The "a" Matters

I met a friend for dinner last night. We had not seen each other for quite a while (thanks, Covid) so it was great to catch up.?

Neither of us pulled out our smartphones until we wanted to add a note to remember a recommended book or series. When we did that, a text popped up on her screen from her sister. It said “Mom’s birthday is on Sunday. Are you guys free to come to us?”.?

My friend apologized— I’m so sorry for reading this but you’ve got to hear it. She read the text and looked very confused. My mom’s birthday is not for months. I don’t get what’s going on. I thought maybe her sister’s phone was hacked. She thought maybe her sister was “losing it”.

After a few minutes, she said she was worried and just wanted to call her sister to make sure nothing was wrong. She reached her right away asked if everything was okay. Her sister said why? She said because mom’s birthday is not for months and your text says it is Sunday.?

Her sister adamantly confirmed “Mom’s birthday IS on a Sunday.” My friend said yes, it is on A Sunday, but not THIS Sunday as your text said.?It turns out her sister was texting while driving (not great) and missed the “a”.?

I’m reminded of just how easy the meaning of messages can change with the addition or deletion of a single letter. Sometimes it’s a single word. Sometimes it’s tone or emphasis that is inferred from the use of punctuation, italics, bold or CAPS. Sometimes it’s just the story in someone's head because of things they have experienced.?

With so much of our communications being digital, it’s worthwhile to take an extra moment and check that you are helping the receiver understand what you actually mean.?