Meditation and mindfulness - Are you serious?
I was always a skeptic when it came to meditation, energies, vibrations, and mindfulness practices. I felt that there wasn't enough credible evidence to back it up and perceived it as a collective ideology for people who'd lost faith in modern health sciences. I'd tried it a few times before, but it never succeeded in getting my mind to stop racing and be quiet, even for just a moment. It didn't seem to do much for me at all, except leave me with the feeling that I've wasted a chunk of time that could've been spent on important things. I never truly gave the concept the time of day and always brushed it off, secretly rolling my eyes at the mere mention of it.
Being what I'd call "a creative" is a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, you can naturally conjure up some magic "something" out of nothing, but on the other hand - the ticking. never. stops. - especially at times when you need it most (insert insomnia meme here). Like when you're supposed to focus on a serious conversation or read an important..."squirrel!"...piece of writing. This beautiful, exhausting gift, coupled with a heap of unwavering enthusiasm for humankind's boundless potential, an entrepreneurial spirit, and the inability to shut off, can lead to a long list of side effects such as:
Overworking and burnout
...and more
I'd like to tell you that I only experienced a couple of those side effects, but unfortunately, I had a taste of all of them mostly around the same time. It was terrible, and I felt like I'd never get out of it. It took some drastic measures, months of restructuring, and setting appropriate work-life boundaries before I finally managed to hold my head above water. And there I stayed, bobbing along, while life brought its next series of swells along my track. I felt like I was just surviving. I isolated myself, gained weight, started losing my hair, my skin became sallow and uneven, and it became a chore to feel enthusiastic about much at all.
Little did I know, a woman whom I met a few years before at a business networking event would later become crucial in helping to change my life. Beatrijs Verheijen is a Leadership Coach and HSP (Highly Sensitive Person Coach) with a background in private and investment banking. At first, we partnered up in a business context and very quickly became friends. While we worked together, I automatically took part in Beatrijs' sessions on high sensitivity and meditation, and, for the first time, I realized how the practice of meditation could help calm a monkey mind, if you do it in the right way. She taught me how to really calm my thoughts and feel at peace...free...light. I learned to appreciate meditation in those sessions, but never really considered bringing it home and using it in my everyday life.
Just when I thought things were starting to normalize, another giant wave of unexpected challenges rolled over. I could feel the weight of it all pushing me deeper and deeper down, away from the rays of hope I tried to cling to before. I couldn't let myself drown and needed to be stronger than my circumstances, but how?
I had to do something, so I put on some binaural beats to help calm the creeping anxiety and tried the techniques that Beatrijs had taught me. It felt great and helped me explore creative solutions to the problems I was facing. I became curious about what was actually happening to make that all possible and felt the need to dive into the facts behind why these techniques were so effective. I read countless journal articles, watched seminars by neuroscientists, and read related books on the subject, which helped widen my scope while I developed a whole new understanding and respect for the practice.
As it turns out, meditation is not just something you use to block off the world and escape the turbulence, while temporarily calming the waters to experience fleeting tranquility. Meditation has very real and lasting effects and can help change your actual brain. Yes, that's right. It has the ability to change the physical makeup of your brain. Studies have proven its effectiveness in cognitive (problem-solving, memory, attention, and executive functions) as well as emotional functioning, memory, self-awareness, self-regulation, and many others. Studies have found that meditation practices can even increase the volume of grey matter in your brain. Here's an interesting journal article from the National Center for Biotechnology Information: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4471247/
领英推荐
Meditation has yielded undeniable, profound, and tangible results on my mental and physical well-being, but I think that a significant amount of the credit should go to a specific theme rooted in positive psychology, and that is gratitude.
Since gaining momentum in the early 2000s, countless studies have been done and articles have been published on the effects that gratitude has on human physiology. Practicing gratitude activates regions in the brain associated with reward, empathy, and social bonding, as shown in experiments using fMRI. Increased activity could be seen in the prefrontal cortex and the anterior cingulate cortex, linked to processing emotions and decision-making. Gratitude has also been associated with changes in neurotransmitter levels, particularly dopamine and serotonin, which are crucial when it comes to mood regulation and overall well-being. These neurotransmitters contribute to feelings of happiness and contentment. Practicing gratitude also helps reduce stress (notably lower cortisol levels), enhance immune function, and improve heart health. On top of that, it activates reward pathways in the brain (such as the ventral tegmental area - VTA) and promotes neuroplasticity, helping to form new neural connections. By regularly focusing on positive experiences and emotions, gratitude can strengthen neural pathways associated with optimism, resilience, and emotional regulation, which can make lasting changes in brain structure and function.
It sounds too good to be true, but I can definitely attest to the impact it's had on my life. Very soon after I started dedicating some time every day to meditation, with a focus on gratitude, incredible and strange things started happening. My work situation and interpersonal relationships improved, my self-confidence grew, I enrolled in a new study, I felt motivated, and was finally ready to get out there again. I was happy, optimistic, and full of life, and even my physical appearance started changing too. My ability to handle stress and steer away from anxiety and negativity has honestly never been better.
It's so simple, yet so remarkably effective. Now, I am by no means an expert on any of this, but I can share some of the things I feel have really helped me. Firstly, trying to completely silence my thoughts has never worked for me. Instead, I decided to recognize the things in my mind that need specific attention and dedicate a few minutes to each of them. For example, the stress of changing my career. I'd look at it from all angles and try to understand what's making me feel stressed. I'd reassure myself that it's okay to feel that way, but then focus on gratitude. "I'm so lucky to have this opportunity. It's a new environment. The salary is better. I'll learn so much. It'll allow more time with my family". If it's something a little darker, like you feel someone is out to get you, try to look at the reasons for their behavior, and if possible try looking at them from a place of compassion. Perhaps their behavior is a defense mechanism for something unrelated. We can't possibly begin to know what's actually going on in the life of someone else. Perhaps you're experiencing feelings of guilt for something in your past. Take some time to show yourself some compassion too, "I did the best I could, with the knowledge and resources available to me at the time."
I like to think that my way of meditating has evolved in line with who I am. I don't know if there's a one-size-fits-all approach. Sometimes I take a long walk in nature, but most days I try to take a few minutes and find a quiet spot. My preference is meditating while listening to binaural beats. I sit or lie comfortably, close my eyes, and start off by taking a deep breath and exhaling. I do this several times, just focusing on breathing and relaxing my muscles with every exhale. If my mind struggles to unwind because of specific thoughts, I focus on each one for a few minutes, package it up, and move on to the next one until I feel like they've all received the attention they deserve for the time available. After that, I imagine myself in a beautiful, safe place. Usually somewhere in nature or a memorable place from my past. Sometimes I dream up something completely unique, like walking through a forest that's floating in space with fireflies and intriguing friendly creatures everywhere. Once I feel relaxed, I imagine myself achieving specific goals in my life. Then I think about all the things I'm grateful for, and in my case, I say a prayer of gratitude.
Some more learned scholars on this matter suggest that creating a gratitude journal has remarkable physiological effects. Try actively writing down the things you're grateful for on a regular basis. Another thing is to have a gratitude totem (it can be anything). I made a heart out of sterling silver that I keep in my pocket or hold in my hand as a reminder throughout the day to be grateful.
What began as skepticism and resistance has turned into an enlightening and transformative experience. As I continue on this journey, I encourage others to explore meditation and gratitude in their lives, understanding that it's not about silencing the mind but rather acknowledging their challenges and being grateful for the good things in life. By doing so, we can cultivate resilience, foster emotional well-being, and ultimately lead more fulfilling lives.