Managing Impostor Syndrome: CMOs Share Struggles and Strategies for The Inner Critic

Some of the most successful marketing leaders in the world and almost every one of them admits to Impostor Syndrome.

It's a common thread, really. Some of the most successful entrepreneurs and business leaders I know - name brands in many circles - still don't think they are enough, still believe they don't belong.

Last Friday's CMO Coffee Talk sessions featured Kris Kelso author of Overcoming The Impostor . We talked deeply about why our inner critic has so much power and how to manage it.

In more than three years of CMO Coffee Talk Friday sessions, this may have been the most active, the most vulnerable, the most impactful one we've done.

Below are chat highlights from both sessions. Real, raw shares.

If you are a B2B CMO or head of marketing and want to join a community of nearly 2,700 of your peers, let me know or click here to learn more and sign up .

I have an entire network of critics in my head

My imposter syndrome is at an all time high right now

Interesting point - high achievers feel more like impostors!

The bigger the role the bigger the job the further I am away from whatever crazy imposter version of myself my head has

It’s funny, the imposter syndrome seems to pop up more for me when I am asked to do something I haven’t done before.

Or being over your head. Mine is having to be onstage on a panel as a backup where it’s NOT my materials

Sometimes just giving voice to it helps a little bit

On the advice of a close friend, I am working on having gratitude for my inner critic.

Thoughts on how we get more comfortable in learning mode?

For me the imposter syndrome is that I am siting where a CEO or CISO or CIO sits pretending I can be a thought leader with their level of tech knowledge

You’re starting to make me wonder of often I get imposter syndrome because I frequently have to learn on the fly?

There is an amazing book called the Big Leap…Gay Hendricks. Stanford Psych prof. Talks about all the self sabotage we do every time we step into a zone where we don’t feel worthy of the success, love, whatever we have actually created in our life

I also tend to clock ridiculously long hours while I cram at night in order to show up informed and "qualified" on whatever the new business area is the next day.? 18 hour days are a killer on so many levels.

it’s great advice. Thank them for their contribution, and then remind them you don’t need this kind of advice anymore.

I struggle to accept the work I have done. I give that credit to others on my team. Did they really do the heavy lifting? What did I really contribute.

“Learning on the fly” is a strength, totally agree and it’s a great way to put it.

I think Imposter Syndrome is part of the growth process.? I feel that any time we embark on a new effort we have to fake it before we make it. Learn as we go.

Sometimes i feel like this group helps me overcome my imposter syndrome because you all generously and vulnerably talk about having to too, but then I also feel this group sometimes makes it worse because you are all so awesome and I don't feel up to snuff.? So complicated.

The opposite of imposter syndrome is much more damaging - overconfidence and zero desire to admit that they don’t know something. Lack of growth mindset. Seen this before and nothing good happens when someone is unwilling to learn

all you need to remember is everyone feels exactly the same

Sometimes when I attend this meeting and listen to the amazing people speak I think it fuels my impostor syndrome.

It’s funny I have had this conversation so many times where we spoke about the superpower and I have always been told it’s my ability to just get it done or figure it out.? BUT the negative side of that, I feel like I pay an emotional and mental price during that process. So I get through it but there is remnants of that after.

never in the history of humanity has logic made emotion feel better

I feel you as a fellow over-preparer. But that grit and attitude are part of our secret sauce!

Have not read the Big Leap..but at the moment reading "the Search" from Bruce Feiler and enjoy a lot.. He talks about workquakes and learning to deal with them.

love the thought of staying humble and being comfortable in learning mode.? A sign of strength not weakness.

New term Marketing Imposter Syndrome

Also, every other person thinks they can be a marketer. But never once have I thought I could be a better engineer than an engineer.

so much easier to know you’re good at positions that have clear input->output connections.

Yes - they really don't believe the marketing contribution - how do we share the value we provide?

Lets make it all up as we go along— We have that covered!

And also everyone thinks they can do marketing

you have just described my career path

so many marketing imposters

As they say, If you’re not ready to have everyone weigh in on how you should do your job - marketing probably isn’t for you (try engineering)

As with all things, i=this is both a blessing and a curse. Imposter syndrome is like 1% to the right of being humble and open

I learned how to "learn on the fly" very early on as I had to get a full time job at the age of 12.? So, I worked 40 hours/week and went to school full time all through Jr. High, HS, BA and MBA schooling.? So I know how to learn really fast.? My chronic concern is the retention piece of it.? AMAZING short-term memory but it's a crap shoot if you ask me something detailed about what I just delivered in front of the BOD last week.? Lol!!!

