Mental Health

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/19/well/mind/covid-mental-health-languishing.html

I’m posting this because over the last year I’ve witnessed a lot of friends and co-workers that are dealing with mental health issues. A common trait is thinking it’s some kind of weakness and that you’re alone in feeling this way. That couldn’t be further from the truth, this year has been traumatizing for a lot of us. The first step in dealing with it is identifying it and discussing it.  I’ve seen how liberating that can be for people.  Don’t bottle it all up because it’s only a matter of time till it catches up with you. By no means am I a mental health expert, just sharing from personal experience.  

We are all coming out of the last year of lockdowns wanting to make big changes, which could be the result of a lot of introspection or an effort to distance ourselves from the trauma of this past year.  Getting back into the swing of things and executing on that can be overwhelming. The gap between where you want to be and where you are today can lead to anxiety. Seeing other people allegedly “thriving” on social media doesn’t help either.  This is what I do and I hope it could be helpful to others. 

Start by writing out your goals. Where do you want to be 6 months, 1 year or 3 years from now. You need some sort of a North Star to drive towards. Don’t get lost in the details of how you get there, but list out a high level framework for some of the things that need to happen in order for you to get there.  

Next, get moving. This won’t happen overnight, but start making small changes in your life that are healthy and constructive, any little thing will give you some momentum and from there you can start tackling the bigger things.  It could be as simple as taking walks everyday, reading 10 pages, dieting, meditating, etc... start small and build a new habit. You need healthy habits that will be your rock and you can always fall back on when things get tough.  

Once you’re able to do this for a week or two you’ll start to feel better about yourself because you’re making changes! You can continue to build on those habits and tackle new ones, which over time should be more and more connected with your goals. Be accountable to yourself, how are you doing vs the framework you created at the start. What adjustments need to be made?  

One last thing, don’t get lost in what others are doing. It’s so hard these days but it’s the easiest way to make yourself unhappy.  I personally struggle with this the most.  One of my favorite quotes is “Comparison is the thief of joy.” I have to remind myself of that everyday. 

It’s important to remember that a lot of this anxiety comes from some fear about the future and where you might be. If you’re always trying to figure out if the future is going to be good or bad you’re never in the now and, in most cases, the now isn’t that bad. Things are better than you might be giving them credit for.  

Two exercises, think back to some things that you were really worried about at different points in the last few years. Think about the stress and anxiety you put yourself through vs how bad it actually was. Are you even thinking about them today? There’s so much stuff we’ve all stressed over that we don’t even remember anymore. It’s an endless cycle and you need to break it. Things you’re worried about will usually not be as bad as you’re making them in your mind right now.  

On the flip side, think of some of the most consequential moments in your life. People ore events that came into your life and changed your path and helped define you. How many of those happened because you sat there and planned it all out? For me it’s close to zero, which might come as a surprise because I’m an entrepreneur/CEO and supposed to be planning things. You need that North Star and some framework but more than anything you need to leave some room for the universe to do it’s thing. If you have faith in that, combined with the healthy habits, you’ll naturally relax.  

Like I said, I’m no expert but this has worked for me and if it’s helpful to even one person it was worth it.