M*A*S*H

M*A*S*H was a classic US TV Comedy Series first released in 1972 and lasting for more than a decade.? It was an acronym for Medical Army Surgical Hospital and was about three doctors in The Korean War.? Thankfully it pre-dated the need for the often over-used and nauseating canned laughter that is now associated with US Comedy.? However, I ?have also chosen M*A*S*H ?because of the title theme tune, ‘Suicide Is Painless’ which provides a convenient SEGWAY into the UK General Election and, ironically, an election that is now booked for US Independence Day.

It may not have gone un-noticed that Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak, is in the process of committing his own ‘Political Suicide’ announcing what many have described as a premature decision to seek a fresh mandate from the Electorate. However, others would see this announcement as timely, but perhaps not that well choreographed. ?The timing was always going to be unpredictable but, as a PR exercise, the Presentation was an unmitigated disaster and will enter the archives as a sensational moment, arguably, for all the wrong reasons.

Who advised The Prime Minister to commit Political Suicide, by spending five minutes outside Number 10 in the pouring rain in one of his expensive suits. The choreography clearly demonstrated that the Conservative Party is now totally bereft of any new ideas or plans, arguably that it is well past the ‘sell-by’ date and is totally resigned to losing the General Election.? The disastrous presentation outside Number 10 was not only amplified the following day by the headline of ‘Drowning Street’ in one of the tabloids but that wasn’t enough. The Prime Minister then went on a walk about the next day to The Titanic Ship Yard in Belfast.? In the middle of this cocktail of cock-ups he even managed to upset The Welsh asking them if they were looking forward to The European Football Finals before he was reminded that Wales hadn’t qualified.?

Labour’s leader, Ed Miliband, and his chosen theme, The Ed Stone, was central to him losing the General Election in 2010, heralding the introduction of The CONDEM Coalition, led by Dodgy Dave Cameron but Sunak’s Comedy of Errors certainly trumps that classic faux pas from Ed Miliband.? If they haven’t therefore done so already, perhaps the Prime Minister’s best friends who are not his Trusted Advisors, just need to have a quiet word with him, if only for the benefit of his own mental health.?

In summary, it’s time to say Goodbye Rishi. The good ship ‘Conservative’ is sinking faster than the Titanic and I say this with some sadness as a life-long Conservative Voter but, for the first time, I will not be voting for this Party on July 4th.? Many of its disciples can already see the writing on the wall in their own constituencies and they have either or are in the process of ‘jumping ship’ but, I also appreciate that The Captain of the ship will always have the honour of jumping last; no doubt he will have another personal plan up his sleeve but one that will work for him outside politics.

This whole charade reminds me of that famous track from A Little Light Music recorded by Julie Covington and written by Stephen Sondheim, ‘Send in the Clowns’, because some of these lyrics are highly appropriate and timely.

Just when I'd stopped opening doors; finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours. Making my entrance again with my usual flair; sure of my lines; no one is there.

Don't you love farce? My fault, I fear; I thought that you'd want what I want. Sorry, my dear; but where are the clowns? Quick send in the clowns; don’t bother they’re here.

Summarizing the current position, most of the Clowns have already jumped or are in the process of jumping ship and I would expect further surprises as the General Election draws closer, because the whole political landscape is in dire need of reform if not, The REFORM Party. Until the Conservative Party re-discovers its core values and understands why the electorate has deserted it, The Party could indeed sustain a very long period of time in ‘The Wilderness’. For M*A*S*H read complete HASH.? Any acronym welcomed.

Other appropriate lyrics from A Little Light Music are ‘Someday the Sun won’t Shine for You’, ‘Living in the Past’ and ‘Life is a Long Song'.