Mastering Active Listening: From LSD to OPQ

Much has been said and written about active listening, and the sheer number of techniques out there proves that while everyone loves to talk, not everyone knows how to listen. And so do I! Over the last 20 years of training, I've developed my own technique—a combination of methods I've encountered that seem to work best for the thousands of people we train every year at SkillsGym.

For many years, I championed the LSD technique for active listening. I loved its simplicity and memorability: Listen, Summarize, and Dig Deeper. Sounds easy, right? But after witnessing countless simulation exercises with business actors (not to be confused with amateur "roleplay"), I noticed how challenging it is to truly put into practice. Instead of LSD, a more common scenario often plays out: AIG (Assume, Interrupt, and Give your own opinion).?Plus, LSD has its limitations:

1. Listening: People often don't know how, what, or whom to listen to.
2. Summarizing: Repeating what someone just said can be confusing and annoying, disrupting the conversation.
3. Digging Deeper: While it sounds good in theory, people struggle with how to do it effectively.

So, I developed a new technique that I believe will someday make me famous: OPQ. It may not sound as sexy as LSD, but there's a reason for that:

OPQ: Observe, Paraphrase, Question

O: Observe

Observing goes beyond just listening. I teach an observation technique called the 'PALM' Technique:

• Physical Cues: What is their body language saying?
• Attention: What are they focusing on??Are there recurring themes?
• Language: What words are they using? What does that reveal about their perspective?
• Meaning: What meaning do they derive from the conversation? What are they hoping to achieve?

P: Paraphrase

Borrowing from Chris Voss, former FBI agent, paraphrasing is more effective than summarizing. Repeat the last 2-3 words someone says to show you’re listening and encourage them to continue. This technique reinforces their message and deepens the conversation.

Q: Question

Ask open-ended questions (starting with Why, What, When, Where, How, Who, Which) to dig deeper based on your PALM observations. Prioritize ‘What?’ and ‘How’ questions, they are the most solution- and future-focused of the bunch. Here are some examples:

• Physical Cues: "You seem really excited when you talk about that project.?What’s most exciting to you?”
• Attention: "You mentioned better communication. How can I be more effective?”
• Meaning: "I hope I was able to address your concerns. How are you feeling now about moving forward?”
• Language: “You mentioned the word ‘agile’ a few times. What exactly does it mean to work more agile?”

Conclusion

Active listening is more than just hearing words; it's about truly understanding and engaging with the speaker. While LSD provided a good starting point, OPQ offers a more nuanced and effective approach. By observing, paraphrasing, and questioning, you can transform your listening skills and foster deeper, more meaningful conversations. Give OPQ a try and see how it changes the way you connect with others.

Talk to you soon!

Sarah

Ps: I recently did a linkedin live on this, watch it here .