The Meaning of Life, in Three Words

Last week, I had a lovely conversation with Milford Cushman , a highly talented Vermont designer of buildings who has worked on over 1,300 projects. At one point, we were talking about how important it is to listen deeply to other human beings, and Milford said three words that I've been thinking about ever since. He described listening to his clients share hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of "stories of yearning".

I'm now wondering whether the meaning of life revolves around stories of yearning? If so, it might work like this...

The first challenge is to learn how to tell your own story of yearning, and to tell it repeatedly until—if you are very fortunate—that yearning transforms into something that feeds your soul and brings you peace.

The second challenge is to listen to the stories of yearning of other people, watching for opportunities to help them refine their tale and move down the path that is right for them. In my experience, this requires a great deal of attention and effort, because most of us hide our stories of yearning for fear of being too vulnerable. We are afraid to admit what we want, perhaps because at times what we want seems so faint and distant as to be impossible to reach.

The third challenge is a bit broader. It is to recognize that everyone has a story of yearning—often unstated and many times so vague they cannot put it into words—and that this drives their beliefs, attitudes and actions. If we pursue our own story and ignore the fact that everyone has their own story, then we doom ourselves to a shallow and lonely existence.

***

Here's the thing. I'm pretty good with words, and patient enough to sit quietly. I do my best to pay attention. And yet, my own story of yearning seems elusive. Perhaps more accurately, it feels incomplete. I know what I want, but don't know why.

This is not an article to read quickly, then move on. Stories of yearning are ethereal. Finding yours is like searching for the Holy Grail; it's not something you can do in a weekend. But I'd like to suggest that we can take a giant step forward simply by realizing that each of us has a story of yearning, and the meaning of life is to understand yours and the stories of those you love.

Bruce Kasanoff ?is a social media?ghostwriter ?for entrepreneurs. He lives on the side of a mountain in Utah.