"Mastering Personal Branding: A Candid Guide & 10 Commandments"

For those aiming to establish a personal brand, please take heed:

Many of us, myself included, are actively engaged in promoting and nurturing personal brands, whether for ourselves or others. However, amidst this bustling activity, there's a crucial aspect that often goes unmentioned online, which I feel compelled to address:

The price of "Fame" can be a heavy one to pay. Many set out on the path to building their personal brand with the goal of increasing followers, expanding reach and engagement on social media, and inundating their inboxes and DMs with messages. However, stepping into the public eye makes you vulnerable to being treated as "public property".

During my days in the music scene, performing on stage and promoting events alongside famous and influential figures, I witnessed a darker side to the limelight. People demanded attention, requested pictures, sent friend requests, and acted as if they knew you intimately. They would also leave derogatory comments on social media posts and become confrontational if their requests were not reciprocated. I've seen many of my celebrity friends succumb to anxiety due to this, and I've experienced it myself over the years – akin to facing cyberbullying.

Just this week, there was an incident where the incredibly kind-hearted and talented Tom Boston received a negative comment on his YouTube channel from a stranger.

Examining the experiences of celebrities, musicians, and participants on reality TV shows like Big Brother and Love Island reveals numerous instances where individuals sought fame only to find themselves overwhelmed and ill-equipped to handle the increased attention. In some tragic cases, it has even led to thoughts of suicide or worse.

Recently, while coaching someone in sales (I'll maintain their anonymity for privacy reasons), their LinkedIn post went "viral". Consequently, they were bombarded with connection requests and DMs seeking advice on replicating their success. What initially seemed positive gradually transformed into pure anxiety, affecting their mental well-being. They began questioning whether they needed to alter their LinkedIn profile to keep up with the newfound attention and how to recreate the virality of their initial post. They even found themselves logging onto LinkedIn during weekends, deviating from their usual routine.

Together, we concluded that nothing needed to change; they didn't have to respond to every DM. They were the same person before the post, and they should remain true to themselves afterwards. While they've managed to navigate through this ordeal, it prompted me to share my thoughts in the hope of sparing others from a similar experience.

I recounted my journey of grappling with increased attention over the years: managing multiple email inboxes, Google calendars, LinkedIn messages, Slack channels, and WhatsApp conversations, alongside running a business, hosting a podcast (it's daunting even to read this back), and juggling various social media accounts. And this doesn't even include the personal messages and calls I receive daily from friends and family.

Here are ten personal guidelines I've established to maintain effective boundaries in the realm of online presence:

1. Prioritise yourself above all else; you owe nothing to anyone but yourself.

2. Remember that you're human, not a machine or algorithm; don't behave as if you were one.

3. You're not obliged to respond to every comment, DM, or message.

4. Only engage in activities that you genuinely want to pursue, not out of obligation.

5. Establish a cut-off time for being online; put your devices away, and if possible, disconnect during weekends.

6. Recognise that some individuals thrive on negativity and confrontation online; avoid engaging with them as it doesn't serve your well-being or pay your bills.

7. Don't hesitate to decline requests, calls, or meetings that don't align with your priorities or values.

8. Taking breaks from social media is essential for your mental health; don't fear missing out or losing followers – in reality, no one notices.

9. Be cautious of emulating those you admire online; beneath their polished profiles lie their own set of challenges and struggles.

10. Stay true to yourself; don't change for the sake of others. If you wish to grow your brand, do so at your own pace.

I recently stumbled upon a profound insight shared by Mattia Schaper , whom I deeply respect. From transitioning from an SDR to founding a €2m business, her perspective on using LinkedIn as her personal diary resonated deeply with me when she came on my podcast.

"I've always been super relaxed on LinkedIn, I don't post much, I post 2x a week, I don't post every week, I use LinkedIn as my personal diary, I don't put the pressure on myself, to release expert content, I literally sit down in the morning, brushing my teeth, and think what happened this week, did I win or lose a deal? Did I learn something? Then I just write it down

- I think a lot of things we judge about ourselves when we are afraid of posting, a lot of the time we judge other people on what they post, I would rid myself of all these judgments about is this good enough?"

She emphasised the importance of being kind to oneself and not succumbing to self-judgment or the pressure of perfectionism.

Therefore, when embarking on the journey of building your personal brand, remember to stay authentic, be kind to yourself, and pursue it because it aligns with your aspirations – not because of external pressure.

#HappyPosting - Neil