Helpful resource: CMO Confidential podcast with Mike Linton.? He speaks of the CMO role as the most scrutinized position in the C suite.

Yesss? - I'm experiencing this now. Many other functions are not letting go of Marketing because they think they know it. I'm trying to bring our team together as one.

My first day in my first marketing job, my manager put in her 2 weeks notice. I only once in my career had a manager that was actually a marketer. I always thought that was a disadvantage, but this is making me feel a loooooot better about it.

I have met so many co-founders with no marketing experience who think they are experts. They sit on the board and criticize and fuel the imposter syndrome too.

Or as a doctor once told me, your memory is a hard drive and by 30, its maxed and you are just writing over old information

thank you for sharing. I recently started my agency and there are so many pieces to it that I can’t help but feel as though I have to make things up the first time around. But it’s exciting at the same time, though there are days where It’s so helpful to hear that others do just the same.

Does it all come down to a simple thing on whether you care what people think or you just don’t? I have heard so many founders or CROs talk about stuff and it’s just wrong, people point out they are wrong and they frankly don’t let it get to the,

Pretty sure my hard drive is corrupt and full of bad sectors

Impostor syndrome gets amplified when you FAIL. And part of growing, especially in Marketing, is failing – trial and error. This is what makes Marketing tough.

It also inevitably brings you to communities like this to learn from one another (which I’m so grateful for)

not sure it’s the failing or the fear of it being pointed out and being made to look inadequate by someone else

Is it worse for marketing because we are surrounded by sales people with enormous egos and no humility?

Leading with confidence I think naturally leads to Imposter Syndrome.

Pushing through IS drives great personal growth!

Trust yourself

You can use IS to drive you to continually get better. . . .I like that concept.

?

I think at the end of the day it’s a balancing act - nobody wants to follow the leader who seems clueless about everything, of course balancing confidence with vulnerability is easier said than done

https://www.fastcompany.com/90600113/how-reframing-your-anxiety-this-way-can-help-conquer-impostor-syndrome

Agree.? Balance is key.

What are some ways to distinguish between impostor syndrome and truly being in over your head in a bad way?

This is probably anxiety fueling this question. But what do you do if you are fearful of failure for something but push through it and then actually fail and then get called out or worst lose your position (even though you may or may not be told it was because of that thing), how do you recover mentally?

hard to do I think.? Wondering if being in over your head is just about asking for help or finding ways to learn on the fly.

not an expert - but to me “good” imposter syndrome has ebbs and flows - there are days where you feel you’re at the top of the game and days that you feel like an impostor - if you’re constantly feeling the latter, I would say that’s a bad place to be in

by framing as a personal growth situation - debrief, integrate, move forward. Always growing

We may not be able to get away from learning on the fly because of how dynamic the space is

thats tough and I have been there to varying degrees.? One thing to keep in mind is that even if the worst happens, sometimes its not actually the worst.? If someone is going to can you for making a mistake, maybe that isn't where you should be anyway.? I think trying to parse out what mistakes you made versus what was out of your control is a good first step.? also, what he just said, succeed or learn.? But, its hard to depersonalize.

good way to look at it. Definitely feel ebbs and flows. Having some impostor syndrome is good. I think having too much and maybe all the time is not good.

“Failure is only failure if you learn nothing” LOVE THIS!

I've got a couple of "failures" that have been my biggest learning catalysts - it takes time to process but makes such a huge difference

I never lose, I win or learn - Nelson Mandela

https://overcomingtheimpostor.com <--- Free Sample Chapter all about reframing the fear of failure

Churchill: “The definition of success is moving from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”

I was talking to my therapist about this yesterday, and she did a sneaky thing.? She got me telling some stories of big wins in my life.? After a while, she asked me how I felt inside, and I felt a hell of a lot better.? I think sometimes its simply about pushing to change the stories we are telling ourselves.

One thing that helped me, I started framing how each department is actually an extension of marketing and giving examples.? Once they start to think about their efforts as “marketing” the perception starts to change a bit and they saw the the value a bit more.

Lived the “Marketing has a marketing problem” multiple times..

Progress - Passion - Purpose

If your CEO believes and backs you, it makes it MUCH easier to show the value and/or marketing marketing. The minute that goes, I feel it becomes next to impossible.

When the CEO decides to not like you any longer, it goes south quickly.

