Maybe I'm Just Not That Good

"Nobody knows who you are, and nobody cares what you have to say."

I appreciated the blunt assessment I got from the experienced marketing mind I hired to help me with my next book. A plan that actually turned into a full fledged rebrand (cue your eye roll/dry heave at the term "rebrand"). But his assessment was accurate. At least objectively based on book sales and the "followers" I have, or rather don't have, across the various social media platforms.

And I woke up this morning with this thought that maybe I am just not that good. It has been five years since I earnestly embarked on a mission to speak professionally, and I have yet to really "break through," at least based on the demand for my services. It has been two years since I published my 1st book, and after getting the numbers of books sold over the past 6 months, and my subsequent royalty payments, it certainly isn't going to let me retire, or at least quit my day job. And I have been writing this blog (published on Substack as well) since the summer of 2022, and have been stuck on the same number of followers there for the past year.

All these signs point to the fact that maybe, I'm just not that good.

But there are other signs pointing in the opposite direction:

-Strangers reaching out to me after doing a book club on my 1st book, Permission to Care: Building a Healthcare Culture That Thrives in Chaos

-Strangers responding to this very blog, relating to what I write

-A friend verbalizing how she will read this to her husband because "The advice just hits at the right time when I need it."

So which is it? Do I really have nothing worth saying? Or is it something else?

My, eh, popularity conundrum reminds me of my golf game. For the past 20 years, I shoot somewhere between 90 and 100-when I get the rare chance to play. There is not much progress. But I also don't get the chance to practice much. Despite this lack of practice, I used to get frustrated with my poor performance. Until my epiphany that my expectations of performance need to align with the realities of my practice. Since then, I take each round as a chance to spend time with my dad, or other friends, soak in the sun, and catch brief moments of competence on the golf course. I'm not that good, but I shouldn't expect to be.

How does this relate to my writing and speaking?

Maybe I'm not that good, no really. But it's not the writing and speaking part (although you may disagree, which is fair!). It's the marketing part. Of which I have zero experience. And, what I have realized, is a major part of being an author. A major part that most authors don't enjoy, nor want to do.

It's what I'm not that good at: expanding my reach.

Just writing top notch articles and books isn't enough. And so I can't be upset with myself for not growing my audience, in much the same way I can't be upset at my consistently bad golf game: I don't practice at either enough.

My biggest hangup with selling myself is that sleazy feeling that I get from others trying to sell me things. But that sentiment ignores when I get sold something that makes my life better.

And that's my goal in writing to you: whether you read this (and hopefully share it), or buy one of my books, you spend your time and money, and in return your life is better. So, I won't apologize in advance for throwing in a request to buy one of my books, or share this with a friend. Because if the feedback I have gotten from you is legit, it means that more people would benefit from what I write.

It also means I want to hear from you: What problem are burning in your life? Are you a parent? If so, prepare for a solid couple months of posts related to that. What other problems do you want me to tackle with my patented humor and unique perspective?

Because maybe you feel like you are just not that good. But it's not the problem you think it is, but something else that's standing in the way of your true talent?

I'll end this by thanking you for reading this, and whatever else you read that I write. While I don't expect to get rich off my books, I wouldn't mind to get "pay my bills" off them. But that means acknowledging for me I can't just keep writing and hoping. Because I'm not that good at selling myself, but I'll keep working on that.

So if you liked this, share it. If you really like this, and want to hear from me more, why don't ya sign up for my new monthly newsletter too? And if you really, really like this, I think you'll enjoy a whole book's worth of stuff I write about.