to Gift Support ((3 of 5))
to Get Support as you gain:
_Reciprocal Help
__Shared Strength
___Optimistic Feed-forward
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Legacy is In You to Gift Clarity ((2 of 5))
to Get Clear as you gain:
_Self-Reflection?
__Focus
___Mutual Clarity
YT_Shorts_WLTV: Legacy is in You to Gift Perspective ((1 of 5))
to Get Perspective as you gain:
_Broader View
__Empathy
___Wisdom Exchange
Blog: Legacy Is In You To Gift: Read//Watch 5 Legacy Gift to Get statements?
They are heart to head/hands outcomes of your willingness, your readiness to "loverage" your mentoring as a gift for others.?
They are expressive exchanges using your experiences to benefit others.?
Statements like: Gift Perspective to Get Perspective; Gift Clarity to Get Clear!
Certified Prosci Change Manager | Learning & Dev. Consult.(virtual/in-class courses) | Certified Master Executive Coach | Leadership Dev. Expert | Certified DISC Behavior Coach
4 个月Hi Dr. Hobbs, Thanks a million for these newsletters! As one of your doctoral mentees, I can say that you walk the talk. You are an excellent mentor who has taught me how to mentor others during their dissertation process. I am one of your doctoral legacy mentees, who has achieved above and beyond due to your effective mentorship and positive communication. You spoke life into me and allowed me to realize what I needed to do to complete my dissertation and achieve my Ph.D., which will never be forgotten. Your newsletters definitely provide education, clarity, motivation, and empowerment on how to be a more effective mentor. Again, thank you for your continuous education!
Mental Health and Wellness Support | I Develop Effective Mentoring Programs for Executives and Leaders to Create Safe Workplaces and Thriving Environments for Employees | International Mentor | Speaker| Author
4 个月Type of Questions: Having learned the hard way, you need to help them make a decision and NOT make the decision for them. If you do you shift accountability for the outcome to you and not your mentee.