My old CEO added a metric to staff appraisals for their social media marketing (aka sharing of posts of LinkedIn) to? ensure they were part of the marketing function continuously.

sometimes it seems CEOs seem to feel they "need marketing" until they hire a CMO and then all of the sudden marketing is too expensive and squishy.

I’ve been practicing the Ho'oponopono (means 'to make things right’) prayer. It is a prayer and a Hawaiian practice for forgiveness. It is a powerful mantra for giving you a clean slate… that has helped me tremenduosly releasing the self-attack.

That professional identify piece also becomes an issue when it is time to think about the next phase of the journey - (euphemistically speaking about "refirement", and what comes after one de-emphasizes work to some degree_

Once the mojo goes you’re toast as a company and the finger pointing starts

The timing of this session is quite amazing. I have been asked to do something in a couple of weeks I have never done before and feel so uncomfortable, can’t get it out of my head.

We just talked about this with our sales organization. Marketing can give you a strong message but it needs to be delivered with confidence or it won’t land.

one of my long term ideas is to write a book about the role of spirituality and faith in corporate leadership.? At some point, we need to have faith in our decisions.? Data is helpful, but there is always a chasm between data and true prognostication.? It seems like we need to be more mindful of the fact that every decision we make at some point is a leap.

the problem is that my imposter syndrome tells me I'm not qualified to write it... :)

I’m gonna put my old psych hat on for this one but I think in most of these cases, it has everything to do with how you grew up - were the authority figures (parents, teachers, etc) in your life as a child supportive or critical of you? Environment has a lot to do with it but if you had an overly critical upbringing, I think you are falling into it no matter what.

I love Mark Mason’s “the Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.”

How about being the only woman in the C-suite? Often on a management team of older white men. It can be intimidating being the only "other"

would you say Imposter Syndrome comes more from fear of failure, or fear of embarrassment that could come with the failure (if you had to actually chose one over the other)?

FDR: Be utterly afraid of experimentation, It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly, and try another. But above all, try something.”

There does seem to be something about Marketing as a function…. At so many conferences and sessions I’ve attended, Marketers always feel that the organization will blame them or that other functions do not respect them

I have a friend of a friend who started a hedge fund where he developed an algorithm to measure "corporate arrogance" and then shorted those companies.? He made millions.

I've seen imposter syndrome creep up on me since entering entrepreneurship.

It was hiding as a desire to "help others".? I'm now pushing myself to stop "helping" (out of fear of judgment that comes from receiving payment) and start requiring investments for my expertise and time. I'm disappointed because I know better and would advise others (particularly women) never to do what I find myself doing now.

I bought “marketing for dummies” from that section of the bookstore when I got my first entry level marketing job and couldn’t understand the book, so then I felt like a REAL dummy ??

We’re all making it up as we go!

I guess we doubt the evidence, too. "Oh that doesn't really mean much..."

“I look good…on paper….”

Sometimes I wonder if I’m just so accustomed to imposter syndrome that I just ignore it. “Oh, that? It’s my annoying inner child. Don’t worry about it”

Last week I had to be very intentional of "getting out of my head" as I would spiral... it was bad... there is a book by Jeanie Allen that is really good if you struggle with that as well --- "Get out of your head"? - https://www.amazon.com/Get-Your-Head-Study-Guide/dp/0310116376/ref=sr_1_1?crid=36UZTFAPH6E86&keywords=get+out+of+your+head+jennie+allen&qid=1697814723&sprefix=get+out+of+your+head%2Caps%2C139&sr=8-1

going to LinkedIn to see if learning on the fly is a skill I can add to my profile

Every professor feels that way the first time thorough a course, doing it in the fly.? When I first started teaching somebody told me I just need to be one chapter ahead of the students.? That was a relief to me.

This is alarmingly therapeutic.

HOW to treat imposter syndrome -- an amazing TED talk, the 2nd most watched of all time. I've been using it, and it works wonders:

https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_may_shape_who_you_are

I have a doctorate and have been a professor for 14 years (with teaching awards) and I still wonder why I am in front of the class with every new class.

Jerry Colonna's book Reboot also stood out to me re: imposter syndrome

This is what one of the best topics and speakers I’ve heard in years. Thank you!

Chatgpt never has imposter syndrome

I wonder if this impacts CMOs a bit more than other functional leaders since marketing appears to be the only job the others in the C-Suite feel like they could do without any training.

Really liked this article on the topic, about the origin of the phrase too: https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2023/02/13/the-dubious-rise-of-impostor-syndrome

Anxiety can be your co-pilot. You just need to tell it that YOU are flying the plane and thank it for being there to keep you safe.

