The Menendez Brothers, My Story, and the Untold Abuse in the Boy Scouts: A Call for Accountability

After more than 30 years, the Menendez brothers' trial is back in the news, and for those of us who lived through our own trauma, it’s impossible to hear their story without feeling echoes of our own pain. Their trial wasn’t just something I watched on TV—it brought me back to my own experiences of abuse as a Boy Scout in New Rochelle, New York. When Lyle and Erik Menendez claimed they had been abused by their father, I believed them. I knew too well the devastation they felt, the anger that simmered inside, and the overwhelming desire for revenge.

I grew up in the Boy Scouts, a place that was supposed to be about honor, leadership, and integrity. But my experience was far from that ideal. My scoutmaster didn’t just abuse me—he introduced me to 11 other men who continued the cycle of horror. The Menendez brothers’ story triggered me deeply, forcing me to confront my own abuse. Just like the Menendez brothers, I wanted to confront my abuser, Lonnie Barnes. I dreamed of killing him.

One day, on a trip home, years after I’d left New Rochelle, the Boy Scouts, and Mr. Barnes behind, I found myself standing outside Lonnie G. Barnes’ door, ready to make him pay for what he had done. But instead of letting myself in and stabbing him with my Scout knife, I turned around, drove straight to the New Rochelle police station, and filed a complaint. That decision changed everything. When the police confronted him, Barnes confessed. I read the report over and over, unable to believe that my abuser had finally admitted to what he had done.

My book in progress,?Heart Warrior: How I Survived Sexual Assault in Foster Care and the Boy Scouts, details my abuse in the foster system and the American Boy Scouts as well as that fateful moment when, thankfully, I turned to justice rather than revenge. My journey is also documented in the Hulu film?Leave No Trace, which investigates a century-long cover-up inside one of America’s most trusted institutions and tells the story of 82,000 men—yes, you read that right—who filed complaints against the Boy Scouts of America for the abuse they endured and won the prestigious duPont-Columbia University Award in 2023. Heart Warrior and Leave No Trace don’t just tell my story; they tell the stories of those 82,000 survives and of the countless men who didn’t file complaints against the American Boy Scouts. These stories must be told, and they must be heard, and there must be a public reckoning for the institutions that allowed this abuse to flourish.

Like the Menendez brothers, we were victims of adults who should have protected us. While the $2.4billion in damages granted us by the courts was the largest class action lawsuit settlement in US history and brought a measure of relief to we survivors where, ultimately, is accountability for the Boy Scouts? Where are the congressional hearings? Where is the healing?

Congress held hearings for the abuse survivors of USA Gymnastics. The Menendez brothers had their trial and, now, thirty years after the fact, their case is being reexamined. Congress has even held hearings over?Taylor Swift concert tickets, yet they remain silent on the issue of child abuse within one of the nation's most revered organizations. Let that sink in for a moment. They held hearings over concert tickets, but they haven’t held hearings for 82,000 men who were victims of abuse. ?What is being protected here? Who is being protected?

The Boy Scouts have reorganized and filed for bankruptcy, but that doesn’t mean the story is over. It doesn’t mean the abuse will never happen again. We need to ask the hard questions: What is the level of accountability necessary to prevent this from happening again? Why haven’t our elected officials brought this issue to the forefront? How many more boys need to suffer before we see action? How is it that our communities—be they the Boy Scouts, the Catholic Church, the foster care system—continue to fail us, time and time again

The Menendez brothers deserve to be heard. They suffered as children, and no adult protected them. Their cries for help were ignored, much like the cries of the 82,000 men who filed complaints against the Boy Scouts. We cannot let these stories fade into the background yet again.

In 1916, Congress granted the Boy Scouts a rare Congressional Charter, effectively giving them a monopoly and an implied governmental seal of approval. This charter means that Congress has oversight responsibility. That’s right. The very charter, the very organizing principle behind the American Boy Scouts means Congress has the responsibility and power to make change from within. Yet they have done nothing.

Congress: Do your job. Do the right thing. Do what we citizens of these United States have elected you to do. Hold hearings. Bring justice. Ensure no child is ever harmed again by the Boy Scouts of America.

About the Author: Dr. Stuart C. Lord

Dr. Stuart C. Lord is a recognized expert in leadership development and organizational health, serving as the CEO of Delta Developmental and Y Solve Foundry. With over 30 years of experience, he has dedicated his career to enhancing leadership capacities in higher education, non-profit organizations, and social impact sectors. His work with Y Solve is focused on launching and scaling social impact companies that combine ethical leadership with financial sustainability, aiming to transform communities through innovative approaches. Dr. Lord’s leadership philosophy integrates servant leadership, ethical practices, and strategic problem-solving, fostering environments that promote continuous growth and effective governance. His career reflects a deep commitment to empowering leaders who excel in dynamic environments and work for the common good.