Mementos

Do you fear death?

Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but I think about death a lot. My dad is 92 now and frail, and I know that the dreaded phone call could come at any moment.

It's a shadow that hangs over me.

I've been trying lately to more fully understand death and dying from the Stoic perspective. The Stoics saw death as an inevitable part of "nature's will", and a natural part of life's cycle of renewal. Of course, life 2,000 years ago was shorter and more brutish than our modern version, and at a time when a cut finger could kill you, there was much uncertainty as to how much time you will have on this earth.

So the Stoics actively practiced Memento Mori: "Remember you are going to die." It's a reminder of the fragility of life, and the importance of living each day to the fullest:

“Let us prepare our minds as if we’d come to the very end of life. Let us postpone nothing. Let us balance life’s books each day. The one who puts the finishing touches on their life each day is never short of time.” -- Seneca

To me the point here is not to spend precious energy or time worrying about the things in life you have little control over, and that don't matter in any event. That promotion you missed out on? That deal you didn't close? That house you lost out on or can't afford? That rude cashier at the local coffee shop? Memento Mori.

So remember this: We will all die at some point and we can't take any of it with us. None of it matters. What is important is how much you've loved and the depth of your friendships. The respect you show to strangers. The things that matter are not in your bank account. It's in the integrity, courage, honesty and wisdom you apply to your life and the world around you.

As Seneca said, "A life lived well is long enough."

Memento Mori.

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Ken Davenport is the author most recently of The Stoic Transition: A Guide.