I find myself holding back sharing information or asking questions because in my mind they’re “so basic” or I fear I’m asking a question to an answer I should already know. How do you overcome that anxiety?

What if you don’t have imposter syndrome, but you ARE an imposter? (Asking for a friend.)

Wonder what the relationship between Imposter Syndrome and Self Confidence?? They can be intertwined with me at times.

https://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-Updated-Expanded-Maxwell-Maltz/dp/0399176136/ref=sr_1_3?crid=102N7HGCJ67NF&keywords=cyberkinetics+book&qid=1697815158&sprefix=cyberki%2Caps%2C108&sr=8-3

Absolutely. The times in my career when I felt the doubt and then leapt anyway, I learned the most.

I remember working for an ad agency, and someone shared: “you know more about this topic than 99% of the people in the room. That is why they pay us for that expertise” That has always stuck with me related to your area of focus

So far that's been true for me, too. When the fight or flight response kicks in and I'm doubting myself, then I now know it's a good opportunity.

Someone once told me you should always have one foot in and one foot out of your comfort zone. That's how you'll grow.

Feeling so seen right now!

I've found my sense of imposter syndrome has grown since WFH.

Someone once said about the innate intensity of fight or flight, how we’re no longer cavemen who need to live in fight or flight OR “there’s no longer a saber tooth tiger chasing you…”

A job search and interviewing really tests your imposter syndrome

Same, My entire anxiety has ratcheted up a ton since Covid.

I’m always telling myself “there’s no sabretooth tiger…”

I would love to hear about what to do after these fears DO play out. It is real but I also agree overcoming them are our strengths.

Getting Naked by Patrick Lencioni <— HIGHLY recommend

I wonder if marketers feel imposter syndrome even more heavily because we’re ALWAYS having to prove value and expertise.

Yes. And the fact that our function always is getting second-guessed by other executives who think they know “how to do Marketing”

or worse....we think we will never know them and can be replaced at any time?

its one of the areas ‘everyone’ seems to know about.? 99% of the people in the room think* they know more than they do.

regarding “what if you ARE an imposter?” One thing I’ve always leaned into is “you might out-expert me, but I’ll out-research you.” A silly quip I know, but the idea is we can all catch up, and learning by doing is only part of the equation

The additional traits - being an immigrant, minority etc, are added up on top of having it naturally

yes! I had a sales person tell me ‘if we do google words and that we should consider paying for our competitors brand.’? Well, thank you Bob, I hadn’t even ever thought about that…..

It’s the Dunning-Kruger effect other executives have regarding marketing

Im still waiting on LinkedIn posts from some founder about what makes a bad CFO or good CFO or bad CTO or good CTO. Waiting for years…

I used to have imposter syndrome about not having an MBA. Then I worked with a bunch of Stanford MBAs, no offense y’all. ??

I’d love to hear from others how “Imposter Syndrome” has manifested negatively in your entrepreneurial journeys. For me, it’s been that I’ve found I’m more comfortable “helping/volunteering” and thus, giving away tons of tremendous value. I thought it was altruistic initially, however, I realized it’s more because giving relieves me of performance expectations, and requiring the investment opens me up to potential criticism that I’ve been avoiding by volunteering my services. ????♀?

i have had to be scrappy for more than 20 years.? Everybody thought that all I knew was Marketing data so I learned the theory and the principles and Marketing Finance.? Everybody thought I could not implement Marketing automation or learn Salesforce CRM and I proved them wrong.?? It's going to continue as the newer technologies appear - all that can be done is master them to your own level of satisfaction and the confidence grows from there.

Isn’t that life in general? Always trying to figure it out.

I worked with PhDs at a business college and let me tell you some things about what they DON’T know

It’s what we talk about with kids - growth mindset vs. static mindset!

I like not knowing everything.

Whoever created zoom chat is an imposter for thinking they could create an interface that people can keep up with the convos.

Especially in marketing when you NEED so many skills

We are never going to know 100% - even Newton said he was just picking up shells on the shore and admitted he would never understand the ocean of knowledge. If Newton can’t do it … I mean, guys. Let’s take it easy on ourselves.

Love that.. my confidence comes from my abilities to figure sh*t out!!!

This is the most active chat I have ever seen on any Coffee Talk in the last 2 years

I feel like I can learn anything but often you have to make decisions quickly and that’s when my imposter syndrome kicks in

Figuring shit out is a superpower, for sure

there is a difference between theory and practical application. If people are not doing the work, there’s a good chance they are in a role that doesn’t do the work or never had practical knowledge

Another Imposter Syndrome trigger for me --? perceiving the Ageism I'm experiencing today.

