Memories are Made When you Give

We do not remember days; we remember moments.

Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.

Have you ever wondered how much of love is about the heart… and how much is about hormones?

Whether love at first sight really exists… or is just something Hollywood / Bollywood conjured up?

And what about chemistry—can you create it, or does it just happen?

Most of us have pondered such issues.

Why do we fall in love?

I’ve come to think that romantic love is one of three basic brain systems that evolved for reproduction. Each evolved for a reason: The sex drive evolved to get you out there looking for partners. Romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your energy on just one person at a time, conserving time and energy. And attachment, the feeling of security you can feel with a long-term partner, evolved to help you stay together long enough to raise kids.

Being in love feel so good?

Because some of the most powerful brain circuits for pleasure are triggered. The main chemical involved is dopamine, which produces feelings of euphoria, energy, sleeplessness, and focused attention on your beloved. Biologically speaking, you’re experiencing something similar to a drug high.

It’s easier to approach someone when you have something to give.

You tend to feel a little more awkward and hesitant to approach a stranger when there’s something you want.

Imagine you’re sitting in an airport, waiting for your flight to board. In the same waiting area there’s an attractive, eligible-looking man sitting nearby. Score!

The presence of an attractive man is one thing; finding an easy way to start a conversation with him is another.

Imagine he gets up to board the plane, and you notice he left his cell phone behind.

Suddenly, approaching him becomes very easy. You have something to give. You are the giver. In that role, you feel relaxed and confident about catching his attention.

It’s very different when you start with something you want.

You get all hot and sweaty trying to think up a good excuse for striking up a conversation. The fear is that he will see through you and know what you want. You’re not ready to reveal that level of interest. You feel awkward.

Being irresistible means practicing the mental states that cause others to feel drawn to you. So I want to encourage you to get into a particular frame of mind more often. I’m talking about the frame of mind of someone who is a giver.

It reverses the human tendency to automatically make judgments about other people all day long. My human mind automatically judges other people .I may judge the way they style their hair, how tall or short they are, whether they seem to be more attractive than me or less attractive than me. Do they seem more affluent than me, or less?

All that judging is stressful on the human soul. It leaves me either feeling superior to others or inferior to others. I find neither position helpful.

When I catch myself judging someone else, it now serves as my automatic reminder to send a blessing. I become a giver. When I become a giver, there’s a subtle change in the way I walk. There’s a subtle gentleness, a sort of kindness in my eyes.

It could be entirely in my imagination, but I believe I exude warmth when I am succeeding at adopting the role of a giver. You may or may not have read some of the interesting research studies about the way simple prayers can positively impact the course of events for patients in hospitals.

I was once employed as a research assistant for a meta-analysis of a lot of those studies. It was interesting, but kind of odd to me To me, it seems an intercessory prayer is something spiritual, not something you are likely to succeed at measuring with scientific methods.

Nonetheless, astonishing results have been documented. Positive intentions and mental blessings seem to do something that science can measure. Regardless of whether that is actually true, the mental act of sending a blessing puts you in the role of a giver.

And that has real power.

There is such a thing as love at first sight?

Yes. It probably happens to men more than women because men are more visual, but I think we can all remember times when we felt an instant attraction to someone we barely knew. It has a practical purpose: In the animal kingdom you can’t spend three months discussing your résumé; you need to feel instant sparks to start the breeding process.

Is falling in love all about timing?

Timing is important. The perfect partner can sit right next to you at a party, and you might not notice him or her if you’re too busy at work, enmeshed in another relationship, or otherwise preoccupied. But if you’ve just moved to a new city, recovered from an unsatisfying love affair, begun to make enough money to raise a family, are suffering through a difficult experience, or have a good deal of spare time, you are ripe to fall in love.

Is there anything we can do to make someone fall for us (or make ourselves fall for someone)?

Do new things together. Novelty and excitement all drive up the activity of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. These neurotransmitters are associated with energy, elation, focused attention and motivation—central traits of romantic love. So as you do novel things, these chemicals hop into action and may just push you over the threshold to fall in love.

Every one's memory is his / her private literature.

Your Memories….?

Disclaimer:

The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice .All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensue discussion or debate.

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