Mary Poppins Syndrome

I hope this finds you well and enjoying life! Now, unless you've read Claim Your SWAGGER, you probably don't know this about me.

I know exactly what it feels like to hit rock bottom. I know what it feels like to come home to an eviction notice on the door, to have your dad tell you that you're not the same person anymore, and to have a therapist tell?me that they haven't figured out a reason to hate me so why do I?

I know what it feels like to not even recognize the person in the mirror and to have absolutely no idea of where to go from here.?

People who don't know this about me?tend to see me in a different light. Their perception of me is quite different. Let's explore this through the use of nicknames.

Nicknames are often formulated based on perceptions or how people see us.?

So, what nicknames have people created for you over time? Are there some that are still in use today? What might those nicknames say about how people perceive you?

Okay, are you ready for this? One of the nicknames people used to call me in college if you can believe it, was Mary Poppins. You know, practically perfect in every way...?

Well, I can tell you this, I'm not perfect. Nothing could be further from the truth. That doesn't change the fact that people sometimes see me that way, hence the nickname.

That's exactly what we're tackling in this week's?SWAGGER Sense,??something I like to call the Mary Poppins Syndrome.??

There are two things I'd like to focus on here.?

1. Awareness of how other people see us.

2. What steps we can take to shift their perspective.

Let's start with the first one. How do we know?the way?other people see us? What is the best way to find out??

Yes! You guessed it, ask. However, it's not that easy to do, is it? But why?

Fear is most likely the cause. We're afraid of what we might discover. It takes courage to ask and to be open to what you might find out.?

Instead of letting fear get in the way, try thinking about?it as an experiment and a powerful learning opportunity. Put on your scientific hat and engage your curiosity. Here are some questions to help you get started.?

• What three words would you use to describe me?
• What actions or behaviors have you seen me demonstrate that caused you to select those specific words?

Now let's tackle the second aspect. Once you learn how other people see you, what can you do to shift their perspective? Any thoughts?

There are two clues in the second question I?provided. Have you figured it out yet??

Exactly, through our actions and behaviors.?

Let's use me as an example. As I stated, there are times when people tend to see me as "perfect". Why is that? What actions or behaviors might be creating this perception?

Well, it's probably my SWAGGER. I tend to be confident, self-assured, comfortable in my own skin, smiling all the time, happy, and give off the impression that I've got my s**t together.?

People find it incredibly difficult to relate and connect with someone they think is "perfect" because in their mind they'll never measure up.

Okay, so what might I do to shift that perspective?

One of the most powerful things I can do is demonstrate that I'm human. I have to show people that I don't have it all figured out and that I make mistakes all the time.?

I do this by sharing stories about myself, making fun of myself, and highlighting mistakes.?

Let me show you what I mean.?

I was dining with some colleagues a while back and they were talking about their favorite fast-food restaurants. Well, I don't eat fast food all that much or at all really. So of course, they shifted into seeing me as "Little Miss Perfect" again.?

So, I proceeded to talk about one of my all-time favorite foods when I lived in Arizona that I still crave today. It was from this hole-in-the-wall restaurant that had a 24-hour drive-through. So, I guess you could call it fast food, but it isn't your typical chain restaurant. I used to get this bean and cheese burrito that probably weighed close to two pounds. It was massive. The beans were made with lard, which made them even more enjoyable, and they were covered in super melty cheese. I would often stop there on my way home from the airport because I could not wait any longer to satisfy my craving for that burrito. I still think about it all the time and have even pondered having them ship me a burrito to where I live now. Probably not a good idea, but that doesn't keep me from thinking and wishing.??

You might be wondering what the big deal is and why I shared that story.?

In this context, I was able to relate to and connect with my colleagues over food that we love. I was able to demonstrate that I'm a real person, that I?crave and eat things that aren't necessarily good for me, just like them.?

I?tell this story to highlight the idea that sharing a bit of yourself and showing that you're human doesn't always mean divulging your deepest and darkest secrets. It simply requires you to?let people see a different side of you, one they might not know about.?

This was my example, however, to shift the perception of others toward you might?require a different approach. That is the reason you ask the question about the actions and behaviors they have seen. Those will give you clues as to what you can do differently to create a new perspective.?

Hopefully, you now know that I'm not Mary Poppins, but more importantly, you have some steps you can take to identify how other people see you and do something to change it if you so desire.?

Don't keep this to yourself! If you found this information useful, share?it with others!

If you're looking for more activities and things you can do to create positive change in your life, check out?"Claim Your Swagger".?In it, you'll find multiple activities and daily reinforcements you can do right now to start to claim your SWAGGER and start thriving!?

Self-awareness is one of the keys to success. Let's all?tap into our courage and be willing to find out how other people see us.?

Jennifer??

P.S.?I've taken learning out of the classroom in this exclusive experience at Triple Creek Ranch.?The SWAGGER Revive and Renew Retreat?is a build-your-own learning adventure where you embark on a personal growth and development journey while being pampered in the all-inclusive rustic elegance of Triple Creek Ranch. The learning is built into the activities you choose to participate in. Space is extremely limited so, don't wait, reserve your spot now!?

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