What are the ways you know you are progressing on working it out on imposter syndrome?

Myers Briggs said I wasn’t good enough to get an acronym.

Yes!! But I feel the same about not being analytical enough.

I’m in marketing because as an introvert I want to be behind the scenes

Oh goodness, I’m creative and I swear, I’m a fish out of water in some of the marketing teams I work with who are VERY data drive

I find that imposter syndrome often gets in the way getting things done too.

One of my favorite Russ-isms is ‘hire for your greatest weaknesses’ and I have leaned into that and am totally okay saying ‘I am not the expert in XYZ, let’s hire for that’

I really appreciate all the vulnerability.

I can relate to your comment. I try to use a quick framework for decision making so I can at least feel like I made the decision because XYZ.

Another engineer here, who’s spent most of my career in Marketing. I also bring the Analytical skills, which I think is awesome as that becomes a bigger and bigger superpower for Marketers!

More analytical people are often much better at the business of marketing, ie, ensuring there is a commercial strategy at the heart of what you do.

Is imposter syndrome something we should want to overcome, or just learn to use it to our advantage?

I think marketing itself, uniquely this vocation, engenders imposter syndrome. We aren’t just doing our thing, we are all creating something new for someone else. You don’t just have to know marketing, you need to also understand the threats of cyber security, or database structures, or business process flow. It’s not just marketing, it’s marketing AND the subject matter.

there are various types of marketers - analytical data driven ones are sooooo important! just as much as the creatives!

I'm an engineer by education, to be honest I think the only way to do marketing well is to analyze a LOT and have creative people with you and be able to listen to them and go with some time wild ideas

there is a lid for every pot - it’s the match between you and the business! You are not out of place.

think it’s a great thing to know about yourself and find people who compliment your skillsets!

One of the WORST causes of imposter syndrome is a lot of advice being shared on LinkedIn that probably shouldn’t be shared. It can make you second guess your own expertise and experience when you really shouldn’t

I am all about decision frameworks. But when it’s something like — Hey, can you create a pipeline forecast based on limited data…. Then those decisions have consequences and then I spin....

ENTJ here, with some oscillation between E and I. Apparently ENTJ is the “commander” profile and most inclined to be CMO/strong marketer.

I’m working with the same, and I am experiencing it myself (and I’m supposed to be teaching it)

I've found that the more vulnerable I've been about my impostor syndrome at work the more people have been open to helping me and working with me

Man, that "what if they found out" question is persistent and heavy...

We suffer more in imagination than reality.

I agree with being vulnerable being a powerful thing — and think it’s a sign to change companies when you realize the environment you’re in doesn’t support vulnerability (thinking of a past company)

Brene Brown talks about vulnerability as the key to a happy life.

The rise of the self-proclaimed and underqualified experts that are winning due to popularity and cool soundbites (more than true expertise).

On a podcast this week, the person said, “what if they find out.” Then she said, “what are ‘they’ going to do, call the FCC and kick me off the internet?” YEs the story in your head can be the thief of comparison joy.

Impostor syndrome in marketing (to me) is driven by the hugely broad expectations of expertise - creative, branding, pr/comms, ROI, demand gen, online marketing, social marketing, ABM, etc, etc.

One of the great weaknesses found in the majority of marketer is the inability to analyze - financial and process - and is increasingly becoming critical. Sounds like you’re ahead of the curve!

I still think imposter syndrome comes from how you were raised. If your parents / teachers were especially critical on you early on, it’s hard for you to shake that in a work environment.

This is why I always post my shitshow on social media.

I wonder about how physiological safety relates to imposter syndrome.

Comparison is the thief of joy!!!

What is the saying about there are 3 people in a 1:1 convo…you, them, and how you’re interpreting or something like that?

This comparing yourself to what you think people think of you matches a lot of societal imposter syndrome and anxiety

Compare = Despair!

Exactly. It makes you not want to share insight because you question if you want to be authentic, or play the games necessary for online clout

Sometimes what becomes hard is we are player coaches who are getting better at vulnerability but we have a narcissistic founder who uses that vulnerability against us

I finally started to #buildthewall, the retaining wall in my backyard. But it’s 3 years into this project. It took me a year to get over my fear that the wall was going to fall down the hill and I was going to be embarrassed. I have like 5% done now, but I feel like I’ve gotten over the imposter syndrome of being a physical builder. ??

