Mastering Difficult Conversations: The Power of the Reframe Technique

So here's our 4th and final little one-percenter, designed to help you manage a difficult conversation.

How many times do you have to prove a customer (or colleague) wrong? How often do you hear a customer spout the terms and conditions at you thinking they know more about your services and contracts than you do?

Do you ever have to tell a customer they haven't got their facts straight?

It's a tricky one, this. These types of customers tend to bring out the worst in us. We almost want them to lose face and make them look stupid for being in the wrong while making ourselves feel a little smug knowing we've got the facts right and we know better.

But it's so important that we keep rapport intact when we need to tell a customer they're factually incorrect in what they're telling us.

And the way to do this is through this fabulous little Purple Cow WOW – the REFRAME technique.

So, here's how it works. First, we find something to AGREE on so that our customer or colleague gets a sense of one-upmanship or satisfaction that they've been proven right. So, they're on their back foot when we then disagree with what they've said.

The reframe technique serves two powerful purposes. First, it helps the other person save face and not look stupid when they discover they've got their facts wrong but it also ensures the rapport you've built during the conversation remains fully intact.

So here's a real case scenario using the reframe technique, then it's over to you to create a couple of responses of your own.

This example is a very common one a client of ours faces almost every day when their customer calls to complain about too much money being taken from their account on the final direct debit of their car loan agreement after which the car is rightfully owned by them.

But part of this final payment includes what's known as an Option to Purchase Fee. All car loan companies have this fee applied at the end of the agreement and it's taken right at the end of the term in order to transfer ownership and remove all interest in the car by the finance provider.

This option to purchase fee is made very clear at the start of the agreement and it's also very clearly explained in the terms and conditions of the contract that the customer doesn't become the rightful owner of the car until the option to purchase fee is settled at the end of the contract as part of the final payment.

The conversation usually involves the customer ‘kicking off’ about so-called hidden charges and this fee not being explained at the outset and sometimes even demanding to remove the charge because they feel they've been wrongly informed. It's all too tempting to get on our high horse in this situation especially when we've got the proof that the customer is wrong and we are right.

But fuelling the fire only creates a furnace and it's definitely not the way to win an argument with a customer but the Reframe Technique is.

So, using the Reframe Technique, we might say instead,

"I agree Mr. Customer. It's extremely frustrating when you think you've settled an agreement only to discover that there's a final fee to pay. Although I disagree that the option to purchase fee is something that was hidden from you as it clearly states in your contract that the fee is payable as part of the final payment in order to rightly transfer ownership of the car to you. And I'm very happy to email you a copy of the contract that you signed so that you can be assured it is a condition of the loan if you'd like me to."

Or we might say,

"I agree, it is an odd term to refer to it as an option to purchase fee because there isn't actually an option not to pay the fee as this is the only way the car becomes rightfully yours and we release any claims on it as your finance provider. It is correct however, that the way the fee works is explained to you in your agreement on page 4, which you signed at the start of your contract, which explains what the option to purchase fee is, how much it is and when it will be taken from you. I can certainly send you a copy of your signed agreement if that would help clarify things for you."

So, a couple of tips to ensure that you use the Reframe Technique to best effect. First the words;

“I agree that….. although ?I disagree that…..”

OR the softer alternative

“although, it IS correct that….”, are crucial.

When a customer hears first “I agree with you” their guard comes down and they feel more receptive to whatever else you have to say, so that when you say, "I disagree however," you sound much less confrontational.

Secondly, when you tell the customer they're wrong you must bring on the evidence that proves they're wrong. So in this example, the proof is the actual wording in the agreement that's evidenced on page four of the contract.

Nice and simple….just needs a little practice to perfect.?

We’d love to hear your success stories when using any of the ‘difficult conversation’ tips we’ve offered over the last few weeks so do feel free to drop me a LinkedIn comment.

In the meantime, be sure to KEEP FIT!

For more top tips and ideas we invite you to join our FREE 30 minute training video designed to ensure you and your teams continue to deliver remarkable customer service.? Just click on the link in the comments below.

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