Managing the Message #2: If you want to be taken seriously, lose the red nose...

I went for a run this morning (still allowed) and I was thinking (also still allowed....for now), did we all get the message from our Prime Minister last night? Well, the acid test of whether any message is effectively received is the response....and so, whilst running (still the same run, so allowed), I watched the traffic. Part of my run takes me along a major road, always busy. Was it as busy today as it was yesterday? Yes. I found myself designing some bizarre system of censorship, assessing whether the journey of each vehicle could be regarded as ‘essential travel’. Few, in my (admittedly haphazard and speculative) opinion met the required criteria. The trucks are helpful because they usually state their contents on the side of the vehicle and so, on that basis, “Eggs – yes”, “Easter Eggs – no”. As the cross-country car transporter swept past me I wondered at what point shifting nine Vauxhall Astras became essential travel...and what about the car drivers? Well, bear in mind if you’re driving a Honda Jazz, you are by default, over 70 and should be self-isolating, and also bear in mind that thousands of cases of Covid-19 have been traced directly to use of petrol pumps, so to those of you who say “I’m just carrying on as normal” I’d say “I think you’re missing the point...”

And so to return to the PM who managed to retain his serious face throughout his statement to the nation last night, not easy for Boris as we know, but sadly he has yet to master serious hair. Does it matter? Yes. Because, as I explained yesterday in Managing the Message #1, the visuals matter and we struggle with contradiction. In terms of gravitas, the (usually endearing) messy hair simply doesn’t work in a grave situation, it’s the styling equivalent of a clown’s comedy red nose in that it distracts the mind from the words being spoken. This was not the time to walk the political line of trying to reassure, calm and bring people resolutely and determinedly into line all at the same time, it doesn’t work with small children and it doesn’t work with grown-ups either. We’re back to mixed messages again. This situation required a no hints, no holds-barred direct approach. First he should have been standing, not sitting. It’s very hard to grab attention and be noticed whilst sitting, ask any wheelchair user trying to order drinks at a bar (when they reopen, obviously). Stance, body language and consistency of message are all vital, but please drop the fist-banging on the desk PM, we don’t like that and, again, it’s an unnecessary distraction and it irks us...So stand up, and forget the niceties and yes, I know nanny always told you to ask nicely, and I’m not suggesting Dennis Skinner-esque bluntness here, but at times like this being ‘nice’ equates to being vague and therefore details are important. Not “from this evening I ask that you do/do not...” but rather “from 10.30 p.m./midnight tonight, Monday 23rd March 2020 every single person must...” ( we DO need a specific time) “until midnight on 13th April 2020” (so much better than a vague three weeks...no one knows when that is, our brain needs a number, a date to fix on, and incidentally even if it changes later, it’s still fine. Then we sit up and notice and it works. Remember if we say “I’ll be home in five minutes” no one believes you, whereas if you say “I’ll be there in six and a half minutes” we’re in no doubt. Lose the incongruity and we lose the ambiguity. Just saying...