Interesting concept; my experience is that executive levels is often frowned upon in leadership meetings to show vulnerability (ie Weakness)

Google “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy”. There are books and workbooks on the topic Kris is talking about.

I always think of the quote - you wouldn't worry what other people thought of you if you knew how seldom they do

Love the concept of an? Explorers Mindset! it's critical: https://www.anexplorersmindset.com/

Have always felt I had to fake it till I make it!!

I bet we can come up with some good interview questions to ask — when interviewing for a leadership role — to gauge how welcome vulnerability is in the executive

Is it imposter syndrome or trauma from bad management?

Another facet of this is for those of us who are neurodivergent. As someone with ADHD, it magnifies the belief you aren’t as good, but it undercuts how you view your neurotypical-fueled strengths

I moved to the US 20 years ago, seeing all these so articulate strong women talk so nicely in English, while I still often make grammar mistakes, always make me feel like I would never be able to be that good

VaaS (vulnerability as a strength) - NEW acronym for us!

I need to say that have imposter syndrome PTSD. Talking about imposter syndrome triggers not so good memories ?? My heart is racing right now. Damn PTSD!

Healthy vulnerabiilty

I'm 33, always the youngest around the executive table, a woman, woman of colour too. So imposter syndrome has been a constant. However, what someone said before, good teams, good mentors, coaches and peers can really help with all of that.

Meditation is the best for this!!!

“Monkey mind” hits ENTJs when meditating

?I’ll remind you that many of us speak only one language.? So… you’re actually a step ahead.

I used to think I shouldn’t ask questions because I should already know the answers. Somewhere I turned a corner and realized the only way I’ll learn and get better is to ask - for info, for help, etc.

“The reality is most of the time, no one is thinking about you”.

We are not someone’s underestimation of us, including our own underestimation of ourselves.

Y'all I get nervous guest speaking to a bunch of undergrads!? It always works out well and I receive great feedback but I am nervous before. I mean really!!!!!? I have kids their age!!!? Franky more so than presenting to 200 sales people

I can relate. I sometimes forget words or misuse phrases.

I can relate to that. I also found that the majority of the room isn’t clear on the topic or item either!

What is that saying….something about you are the centre of no one’s universe but your own

I am always envious of people who can speak more than one language. I have a fear of sounding dumb when trying to speak the other languages I’ve studied.

I have found environmental issues, mostly toxic people and organizations, bring this out in me. Several years ago, I’ve tried to build an awareness of this. Strategically, I’ve implemented the “the no jerk” policy. In private the policy has a slightly different name:-;

Vulnerability will also probably help in not creating the next generation (children) with imposter syndrome. If we can act it then then we can show it and not keep the imposter machine running!

Calm is a super power!

Sometimes I ask really basic questions because I know others might want to ask them but are afraid

I recommend the book A Minute to Think by Juliet Funt

That is a powerful tool. I find myself asking, ‘what does that actually mean?’ frequently lately.

I love this community so much

These calls help me feel less imposter syndrome at work b/c I see the shared journey we are all on

I know that my success as a leader is directly related to my ability to be vulnerable and honest with my team. People ask me how I’m able to “get so much out of them” with a lean team, minimal resources, etc. - and I swear it is because of this incredibly deep trust I have in them and they have in me.

Going back to that early comment. where are the Zoom developers that written this awful chat interface not allowing to track the line of conversation??

Yes,? Trust! I want to be vulnerable but I just don’t feel safe.

interviews seem to exacerbate imposter syndrome.? the expectation is often that you are supposed to know everything

Can I bring you guys with me to a preso I am being asked to do in a while where I have SEVERE syndrome hitting me?

I always feel seen during these calls.

Prewiring is key. Keeps you from guessing what is on people's minds before the big meeting

Haha yes! The conversation is so good and so rich - so many thoughts!

Good point. Assuming intent is one of the easiest ways to create anxiety (and we usually miss the mark, too).

thank you for sharing your culture story. I immigrated as a kid, and my family is full of “traditional professionals” like doctors and lawyers, and here I am a B2B Marketer. It creates a different level of insecurity

Yes - the four agreements! So good.

Idk, I got into marketing because as a kid I really wanted to be an exec in a company where I can sit in a BOD and have the entire room tell me they know how to do my job. And then hear the same from every employee too. That was my dream. ??

