"You're meeting a customer?" "But...we had a prior commitment!"

One of my pet hates is being canceled, ghosted, or whatever else you want to call it.

For example, I run sales training and coaching programs, and if a participant, having committed to do so, doesn't attend a session (except for a personal crisis), I think less of them.

Even more so when, after the event, they come up with, 'I'm sorry, I had an important meeting with a customer.' As if that makes it OK.

And so this is an email (OK, rant then) that I typically send out to participants in my programs once a year or so.

Hi (name)

As new people come on board, there comes a time when I need to say this...

It relates to non-participation in the course and 'no-shows' to coaching sessions.

Now, that applies to very few; however, I email everyone because the program relies on mutual support e.g., for practice sessions. We're all impacted by non-participation, so I want you to know my response.

In addition, there is a more general message (lesson) here for anyone intent on being of value to others.

I regard most people, including customers, as peers, and I don't expect them to accommodate me at the drop of a hat, nor do I expect that I should need to do the same for them. As a common courtesy, I respect their time and expect them to respect mine.

That's only reasonable, right?

And so, canceling a commitment, e.g., coaching, at the last minute (evening before or that morning), for an 'urgent meeting with a customer', your boss, or for any reason for that matter, short of a personal or medical emergency, doesn't wash with me as a valid reason.

You learn in this course that trust is the sum of Reliability, Credibility, and Transparency and that Self-Interest kills it. Not meeting a commitment is a strike on all counts.

Being a sales professional is about being trusted. Period. If you aspire to be that and thrive in competitive sales environments, showing up is table stakes. If you can't do that, then you won't make it.

In 40 years as a sales professional, I haven't lost a single sale or brownie point for refusing to break a prior commitment. If anything, I have gained respect. Short of a personal or medical emergency, be it my boss, a customer, or the CEO, there's been no need.

On the other hand, I have had others cancel on me, which impacted my opinion of them. They made me feel unimportant. And I lost trust in them.

I'm not perfect, though, and I've been gutted on the rare occasions I have been the culprit.

As Maya Angelou once said, 'at the end of the day, people may not remember what you did or said, but they will always remember how you made them feel.' The takeaway is, don't let people feel they don't count. If ever I've done that, I feel ashamed of myself.

My experience is also that others, customers included, will respect you (feel good about you) for honoring commitments to others no matter the urgency of their own needs.

They expect the same. Right? Does anyone really expect you to be waiting on their call, ready to drop whatever you have planned to entertain them? And frankly, they'll think less of you for dropping a commitment to see them. Next time, it might be them that gets dropped!

I offer you this counsel not simply to avoid being inconvenienced but as your sales coach with a responsibility to help you grow your sales effectiveness. How people regard you, your reputation and your trustworthiness is the bedrock of that.

No matter how trivial it seems, each failure is a body blow to the trust people have in you and your reputation. You diminish in their eyes.

Never risk it. I can't say it more plainly.

Lest you think me harsh, I'm not asking anything of you that you shouldn't expect of me. You should hold me to the same standard. I made a personal commitment to help you succeed, and I expect no less of a commitment from you to yourself, your fellow participants, and me.

I can appreciate that some of you may not agree with me. However, we cannot have two sets of values in our community, so if anyone is not OK with this, I ask that they be honest about it and excuse themselves from the course. I'll refund their fee. No hard feelings.

That said, I hope they won't take that path. I am keen for all of us to work collaboratively to achieve our goals.

Thank you for reading.

What are your views?

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