Memories of Christmas

The following is a story I wrote recently reflecting upon past Christmas experiences growing up in Charlestown, MA.??

My specific memories may be unique to me but many longtime friends and neighbors share similar experiences of growing up back in the day when things were quite different than today. Perhaps you have similar memories of “simpler” times when it was okay to celebrate Christmas.?

To individuals such as yours truly and those who grew up in Charlestown-the upcoming Christmas season heralded the arrival of Jesus, the son of God. We were raised to go to church (St. Catherine’s in my case) during the Christmas season, to gather with family and friends, shop for an "evergreen" tree real or otherwise, exchange gifts and to celebrate with loved ones.

My closest friends and I grew up in the Bunker Hill housing projects a thousand unit plus development and we experienced so many great memories there where I spent the first 23 years of my life. Beyond the projects. I have so many awesome Christmas memories of gathering at Nana Flanagan’s in Dorchester, buying a tree from the vendor who sold them in front of the cemetery on Bunker Hill Street and opening presents under the tree at 17 Carney Court first alone and later with baby sister Patsy.

I remember leaving cookies out for Santa while wondering how he would get to our apartment since we did not have those fancy chimneys, visiting Santa's Village at Jordan Marsh (Macy’s) and watching the model Lionel train displays.

Memories of listening to Mom's Johnny Mathis Christmas albums, Paul Sullivan placing a tree on the ledge at 17 right outside my window, spraying stencils on the windows with faux snow. So many more awesome memories are also near and dear so many years later.

The day my best friend Arthur told me in the Courtyard behind 9 and 17 Carney that there ain’t no Santy Claus after the Nuns at St. Catherine told him thereby ruining his day, my day and our mutual beliefs. Life was never the same after hearing that devastating news about Santa.

I remember the morning Mikey and I sat on the gritty, concrete steps of 17 Carney playing with the dolls Santy brought us. Hold on, not Barbie but instead G. I. Joe with 101 moveable parts. Back in those days we would journey to 1777 Dot Ave, Dorchester in Uncle Herbie's car to Nana Flanagan’s.?

Early on the family gatherings included Great grandma Millie, Nana Charlotte, My Mom Patsy, Uncle Leo and Great Uncles Herbie, Bobby and Irving and later Papa Tom. And even later little sister Patsy joined us when I was 9 years old.?

About 20 years ago I was at the South Boston St. Patrick's Day Political Breakfast and an old Charlestown friend of my late Mom’s approached me. The woman told me of the year my mother helped her family out during a time of dire need. According to that friend she did not have any money, could barely put food on the table and that year would not be able to buy a tree or presents for her young daughter. Apparently, my Mom who had little herself brought that woman to Bunker Hill Street and bought her a tree and then ornaments and gifts... I got choked up when I heard that story but that was my mother and all our Charlestown mothers, there for one another when times were tough.

Then there were the parties for the needy at the Charlestown Navy Yard sponsored by employees of the then functioning naval shipyard, Rex Trailer performing at those parties, multi-candled candelabra lights in the project windows, feeding the reindeer gumdrops on the Boston Common and the manger scene.

Decorating the tree with lights, ornaments and tinsel. And who could forget the arrival of the aluminum Christmas tree with rotating color wheel, if you are of age of course.

Such wonderful memories but as I got older Christmas evolved for me into spending more time with friends, slugging down beer and Boone's Farm apple wine in the project hallways on Dope Corner or hanging out with dates at their parent's homes. Spending time hanging out with so many of my childhood friends gone way too soon due to violence or drugs. Fortunately, many of my boyhood friends of yesteryear managed to remain friends today though we may not get together that often.

With the passage of time and friend and family members gone way too soon Christmas started becoming a time of both celebrating those still with us and remembering others no longer around. In my case, family members lost too soon began with the passing of Great Grand Mother Millie in 66, Uncle Leo in 72, Nana in 75, my great uncles in between, Ma in 99 and by the year 2000 just about my entire immediate family was gone save for Papa Tom and Patsy.

Fortunately, along the way my children Dave and Evan came along joined by Patsy's daughters Kayla and Hayley. David Flanagan was born on Christmas Eve in 1988 which helped brighten up each Christmas.

Reconnecting with Linda Collings RT(R)(MR)ARRT a few years back and getting to know her family and friends and to make so many new memories has been a Godsend for me. I hope to continue sharing the good and bad times with her, my family and friends as time moves on.

Over the years I have mostly loved and looked forward to Christmas. However, like many the arrival of the holiday season has also been bittersweet with memories of simpler times and the realization that most of my family and many friends have gone and our years ahead limited.

Of course, I am not alone here with mixed feelings towards Christmas and for many it is a time where they are most vulnerable. Like many, I tend to have to balance melancholia and trying to enjoy the holidays with family and friends. In the end I think about how my family members and friends who have passed would want us to continue remembering our memories together regardless of how painful it may be.

Still, I look forward to embracing the holidays, going to see the Boston Pops, donating to various charitable organizations and trying to pay it forward by helping others in need, watching the annual Boston Common or Charlestown tree lightings, gathering with family and friends and watching others smile as they open their gifts and of course gladly accepting gifts from others. If you are in a buying mood I take a 46 regular cut sport jacket, XL sweaters, Johnston and Murphys size 12 but hold off on buying pants for me, that requires a Herculean effort.

Yes, I still love Christmas and know that others may not and still others who do not celebrate for religious or personal reasons. I am aware that some think it has become too “commercialized” and may cause great stress but for me it provides great memories of Christmases and loved ones past that might not otherwise have occurred. It also provides an opportunity to pass on a tradition and create family memories for years to come. Until someone manages to ban Christmas, that is.

Merry Christmas to all who celebrate.

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