One of the best things I ever did was take a $200 community college class on business 101

I have very high imposter syndrome and have tried everything to get through it.? No luck.? So my tactic is it to give it a time box.? i.e.? For 10 minutes today, I'm going to let those thoughts happen.? And then if they come up during the rest of my day, I mentally say "the time for that thought is later" and give it the attention then.? It's a technique I learned from caregiving a nephew with schizophrenia - that he uses for coping with voices.? It's been the only thing that really works for me.?? Realizing I can't stop it so I but guardrails around it.

I feel like imposter syndrome is like, part of being human?

Narcissist have imposter syndrome BIG time

yes! And it’s so dangerous fr those of us trying to co-exist with them

I feel like I’ve gotten addicted to being outside of my comfort zone. It’s boring to do what I know how to do. I could be a narcissist ??

That’s true, I’ve battled my own imposter syndrome by helping others with theirs!

Any tips for quieting the imposter syndrome voices during times of transition /uncertainty? that's when it really comes up for me

It’s VERY important to realize the very real danger of being effected by a narcisssist

I've been there, anxiety so bad I'm effectively frozen

My approach is a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy technique -btw if you want to research it.

I am working to purge “I can’t.” from my vocabulary (as well as that of my son” and replace it with some form of “I can’t yet” which feels like the first step of overcoming imposter syndrome.

Narcissism and imposter syndrome are NOT. opposites

Thank you for sharing.? Trusted space to share this king of thing.? You are brave in sharing.

ADHD — similar comorbidities

I like adding yet. I don't know yet. I can't yet.

I have always had imposter syndrome but it’s especially real as I look for a new role as a job seeker.

Sometimes your work environment is toxic and can further amplify impostor syndrome. And you just have to have the courage to walk away- a hard decision especially in the current environment. But well-being is important!

So appreciate your honesty, Charlie. Hoping our society can continue to be more comfortable with people sharing their mental health struggles.

Thank you so much for this conversation … I am not great at vulnerability either and don't even know where to begin to describe my imposter syndrome. I've struggled with it for all my career, although I feel like because of it I've always pushed myself that helped me to get where I am. But it doesn't get easier. It's so helpful we can talk about it openly here and feel that we are not alone.

Humble Confidence. I love that.

What happens when your version of imposter syndrome is about your (in)ability to figure it out?

I’m reading the first ever Self Help book and he talks about this, saying, “Such is true wisdom and humility; for the more a man really knows, the less conceited he will be.” Which I loved

Proud insecurity = narcissist, lots of those in leadership positions especially in American corporate culture

One thing I am confident about is my inability to listen and read at the same time….I’ll wait for the chat synopsis

Vulnerability… I go to therapy weekly and was telling my kids I had a drs appointment. Only to realize weeks in that my younger son was terrified that I was sick. That really opened up the conversation about therapy and normalizing mental heath

so true! Our culture seems to reward those with narcissist tendencies

the odd thing is that I see you as a guy I so admire. I follow your comments on the AI slack channel closely and always think, dang this guys is at least 3 steps ahead of me at all time :-)

Now I shout it from the roof tops… I’m going to THERAPY. You should too lol

My son is a senior and about to graduate and go on to college. Nothing about his middle school performance indicated he would be here today.

what this will come down to having a good founder/CEO to work under (assuming you don’t find a place who thinks CMO should roll into a CRO in which case RUN!)

Thx for sharing , we are in the THICK of it with a couple of our kids right now.? Trying our best to love and support them through it.

I’ve informally been a coach/accountability partner with lots of marketing leaders, including some on this call.? I think this imposter syndrome is the main reason why marketers can be great at marketing their company and product but struggle with effectively marketing themselves

https://linkedin.com/in/kriskelso

https://overcomingtheimpostor.com <--- Free Sample Chapter

I’ve found it hard to draw the line around saying you don’t know and creating doubt among those you’re trusting with that when it is your exec team

My exec coach has helped with many of these circumstances particularly since she had been through it before. I was so not open to it but I can say it helped. It’s a shame you don’t have them with you during every time an anxious situation pops up.

As I age and gain wisdom, I”m trying to adopt the “f*ck it job search/application”. Meaning f*ck the JD and go for it knowing I could do that job and apply without the overthinking and imposter syndrome.

my teams tell me "when you are CMO, be sure to hire me" but I hold myself back ?? I

This conversation/chat today is so amazing and I'm better today because of it. Would just like to say that I love you all and if you need anything, please reach out. Happy to help where I can. https://www.dhirubhai.net/in/christinabeaird/

Thank you all for sharing and being vulnerable and your tips for how you work through your feelings of impostor syndrome. It helps to know we aren't alone

WOW - “I have a track record of figuring things out”? Really insightful

This was amazing. I have to jump to go record a podcast but love this community so much. Thank you!!

