Men VS Women

Writing this makes me feel really old and grouchy but it has to be said. The world that we live in today seems to want to pit us against one another all the time. While writing my last book I was doing a lot of youtube research to write a particularly misogynistic character. This ended up polluting my feed with videos supporting my new worldview according to the YouTube algorithm. I was now being bombarded with videos not just on YouTube but on Instagram, Facebook and even Amazon. Names such as Andrew Tate, Jordan Peterson and Ben Shapiro became familiar to me. Their views which were completely unknown to me suddenly started becoming my own. Videos of young, beautiful women telling the host of some video or another that they would never get with a man under 6 foot without a 6 pack and a man who wasn’t earning 6 figures stabbed me where it hurt. As a 5’6 man, this made me mad! How dare they speak this way about ME??

I work as a Sports Massage Therapist and speak to lots of different people. With all of these things running through my mind I felt I needed to hear the other side of the story. One client who has always been very open and honest with me about her life and views was happy to tell me her side. We are of similar age and both single and on the apps. What she told me really opened my eyes to the trap we were both trapped in. She said that the videos that populated her feed spoke about men as sex-hungry, unfeeling brutes who just want to use women for sex and then move on generally to someone younger. That night I went home and I looked at the opposite argument and the algorithms fought me every step of the way. Showing me video suggestions for “Feminist gets owned” or “A world without men” anything to distract me from leaving the box they had me in. The other side of the story is equally sad and lonely. Videos of men degrading women, men telling women if they are not beautiful they are worth nothing.

All of these videos have a level of reality and truth to them. They wouldn’t work if they didn’t. This gives rise to people who say the wrong things at the right time. Giving people fuel to their fire. Don’t get married because your wife will leave you and take everything you have worked so hard for, your husband is definitely cheating on you! These things affect us on a much deeper level. The trust we have for those we love starts to fray. Owners of dating apps and self-help videos from these so-called gurus are the only people who benefit from pitting us against each other. People have never been this lonely and depressed even though we are more connected than ever before.?

I wish I had the answer to how to improve the situation. My best advice is that no one is your enemy, and see the best in people of course there will be people in the world that hurt you but don’t let that turn you cold. Social Media has the word MEDIA in there for a reason. Don’t believe everything you read, see or hear in the media.?

#menvswomen #socialmedia #moderndating