Mental Health Awareness Week

I posted this piece last year as part of Mental Health Awareness Week and then freaked out when it got traction beyond what I was expecting. Today, I'm reposting, with an update below.

___

It's Mental Health Awareness Week and, by coincidence, I just finished an 8-week counselling programme courtesy of the NHS. Yay! I'm cured.

Joke!... I am slowly starting to realise that mental health is like physical health - a diet can work in the short term, but long term you need to make a conscious and concerted effort to maintain good habits to try to manage it.

So, trying to think about what mental health "awareness" actually means, here are some things that help me that may also be helpful for others in raising awareness of their own mental health, or supporting others.

Your Mental Health

If it's a Big Deal to you, it's a Big Deal

I didn't feel like my problems were big enough to allow me to ask for help, especially from our under-pressure NHS. Yes, things were a bit crap but compared some other people I was still very lucky and I didn't feel like my problems justified NHS intervention. After months of what I can only really describe as bleakness I ended up going to my doctor, resigned to the fact I'd need to figure out a way to pay for private therapy, but at least looking for some advice on how to find someone decent and who would be a good match for me.

My doctor, the referral specialist and my counsellor all stressed one important thing - if something is a big deal for you, it's a Big Deal. We're aren't playing 'Top Trumps' for sadness here. If you feel sad or bleak to an extent that is affecting your ability to live your life then that is a Big Deal and you are entitled to ask for help. Depending on where you live you might have to wait, but in Glasgow I was sitting in front of an amazing individual counsellor within a month of visiting my GP but I actually noticed an improvement in my mood even during that month of waiting because I knew help was on the way.

NHS GGC Wellbeing Services are Great

All you hear about in the media is how long people have to wait, and how bad the support is when they get there and that's quite off putting but my own experience was the polar opposite. My GP took me seriously (more seriously maybe than I took myself) and I had a referral call a couple of weeks later. I thought that would be stressful because they call you with no notice and I work in an open office, but if you miss the call you can ring back and leave a message with preferred times and they'll make every effort to call you then.

My counsellor was - like all the medical staff I encounter these days! - really young but so amazing. Accommodating, kind but also good at challenging me and encouraging me to work through the programme even when it seemed like unpicking my issues was only going to make things worse rather than better.

It's Never Over

It's actually quite exhausting to think that I will always have to be vigilant about my mental health. In the same way that I know that weeks of takeaways and no exercise will result in me putting on weight, weeks of not paying attention to the skills I've learned in my counselling will have consequences.

Mental Health at Work

For me, work was a welcome distraction but I did tell my manager what was going on fairly on. Partly for practical reasons so I could attend sessions during the working day but I was also aware that although I *thought* I was fine at work I may not have been seeing myself as clearly as I thought. We have a very good relationship and it was an easy conversation for me to have, but I know some might not be so lucky.

My manager was, and continues to be, very supportive and this has made a huge difference to me so it may be useful for others to know what that looked like for us.

Trust The Person

I have a lot on at work, always have and that's the way I like it. I've never liked roles where it's business as usual - the challenge and uncertainty of new projects and opportunities is what gets me out of bed. My manager asked me what I needed from her and then did exactly that. For me, it was to keep on giving me interesting projects and good work. I didn't want to be 'protected', and for us the deal was that work would continue as normal, but if my capacity to cope changed I'd say.

Confidentiality

So, this is a tricky one and while we are talking more about mental health as a society (it's MH Awareness week after all) there are still issues for people in talking about their own mental health and what they are going through in that moment. In my opinion, it's important that the person with the issue feels like they are in control of what information is released. For me, the thought of other people talking about me, or feeling sorry for me would have exacerbated things so I wanted to keep it under my hat and my manager respected that.

**Update, I felt I was ready when I originally posted this article, then freaked out and deleted it so realised that I wasn't as ready as I perhaps thought. It reiterates my belief that this is a convoluted, personal journey the pace of which should be dictated by the person themselves**

Practical Support

Not having to worry about asking for time off during the day, having the ability to use my flexi time for appointments (I was offered work time but preferred not to; again my choice and I'm grateful I wasn't pushed down one way or the other) - practical things made a huge difference in allowing me to accommodate my sessions as well as fulfilling my obligations at work and home without feeling pulled in all sorts of directions.

So, that's it. I feel like I have turned a corner and I don't know what's ahead. But now at least there is a possibility that what's ahead might actually be good. The counselling has given me if not a map, then a compass with which to navigate this new world and I'd urge anyone else who's struggling to speak to their GP or other medical professional.

_____

As for today, this all seems very relevant for me still. Being mindful of my mental health will always be part of my life. I have had ups and downs over the past year but have been able to manage them better than I would have before counselling. In fact, I continue to see a counsellor weekly and even on those days I think I'll have nothing to say I end the conversation with a different perspective on something.

Lockdown was doubly hard coinciding as it did with some personal changes but 8 weeks in and the tools and practises I've spent the last year honing are really proving useful and I'm so glad that I took the step to ask for help 15 months ago. If you are struggling with some aspect of your mental health, I would urge you to please, please raise the flag with someone you trust and start taking steps, at your own pace, to find out what will work for you.

Useful links (not endorsements, just things I've found useful)

https://wellbeing-glasgow.org.uk

www.betterhelp.com