Mastering Inner Peace and Joy Amidst Life's Storms

Personal transformation is no longer a luxury but a necessity

The dynamics and complexity of all kinds of changes have started to give a sense of "saturation" to most people, regardless of age, position, and status. In recent years, we've all experienced unexpected and impactful events that have shown us it's not easy to cope.

We struggle to hold onto old mindsets and habits that don't serve us well in a new world where everything is constantly updating. We invest a lot of time, energy, and money into updating our knowledge and qualifications professionally. However, we often neglect the fact that we also need an update at a personal level. I believe personal update is the most important.

I tend to say that the brilliance of a position or role within a company comes from the person behind it.

Personal transformation is not a luxury, but a necessity. We often ponder how unhappy we are about various aspects of our lives. We keep asking ourselves: "How can I regain the joy of life? How can I make things work? What should I do?" Unfortunately, they remain just questions because even though we realize we need to work on ourselves, we don't truly commit to taking concrete action.

We continue to blame circumstances or find excuses for why we can't change. This happens even if we feel overwhelmed and threatened by burnout.

The truth is, the only person capable of positively changing your life, is you. And for that, you need to change yourself. You are the only one who can exercise for yourself, have a discussion with your partner, or do whatever is necessary to thrive in your career, with your colleagues and collaborators, etc.

So, what's stopping you? To change your life, you need to fundamentally change how you think, act, and feel – essentially, your personality.

Why is personality so important? Because it shapes your personal reality.

Therefore, if you want to make changes in your life, it's important to make transformations on a personality level.

Significant changes at the personal level and in our personal reality often fail because we stop processing the information at a mental or theoretical level. After selecting information in line with ourselves, it needs to be integrated/infused at the psychological, emotional, physical, and spiritual levels.

We are a collection of thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors, that we've practiced for the longest time. For a real transformation, we need to deeply discover ourselves through SELF-AWARENESS, and then program true psychological changes.

In other words, we need to SELF-ACTUALIZE.

The past few years have shown us how unpredictable life is, how quickly and unexpectedly everything can change around us. At the same time, I believe it has sent us the strongest message:

"It's time to update yourself and embrace life in a new, different world, continuing to find joy and fulfillment."

Studies have shown that 95% of our actions are determined by the subconscious mind. This is where we store memories of past experiences, all sorts of limiting beliefs, fears, regrets, frustrations...the so-called programs, that intervene and create sometimes an unpleasant state we can't explain, or often lead us to act differently than we would consciously want.

We've become accustomed to being conditioned by the external world to feel good inside. However, at the same time, any negative thing from the outside influences our inner state.

We all know it's very easy to maintain a great inner state, to feel full of love and acceptance when things are going well externally, especially when you feel like all doors are opening for you.

But what do we do in a time like this that we live in? A time of continuous uncertainty, transition, and turmoil – a time when it seems we don't have much control over what happens around us?

The truth is, the only control we have is over what happens in our inner world.

To master it, you need to live in accordance with your heart, maintain a state of inner peace and love, and constantly rebalance yourself.

I can say this from my own experience, with the clarification that achieving this goal takes time, patience, and, of course, self-training.

I don't mean to suggest that you'll reach a life where there's nothing negative anymore: no sadness or pain, or loss, and neither that you should deny your emotions, but that these periods shorten significantly and won't have power over you anymore because you'll have a different perspective on them and you'll be able to manage your emotions.

Here are, 4 strategies you can use to improve your inner world and create a dominant sense of well-being despite the conditions in your external world. You can use them regardless of your life context and profession!

1.???? Work with your thoughts and emotions

In general, there are three forms of stress to rebalance: physical, chemical, and emotional. Physical and chemical stress are much easier to deal with. We can perhaps see a chiropractor or get acupuncture, eat properly, practice yoga and pilates, take short vacations, etc.

But when it comes to emotions, we think of a more complex process of transformation. Even if we are guided by someone, we need to work on our own, especially with our thoughts, which generate emotion. After all, we are emotional beings.

Many people who engage in or embrace this emotional management work misunderstand it, thinking that we shouldn't feel or express our emotions.

Nothing could be further from the truth! It's important to pay attention to them, but not to dwell too much on destructive ones.

Let's see what you can do to start:

• Be constantly aware of what you're thinking, if those thoughts are relevant and if they're helpful!
• Once you've identified a specific problem, focus your attention on solutions and avoid asking yourself questions that don't help you with anything other than getting more annoyed!
• Do your best to direct your attention towards thoughts that make you feel better, towards what you want to achieve and how you would feel when you achieve it!

For several years now, I've been using a practice that helps me a lot. Namely, I ask myself: “Does this thought lead me towards what I want?”

We all know that where you focus your attention, your energy follows, and that any thought influences your emotional state in a positive or negative way, which influences how you act and, consequently, the outcome you want to achieve.

Another practice is to focus on what you want rather than its absence. There's a big difference in emotion that you immediately feel. Here you can ask yourself: "How would it feel to have that?" Think about it only as long as you feel good; otherwise, direct your attention elsewhere – perhaps towards something neutral.

