Mental Illness - In My Own Words

Years ago, I was asked, “Tell me about yourself”

In My Own Words, I said…….

I am Sister, Friend, Volunteer, Philanthropist, Confidante, International Model, I am caring, empathetic, thoughtful, amazing and all those great things you see. But, there is something you cannot see. Some mornings, I can’t get out of bed, I often feel like am drowning, I feel like am being pushed into my grave.

In those times, don’t judge me, don’t fire me. Be patient with me. Don’t tell me to get over it. Don’t ask "what’s wrong with you", rather ask me what happened. I suffered from depression; a form of mental illness. Just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not REAL.

My story is not unique. According to the Canadian Mental Health Association, in any given year, one in five people in Canada will personally experience a mental health problem or illness. By age 40, about 50% of the population will have had a mental illness. Quite often people use mental health and mental illness interchangeably. They differ in definition. We all have mental health. Just like we have physical health and spiritual health. It can be either positive or negative. As per Wikipedia “Mental illness refers to a wide range of mental health conditions — disorders that affect your mood, thinking and behavior. Examples of mental illness include depression, anxiety disorders, schizophrenia, eating disorders and addictive behaviors”

When people find out that you have mental illness, often stereotype and stigma cloud their perception. When we see people as one thing over and over and over again, that’s what they become. It becomes a single story. Single stories rob people of their dignity. In her Ted Talk presentation, a young Nigerian storyteller named Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie explains the danger of a single story. She talks about when we’re unwilling to connect with others and listen to their stories, we limit the possibility of connecting with them. We become aloof and are prone to a simplistic pity, seeing others merely as flattened stereotypes. And the problem with stereotypes? Adichie says it’s “not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.”

Imagine if you may, two patients walk into the emergency hospital complaining about nausea and chest pain. They are both examined. One gets cardiac treatment. The other is sent home. The one sent home suffers from depression. Sometimes it’s difficult to determine from which mental illness a patient suffers. It can be left untreated for a long time. The second leading cause of death in young people is suicide. The research into developmental neurobiology is inadequately supported and the stigma of mental illness adds to the challenge. Early intervention is key. I describe my past mental health as wearing one high heel and one flat slipper. One foot is excited, and happy ready to take on any challenges in front of it. The other foot simply does not want to get out of bed. What’s worse is when l felt sad when everything else was going so well and I had no idea why. l walked with one high heel and one flat slipper. While it visually looks uncomfortable, try living it.

My final thoughts: to the legal system, stop criminalizing mental illnesses; to the entertainment and media world, portray characters with mental illnesses as positive characters and don’t just focus on the diagnosis.

What if you knew that your neighbor, who is a president of a successful business, suffers from mental illness?

What if you knew your daughter’s best friend suffered from anorexia?

What if you knew your son had thoughts of suicide because he was being bullied online and offline?

What if you dared to care?

Don't tell me what people have said about you, tell me about yourself “In Your Own Words”.

Harriet Tinka, BBA, CPA, CMA, CCP

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