Mental Techniques for Dealing Away With Worry

Focus on today

“Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.” – Thomas Carlyle

Thinking about what needs to be done in the future can lead to overwhelm and inaction. But if you focus on what you need to accomplish today, it’s much more doable. It will help you create the future you want, one day at a time.

A formula to follow

Frameworks for dealing with worry can be helpful, especially since worry destroys our ability to concentrate. Without being able to concentrate, not only do we feel worse, but we’re less effective.

If you have a situation where you’re worrying about failing, follow these three steps.

• Step 1: Analyze a situation causing you worry to determine the worst possible scenario if you fail.
• Step 2: Accept the worst possible case scenario, if it is to happen.
• Step 3: Focus on trying to improve the situation so that you end up with a better outcome than worst case.

Why you should care about worry

“The greatest mistake physicians make is that they attempt to cure the body without attempting to cure the mind; yet the mind and body are one and should not be treated separately.” – Plato

Worry isn’t just something that makes you feel a little worse or makes it less likely that you can concentrate. It’s something that can lead to seriously adverse health effects for your mind, body, and soul. These negative effects can cause much worse situations with your health than whatever it is that you’re worrying about.

In short, worry is not worth the physical toll it can take on your body.

Techniques For Analyzing Worry

Understand the situation

Whenever you’re worrying about something, you need to do three things:

1. Get the facts.
2. Analyze the facts.
3. Arrive at a decision – and act on that decision.

One simple framework for figuring this all out is to follow four lines of inquiry.

1. Write down what you’re worrying about (What am I worrying about?)
2. Think about what you can do about it (What can I do about it?)
3. Decide on what to do (What are you going to do about it?)
4. Start carrying out the decision (When am I going to start doing it?)

This framework helps you get out of your head. It allows you to quickly understand what’s going on, what you can do about it, and to make a decision and start doing what you’ve decided.

Solving business problems

Similar to the framework above for analyzing any worry, you can use the following four questions to solve most of your worry about any business situation.

1. What’s the problem?
2. What is the cause of the problem?
3. What are all possible solutions to the problem?
4. What solution do you suggest?

Whenever you’re struggling in business, go through this framework. You’ll feel better and be clear on what you’re going to do to start actually solving the problem, instead of simply worrying about it.

Breaking The Worry Habit

Use busyness

To conquer worry, you need to understand that worry is a habit. That means it’s a habit you can break. One technique for breaking the worry habit is to keep yourself busy. When you’re really busy or taken up by action, it’s hard to worry. There’s a balance here – you don’t want to mask underlying problems by just keeping yourself moving all the time. But filling up your days can make it easier to not worry.

Don’t sweat the small stuff or the improbable

“Trivialities are at the bottom of most marital unhappiness” – Joseph Sabath

Don’t let the little annoyances or problems in life cause you too much worry. You can’t eliminate everything that’s unpleasant, and the energy expended on worrying about these problems prevents you from focusing on what’s important.

On a related note, don’t get too concerned about things that don’t have a high probability of happening. Most surfers fear sharks, but how likely is it that they’ll get killed by one? Not that likely. Try to ask yourself honestly, “How likely is it that the thing I’m worrying about will occur?”

Accept the situation

“God grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can; And the wisdom to know the difference.”

We often find ourselves in situations we don’t want to be in. Focus on what you can do about the situation, rather than on the existence of the source of worry.

Know your values

“Yes, I honestly believe that this is one of the greatest secrets to true peace of mind – a decent set of values. And I believe we could annihilate fifty per cent of all our worries at once if we would develop a a sort of private gold standard – a gold standard of what things are worth to us in terms of our lives.”

Get clear on what you value, and live by that standard. Hold others to your standards as well. If you have a friend who’s always an hour late, say that you’re willing to wait up to 10 minutes, but after that, you’re leaving. That’s a standard that you’ve communicated, and the person can choose to meet it or not.

Figure out what you really care about in life and what you’re willing to give up to get it. You may find that you’re expending a lot of energy on something you don’t even want. Cut it if it doesn’t align with your values.