?

One thing for me, over time, is I've felt way more guilt and shame for not trying (missing an opportunity) than for trying something and it going poorly - and it doesn't always go poorly. Ironically that's been motivating to (respectfully) shoot my shot.

I realized the CEO I finally felt comfortable working for subconsciously shows me how he overcomes the imposter syndrome daily through his behavior - that’s leadership

Chief Make-It-Up Officer

Great sessions. We need more of these because we are humans before we are CMOs or whatever else

I'm not a CMO on paper, but I've been "head of marketing" for 15 years. So on my LinkedIn I put "Chief Marketing Orchestrator" as a tiny way to overcome imposter syndrome. "Orchestrator" will turn to "Officer" one day...

The hamster wheel of keeping CEO and CRO "happy" when they ask for impossible things...

Yeah, I went on Prozac to deal with the toxicity

Yeah I think there is a lot of corporate bullying that goes on

100% … we have all seen that shit

I really needed this sesh today so thank you! I’m definitely getting this book

Wow that’s exactly what I’ve experienced! Glad I’m not alone!!

I’m amazing how I barely recognized myself in a toxic environment ??

“Head of” many times = “More hats, less pay” unfortunately.

I’m going to read Kris’ book, but I used this workbook 18 months ago… The CBT Workbook for Mental Health: Evidence-Based Exercises to Transform Negative Thoughts and Manage Your Well-Being https://www.amazon.com/dp/1647398053?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_dp_ZTZPJN3EB4C5M2K5T32X&language=en-US

Progress is not often linear and sometimes comparing to yesterday leads to higher imposter syndrome. Particularly in a job search.

That is EXACTLY it for me.? Throughout my career I have been tapped for every opportunity and surprised myself that I could do it (including CMO).? But I am not the one to say "put me in, coach!".? So now looking for my next real gig is scary to actually go after something big and bold. Even though I know I can do it.

I am surprised to see how many of us a dealing with this.? I thought I was in a small minority of people having these feelings.

Adult ADHD - https://wisesquirrels.com

I wish there was a safe place to call out toxic environments and leaders - to help folks before they decide to take on a new role.

So grateful I made the time for this today. T

Looking at that literally this week for myself, so many women get missed in diagnosis because we mask/internalize so often

I feel like we should just tell authors, if you come, they will buy. Come share awesome sessions, it will be worth it. ??

Great session today. Thanks for the great info Kris and thanks to everyone who shared and continued to the lively discussion and dialogue. I love this group!

“Faster Than Normal” is also a good book on neurodiversity and ADHD

This was a great validating session. Thank you so much @Matt and @Kris @all of you!

Your mind is a filthy liar.

I think in Jungian psychology he calls Kris' "The Imposter" "The Shadow"

I named mine Gremlin and I show him to the shed! LOL

Some companies will never overcome their toxic environments (run from them), but, for those that could, or already have good environments…. We can all use our leadership positions for good, demonstrate vulnerability, be supporting and coach/mentor others.

The critic’s voice is the imposter, not you!

Good lord if I could go back in time and convince my younger self of a few things....

Great question about kids! The one thing I truly want for both my teens is Confidence / Self Worth.

Yes, those curated social media feeds are weighing on Gen Z and A.

I’m struck by the levels of anxiety in our younger adults as well as the mental health awareness they are displaying

Because it reinforces the “you SHOULD be good at this” voice — you SHOULD be better, etc.

Beautiful session. Wonderful group. Thank you.

I think another thing that exacerbates imposter syndrome esp. for start up marketing leaders is when we leave b/c of toxic leaders. The leaders and recruiters later signal we left b/c of a lack of grit.

Growth mindset —— sooo good

https://www.amazon.com/Mindset-Psychology-Carol-S-Dweck/dp/0345472322

This convo has me singing:

I get knocked down

But I get up again

You're never going to keep me down

This session has fed my soul going into the weekend. Thank you, all.

AMAZING Session. We are all not alone. THANK YOU!!

One of my ex-marketing leaders and I text daily through our imposter syndrome - it helps us both stay objective, and champion each other

Terrific topic and session, a real boost before the weekend. Thank you Matt, Kris and all participants. Enjoy the weekend all :)

Great interactive session Kris — and no powerpoint slides!

Thank you all! This is so important

Terrific topic and I feel like we can do this for 4 hours straight

Thank you all!? I enjoyed this immensely.