2. Stay centered and maintain a good state of being!

Regarding stress, we know it's unpredictable and can take control when it becomes too much. This disrupts your mental and emotional balance, significantly decreasing your inner resource state.

Fortunately, you can intervene in such situations by staying centered, meaning consciously returning to a state of calm and inner balance.

Einstein said it beautifully, "No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it."

Here's a simple focusing exercise you can apply starting right now!

Whenever you feel agitated, distracted, restless, scattered, or at the point where you feel like you can't take it anymore, take a few minutes and center yourself.

Find a quiet place, close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and direct your attention to the middle of your chest – in the heart area. Sit quietly and breathe normally until you feel calm and centered. Even if your attention tries to wander to other thoughts, bring it back to the heart area and notice how you breathe.

To enhance the feeling, you can think of a loved one and fill your heart with love, or anything else that makes you feel good.

The sooner you intervene – meaning at the first signs of stress – the sooner you regain your balance.

The key to this practice is repetition, so use it as often as possible during the day, whenever you feel you've lost that centering state.

You'll gain a pleasant inner peace that quiets your mind and allows you to return to balance.

3.??? Create a morning routine

How you start your day is very important, or rather – how you prepare for the day ahead. Just as, an airplane is prepared for the flight it's about to take.

When you wake up, there's a moment when you feel very good, but thoughts and worries can immediately arise, affecting your state. Remember that in the morning, you have the greatest resources because you've just slept, during which you've regained your strength.

If you fall victim to worrying thoughts, your state of inner resources decreases very quickly. That's why it's important to do something that helps you maintain a good and productive state.

You decide what you do and how much time you take for it.

For example, I meditate for 30 minutes, then do some yoga exercises. Afterward, I enjoy coffee and dark chocolate while I write in my journal or read/listen to something I like. Then, I move on to other activities. It has become a routine for me, something I do like brushing my teeth.

In any case, it's important that it's something good for you and in line with your schedule, something that brings you joy and refreshes you. Even just 10-20 minutes can be enough!

4.??? Prioritise Me-Time for Inner Balance

In other words, make room for you in your life!

Throughout the day, it's very easy to become overwhelmed by all the activities you've put on your priority list. This is often referred to as the TO DO List. Your interactions with others – both loved ones, colleagues, or strangers – can produce feelings of stress and sometimes even anxiety.

If you have children, a partner, a house, a career, or an elderly parent, it can be difficult to find time for yourself. However, it's very necessary because it helps you go through your day and its tasks more easily.

The most important thing is to find a balance in everything and be able to connect with things that truly make you happy. So, think about things, places, or activities that fill your soul with joy and find some time during the day for them.

This time should be non-negotiable, and should have real priority.

First and foremost, take care of yourself. Otherwise, you can't optimally take care of others who need your help!

If you're a parent, for example, it's preferable to spend beautiful and calm time with your child, time in which they feel your love and not the frustration of unfinished tasks. So, center yourself before spending time with them.

You might say, "I don't have time for that!!!" However, the better and more balanced you feel, the faster and better you can handle tasks. The time for recentring may take you a maximum of 5 -10 minutes. When it becomes a routine, you'll do it in 2-3 minutes.

This will give you the energy to stay present and enjoy life more. When you constantly give to others and put yourself last on the list, you start to create resentment, guilt, anxiety, and even depression.

Do your best to nourish yourself first so you have something to give. Just like the heart, without which we couldn't live: it takes the best blood for itself and then distributes it to the other organs.

So, I suggest you do the following: schedule some time during your day – it can be 10 minutes or an hour, depending on your plans – and do something you truly love. It can be something simple, like listening to music or reading a book, or dancing or going out in nature. Mark this time on your calendar and stick to it every day! You'll feel more inspired and creative!

In essence, by prioritizing inner growth and emotional resilience, we can navigate life's challenges with grace and fortitude. Amidst the ebb and flow of external circumstances, our inner sanctuary remains a source of enduring peace and joy.

Let us embrace the journey of self-discovery and transformation, anchoring ourselves amidst life's turbulent seas!

Sending love,

Irina??

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Irina Kuhlmann is an International Executive Leadership Coach – Accredited Master Coach, with a unique blend of experience as a former senior executive and business owner in Denmark, backed by 13 years of expertise in professional coaching. She is devoted to helping business people, entrepreneurs, and high performance – achievers to regain their authenticity and live a happy and prosperous life in an ever-changing world.

“My path to coaching was sparked by a significant health challenge that temporarily paused my business career. During my recovery, alongside medical treatments, I dedicated several years to my personal transformation through the study and application of Neuroscience, NLP, Coaching, and Leadership. This profound and impactful learning journey ultimately transformed me into a successful Life Coach.”

If you need guidance in your life journey or seek other transformations in your life, I'm here to support you as your coach. For more details and to reserve your coaching strategy session, visit: https://www.irinakuhlmann.com